perkypower, I have been married for 21 years and will be finalizing my divorce in the next month. Divorce was my idea, but it has still been painful. It is not like it is easy for one person and hard for the other. It is hard for both, no matter who initiates. I would say your process is probably going slowly because of the pain. My therapist says it takes 2-3 years to get over a divorce, from start to finish. Be kind to yourself and give yourself some space to grieve.

I hope this approach is helpful and healing for you. If you keep at it for months and don't make progress, it might be worth considering some other types of therapy that take a different approach. I do think people need to grieve when the marriage ends and it can be a long process.

I think a divorce support group can be very helpful. I didn't do one, but that's what I've heard. Your T will probably know of one to recommend. Or you can google it in your city.

RE emotional support from animals-- I remember when I moved out of the bedroom I shared with my H and into the downstairs guest bedroom, it was a very painful time and I cried most nights in bed. One of my cats would come sit right next to my head and put his paw on my arm and look right into my eyes. He had never done that before. He just knew I needed something, and he gave what he could. Do you have a pet or are you thinking of getting one?