Saphael,

Counseling is confidential - they should not be able to learn about it unless you tell them, which doesn't sound good for you. Do what you can to get some help; you really sound like you need it very badly. You may be the only one who can get you the help you need.

If you need to you may need to do whatever you can to free up your time some until you feel better. Do your best to not let your parents get to you, it's sad you need that kind of advice but sometimes people are not supportive and you need to protect yourself from them.

Hugs,

Leslie and the pixies