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Originally Posted by Rekon
One was me having to pay all the rent and bills and pay for all her food I started feeling as though I was being used, and I know it's hard to find work out there now a days but sometimes it just felt like she wasn't trying even if she was. I had paid full rent and utilities for almost 6 months now and I have been slightly depressed as well
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I had a job when we moved into together at the mall, but after christmas, they stopped giving a lot of people hours, me included. I have tried looking for a job, but it's really hard around here..I've applied at a lot of places, including McDonald's and Kroger's. When I had a job, all the money I got in my paycheck went straight to him, I never used any of it for me. Because I didn't want him to think I wasn't trying to contribute.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rekon
due to all of that I do drowned myself in video games because I find it better then drinking or using drugs like my father. I have been to substance abuse classes and I do know that I am the type of person to become addicted to things very easily. I do use video games to drowned the real world out because it's a place where I can feel different and sometimes even better than I am in person. My mom has told her as well as I have told her my problems. yes, I have stopped getting on the computer a lot more often, because we broke up after me finding out she had been talking to another guy named matt, then we got back together after a long talk and I cut back on the computer time a lot unless it was homework for the most part.
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Yes, his mother did tell me about his problems, but I think since even he knew about it, he shouldn't have let it go on so long and let me get to the point I was being neglected. He had done it ever since we moved in together, well before this Matt guy came into the picture. And yes, after we had gotten back together in early February, he had cut back on the computer time. and I was very grateful.
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Originally Posted by Rekon
This last week things have gotten better or so I thought until I found out she was still talking to matt which she has posted something about at this this tread (t=92502). We have currently broke up because she has lied to me a lot and I really do love her I would love to give her another chance and let her move back in but I think she needs to prove to me that she won't need another man to talk to besides myself and she will have to regain my trust. since she rarely talks to me about her problems and I believe that it may have been because of this other guy for the most part. I think maybe he was filling in the void since she can really never talk to a person face to face its always been hard for her and I know that and I'm trying to learn how to talk to her, so please do not take this as a personal attack. I was only posting this to give you an angle of the story you may not see since its only her side of the story. Sherry I do love you and I hope we can work these things out but it will take time.
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Almost every post I've posted on this site has somehow revolved around you...I cannot talk to guys because growing up I saw my mother get beat for trying to express her feelings to all of the guys she had in her life. I can talk to my guy friends a lot more better than a boyfriend, I have always been like that...I'm not sure why. This Matt guy, who is my ex-boyfriends best friend, was someone to talk to about sports (which you don't like) or our problems (because I wanted the oppsite sexes opinion) And yes, I lied to you about talking to Matt, because I didn't want to hurt his feelings at first...that's the type of person I am, and that is a downfall. I'm not trying to use that as an excuse, but everyone knows that's how I am..Only recently did I find out what he truly wanted, and I'm sorry for how things went..I really am.
I want to be with you, and move back in and be happy...because honestly I'm so scared that me not being there is just going to have you think that I'm doing something with a guy because you're not there to keep an eye on me. I am trying my best now to regain your trust, and I hope I'm doing good...the past is the past..it's unchangable and I've learned the hard way that dwelling on it is not worth it...I can't change the past, but I can make sure our present and future is better and that's what I'm hellbent on doing...Because I love you.