[findingmy_self95]

This is my first time in addictions section, but ive been on this site for almost a year. I never really wanted to admit it, but, my mom and dad have an acohol addiction problem. My mom always says how she fights to drink and she doesn't understand how thats a problem. You shouldn't have to fight it. My dad says, im old, let me do what I want with the rest of my ****** life. They do not understand how much its affecting me. My moms doing okay, but when she drinks shes abusive. My dad drinks hes depressed, loud and abnoxious. Its embarrasing and now Im starting to feel like acohol might just solve my problems even though I do know it won't. I don't know what to do with them and its causing me great stress in my life. Im only 15 and I wanna shoot ymself in the face.....

[splitimage]

Hi Brennan,

I've very sorry that you're in this situation & that your parent's aren't behaving like responsible adults. Addictions do that to people. But trust me, starting drinking yourself, will not solve anything, it will only make things worse. I don't know where you are in Canada but look up alanon or alateen. They're meetings for people whos family members or friends are alcoholic and they can be a great source of support plus give you lots of ideas to cope.

Feel free to post here as much as you like.

--splitimage

[madisgram]

hi brennan! there's another forum that may help you too...adult children of alcoholics. split image had a good suggestion...there is a free group called alateen that you might want to check out. it's for ppl your age that deal with alcoholism in their family/life. also al-anon. both are great support groups. you need to feel comfortable talking with ppl irl who deal with the probs as you. plus, we are always here for you too.
you can't change your parent's drinking prob unfortunately. but you do not have to feel alone. i am sorry you are having to live in that environment. it is not easy. but you are right, your drinking too would only add to the problem. wise of you to understand that.

[MrWoods]

My dad also drinks. im 21 now and a marine but it still lingers in my mind. ive only been really drunk 4 times and that was me being stupid in high school. my family for the most part are extreamest by nature so i know i have to watch what i do.
i dip any where from 1 to 2 cans of tabacco a day and i hardly ever drink. i have ADHD as well so im just not drinking anymore becasue i dont what to know how i will be on my adderall. i know its tough my dad gets loud and crazzy as hell. he drinks because his body herts so bad but he cant afford to get all the things done that needs done. he just got told his thyroid doest worky anymore at 39 so its been going for a long time and thats what has caused most of his pain. he was doing really good untill his mom passed 5 years ago and it sent him over the edge agin. but all in all we only really fought once when i was 18. he was drunk and something stupid happened and it went from fun to HOLY CRAP in 2.5 seconds. i was sore for a few days but i got him good. his ribs hert for weeks.

so you can take it from me i have been there and it does suck but it could always be worse. youll learn when its time to go sit in your room because things are about to get out of controll. when you get old enough and move out dont stop talking to them thow. i still talk to my mom and dad almost every weekend. your the one that keeps them from taking it to far. at least im hoping so.

just dont be like the majority of the world (including me to some fault) and let this hold you down and make your path for life. take it and it will make you stronger and go with it. become what ever you want to be.

[madisgram]

Originally Posted by MrWoods

My dad also drinks. im 21 now and a marine but it still lingers in my mind. ive only been really drunk 4 times and that was me being stupid in high school. my family for the most part are extreamest by nature so i know i have to watch what i do.
i dip any where from 1 to 2 cans of tabacco a day and i hardly ever drink. i have ADHD as well so im just not drinking anymore becasue i dont what to know how i will be on my adderall. i know its tough my dad gets loud and crazzy as hell. he drinks because his body herts so bad but he cant afford to get all the things done that needs done. he just got told his thyroid doest worky anymore at 39 so its been going for a long time and thats what has caused most of his pain. he was doing really good untill his mom passed 5 years ago and it sent him over the edge agin. but all in all we only really fought once when i was 18. he was drunk and something stupid happened and it went from fun to HOLY CRAP in 2.5 seconds. i was sore for a few days but i got him good. his ribs hert for weeks.

so you can take it from me i have been there and it does suck but it could always be worse. youll learn when its time to go sit in your room because things are about to get out of controll. when you get old enough and move out dont stop talking to them thow. i still talk to my mom and dad almost every weekend. your the one that keeps them from taking it to far. at least im hoping so.

just dont be like the majority of the world (including me to some fault) and let this hold you down and make your path for life. take it and it will make you stronger and go with it. become what ever you want to be.

u're right mrwoods, drinking and adderall don't mix. it could yield serious reactions to your mind and your body, hospitalization, etc.

[Ira_K]

Hi Brennan,
I am sorry about your situation. At 15, you should not have to deal with this. Please don't start drinking yourself, it will make everything worse. You just be strong, you'll get through it. Maybe find a support group in your city for family members of alcoholics, or look for a therapist, you'll need the support so you don't feel alone. Take care!

[MissingMyOldSelf]

Brennan,

I moved back home when I was 23 to help my dad out because he became such a mess while he drank. He soiled/wet himself, he'd forget things (like going on dates with his then-girlfriend), and he'd fall asleep while smoking cigarettes. This stemmed from his never being able to cope with my mom's accidental death from heart surgery. He never knew much about his dad since he left when my dad was a baby, but he always wondered if alcoholism followed in his dad's genes.

The only way I was able to cope with losing the dad that I used to have was that I attended Al Anon. I found some amazing people there, and my first day there, I got the phone numbers of almost 30 people -- every single person who was at the meeting, and they told me that if I ever felt the need to talk to someone, to call at any time of the day, and call ANYONE. I will never forget how happy I was to talk to people who understood.

I'm just so sorry that you're parents are picking up the feelings that you're throwing up at them with how disappointed you are in them for not being the type of parents that a 15 year old needs. I would see if you have a friend (maybe a little bit older, who drives), or another relative, and see if you can go to an Al Anon meeting. Maybe the support of your friend/relative will help, as well. My first meeting was very emotional, and I wasn't sure why I was crying so much. I didn't say anything other than hello, and my name, but I just cried my eyes out. I think the relief of finding people who care is what made me cry from sheer happiness.

And you are completely right - alcohol will NOT solve your problems. After all, you see how it affects your parents - your mom gets abusive, and your dad gets depressed.

I'm sending out love and hugs to you because I know it's hard. And if you would like to chat more, please feel free to PM me.