 |
| FAQ/Help |
| Calendar |
| Search |
|
#1
Apr 04, 2011, 10:01 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Not sure if this is the right group to post to. I have Bipolar and my boyfriend is a recovering Alcoholic. He is having issues with his ex-wife and drug abuse of crystal meth. Is this the right place to post the question/info I have about the situation and support we might be able to get?
|
|
#2
Apr 06, 2011, 10:17 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
you bet. what questions/concerns do you have?
is it the ex-wife who is using meth? not sure.
__________________
Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand |
|
#3
Apr 06, 2011, 06:27 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Yes, it is the ex-wife that is using meth. She has been doing it for quite some time now but there is no proof. She was doing it when my ex-boyfriend was married to her and she had other children from a previous marriage. The older kids got fed up with her drug abuse and neglect and went to live with their dad. The first husband requested a drug test be done but I guess there is some kind of shampoo that masks the meth and she passed the test. She didn't fight for her kids at all. She let them go live with dad and she hasn't seen them since.
While going through the divorce, my boyfriend was caught up in his alcohol addiction and got in trouble with the law. It was during the custody determination so he got his child on the typical every other weekend and holidays ruling that most dad's get. He has been clean and sober for many years now and would have many high-quality character references if needed. Our main issue is we are concerned for the safety of the child. We've talked to CPS, a child custody evaluator, a lawyer, etc. about the situation and we've been told there really isn't anything that can be done at this point. There needs to be a "smoking gun." The ex seems to be getting deeper and deeper into her disease and the child says the mom is up all night many times and the ex says she is doing paperwork (she's on welfare and doesn't work) or at the other end of the spectrum she sleeps all day and tells the child her meds are off. We don't know if she takes meds or not or what for so we don't truly know that part of the situation. My boyfriend has asked the child if they are safe and if they need to come live with him but the child has said no in the past. As things seem to be going downhill with the ex and her situation (afraid to post too many details but it's bad) the child did say she wanted to come live with my boyfriend. The child is still young and very loyal to the mother, but we do get snippets of the bad environment and bizarre behavior of the mother. The mom treats her as an adult and displays poor parenting choices like exposure to inappropriate media and much more. It's very upsetting. The child is extremely good looking and intelligent and has tons of potential to make a better life than the mother is modeling. In addition to that, we fear the safety issues an long-term ill-effects that may come out of living in this environment. I've posted on another forum and everyone else says get a lawyer. We have one and we've talked to all the right people but we keep getting the same answer nothing can be done at this point just be ready for the ex to fall apart. Does anyone have any other advice? I keep looking for the missing link or story of someone that has gone through and has a personal story or input. I don't want to just wait it out, but if that's what we have to do that's what we will do. Thanks so much for listening to the story. |
 DePressMe
|
|
#4
Apr 08, 2011, 08:58 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
how old is the child? even in the early teens they can request living with the other parent-you all. if the child still prefers the current living arrangement i don't believe you can do anything else unless you can prove in court the mother is negligent. as for the ex being on welfare can you advise them of the situation and the mother not making an effort to work? i wonder if this may help. wish i could be more helpful. you've already tried the avenues to get help tho. sorry for you having to face this situation. i know it is worrisome and frustrating. you may have to sit this one out.
__________________
Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand |
|
#5
Apr 19, 2011, 11:46 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Thanks for the feedback. The child is only 8.
|
|
#6
Apr 20, 2011, 03:11 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
Do a google search for your area it may give you the best information what to do at this stage. It is one of the worse drugs out there today. Children will many times hide their parents flaws instead of facing uncertainty and the stigma that most child services have today in the world. |
| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
|
My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
Linear Mode
