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#1
Dec 10, 2011, 10:34 AM
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My sponsor and I started with the serenity prayer. I started with the list of things I wanted no one to find out ie..Secrets, and my sex inventory. He wasn't moved. He was taking notes as I was sharing what I've written in the 4th step. I moved on to my Relationships, fears, guilt/shame, and resentments etc. As I continued he would stop me and HELP me to see the "EXACT NATURE" of the acts I was bringing to the light. This was Honesty on a new level than that of the steps previous. I was Trusting this person with my true self and he ACCEPTED me. I looked into his eyes from time to time and seen his compassion and understanding. I wasn't fearful as I thought I would be. I was ADMITTING to God and MYSELF as well. Im not in hiding anymore..No more secrets..I can Trust again..I seen the understanding and Compassion in Anothers face...Acceptance....As I was sharing he was helping me see what was behind the acts....The exact nature of it...Now I see...Awareness...God was there Too...Im not sure what I feel now. Now I've been seeing some patterns in my list inventory. The same Basic instincts distorted to an extreme level....DEFECTS OF CHARACTER...Am I Ready and Willing to have God remove them ???....I'm at step #6 now.....Easy does it...But let me do it..I'm not in a race but a process...Thanks, Neurontin 
__________________
 "All That We Send Into The Lives of Others Comes Back Into Our Own." Edwin Markham (1852-1940) American Poet
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#2
Feb 04, 2012, 01:07 PM
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Great Step......
__________________
"All That We Send Into The Lives of Others Comes Back Into Our Own." Edwin Markham (1852-1940) American Poet
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#3
Feb 04, 2012, 09:09 PM
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Congratulations Neurontin! you have faced yourself and another with God and joined the human race! It's one of the most wonderful feelings in the world. I found it to be freeing and uplifting. I felt llight as a cloud for a while afterward.
I hope you have a wonderful freedom and new happiness too.
__________________
 In the journey we learn and grow. The destination shows us how very far we have come and how far we have yet to go. |
 Neurontin
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 Neurontin
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#4
Mar 04, 2012, 03:32 PM
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Thanks
__________________
"All That We Send Into The Lives of Others Comes Back Into Our Own." Edwin Markham (1852-1940) American Poet
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#5
Mar 05, 2012, 12:26 AM
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As you say "..I'm not in a race but a process... " exactly. 6 says "we were ENTIRELY ready..." some of us miss the entirely ready part; if you don't get that part you don't get step 6. Best to you on your journey.
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| Neurontin
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#6
Mar 05, 2012, 02:23 AM
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Thanks. Its really hard to seperate my mental health from my addiction though. Its tough
__________________
"All That We Send Into The Lives of Others Comes Back Into Our Own." Edwin Markham (1852-1940) American Poet
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#7
Mar 06, 2012, 12:54 PM
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I've completed step 5 before. I think it is a lifetime thing, I'll need to do another at some point in the future. After taking an inventory of my behaviors and fears and resentments that I am aware of in my thoughts, I analyze the results. Then, based on my analysis, I conlude what is at the root of all those behaviors, fears and resentments, that chains me to my addiction. I admit to another human what the root cause is, and that I am to blame and it is my responsablity for correcting it. Most people do this with a sponsor, I do it in therapy, mostly. My root cause was I allowed the past to affect me too much in the present. I have addressed this problem and I am making progress in correcting it.
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| Neurontin
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| Neurontin
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#8
Mar 10, 2012, 02:17 AM
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Great..... Thanks for sharing that thats awesome. Keep up the good work. Great awareness..Peter
__________________
"All That We Send Into The Lives of Others Comes Back Into Our Own." Edwin Markham (1852-1940) American Poet
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