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#1
Apr 29, 2006, 06:43 PM
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A vast plain of desert lingers before my eyes,
Mountains can be seen in the distance, but there is a barriar of lonliness and lies. Too long I have gone without "water" and my thirst is seeking, hollow, and dry. The sun is getting much hotter, descending faster and faster from the hollowness of the sky. It envelopes me, drowning me with its beams, I waver in its arms, anticipating the slaughter, But tormenting and toying is its only means. Patricia |
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#2
Apr 29, 2006, 06:49 PM
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Too late...
I should have called or done something.... I know better.... I took a few drinks!!!!!  (HUGE SIGH) Patricia, I hate being in the present situation that I'm in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 |
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#3
Apr 29, 2006, 06:52 PM
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Patricia,
whats done is done. Lets leave it at that, just recognize where you went wrong, which you did. You said " I should have called someone" Well, thats good! Sounds like you know what it is you have to do, and are going to do it next time. YOu can start right now.  I know you can do it.
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#4
Apr 29, 2006, 08:10 PM
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rainbowzz,
I have to admit something, as of next week I will have to have a machine in my car for 3 yrs, I am finding any and every excuse to drink before this happens and I am really not proud of myself... Patricia 
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#5
Apr 29, 2006, 11:15 PM
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Patricia,
Thank you so much for sharing. I understand how you feel. Though I said im not sure yet whether i fully beleive I have an alchohol problem, I can still understand why you feel the way you do. When i get backed into corners I tend to go overboard as well. My current biggest issue is abandonment which you might not think is the same thing - but let me explain. When I fear someone is going to go away, I CLING desperately to them. I get extremely upset if I cant see them or they cant see me. I will go to just about any lengths to hold on to them even doing things which are destructive. SO you see, whether it be alchohol or something else, this shows that there are tons of us struggling with the same basic issues. and i think that in itself can help us be strong. |
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#6
May 01, 2006, 09:40 AM
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Thanks rainbowzz,
what you said makes alot of sense, I think I am "CLINGING" desperstely to my alcohol because I know I am going to lose it soon... thanks and take care, Patricia xx |
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