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#1
Aug 17, 2012, 12:48 PM
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So, I have spent the past week or two getting as high as possible. I felt like it doesn't effect me, and it doesn't change how I am. I was wrong.
 The only thing I remember from that time...is that I couldn't remember anything bad that happened in my life. (I guess that's good in a way.) But I hated not knowing why I was really depressed. It's been about 10 hours since the last time I did any kind of drug, and i'm already realizing that all it does is make me feel worse. Something that should make me happy, and make me have fun...just makes me more depressed than I was before. I'm done. I have finally told myself that I refuse to do this anymore. I really hope I can do it, this time.
__________________
His sick, twisted mind, was in control. I was the puppet, and he was the master... 
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 justaSeeker
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 justaSeeker
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#2
Aug 17, 2012, 01:08 PM
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I sure hope that you can too. There's a good poem about recovery; I'm not sure if I shared it with you or not, but here it is...It's called an Autobiography in 5 chapters. A friend of mine passed this on to me many years ago. It helped him get free from a lot of alcohol and drug use that was plaguing him.
AUTOBIOGRAPHY IN FIVE SHORT CHAPTERS
by Portia Nelson Chapter I I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk I fall in. I am lost ... I am helpless. It isn't my fault. It takes me forever to find a way out. Chapter II I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don't see it. I fall in again. I can't believe I am in the same place but, it isn't my fault. It still takes a long time to get out. Chapter III I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it is there. I still fall in ... it's a habit. my eyes are open I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately. Chapter IV I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it. Chapter V I walk down another street. |
| RunningEagleRuns, Ticli-Otops
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| justaSeeker, Ticli-Otops, We_do_recover
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#3
Aug 18, 2012, 03:43 PM
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I love that poem, gave me chills. There is a better life after, I quit over a year ago and I pray for help. My mind wanted me to go back lately. Things kinda got worse in some ways. But thinking back they werent as I think now, I am sober and not destroying my body any longer. Ive seen people die from it and get very ill. I want to live.
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| Ticli-Otops
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| regretful
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