[Nessa213]

I've always kind of run to shopping as an outlet to my frustrations. Always. Bad day? Calls for some retail therapy. Great day? Let's celebrate by going shopping!

It's a weird thing for me. I like to go alone, don't know if this is normal or not. And I also much prefer to go to the mall/shops/store in person rather than shop online. That's not to say I don't also shop online, but I just like the feeling of shopping. Sometimes, I don't even feel like I have to buy anything. A good walk around the mall for a few hours will still give me the same affect. (Also slightly ashamed to say that I at one time that I could watch the home shopping channel for days, literal days, on end.)

It's a buzz, it totally is. Finding the deals. Tracking down that PERFECT item. I get giddy, I get happy... beyond happy. But then... I go home. And I look at the receipt and a small part of me dies a little inside.

My dad (also a spendaholic) always used to tell me, "You will always regret the things you do not buy." His addiction, in my opinion, has always been FAR worse than mine. To be fair, he buys some amazing things. But for me, I buy little things.. a LOT of them... but little nonetheless. (Recently have become hooked on Sephora, only slightly ashamed to say that I might have just placed an order tonight), but my father buys cars. Classic, cool and awesome cars, to be fair. But cars worth $20k, $50k, or $100k.

When I was in high school (and all through college) we started hitting up the garage sale scene. We went EVERY week in the summer for a good 10 years. And we would come home with FAR more items than would even fit in either of our houses. In addition, we would also hit up the flea markets. A three day a week endeavor centered solely around acquiring... well... junk... basically.

In 2007 I had my first credit card disaster. It was part bipolar manic episode and part shopaholic frenzy. TVs. Computers. Cameras. Laptops. A dog. (His name was Rosco. A purebred dachshund who actually just died last summer at the age of 5.) Sorry... sidetrack... Anyway... After I amassed a credit card debt that might make the Federal Reserve blush, I promised myself that I would never get that bad again. No matter what my frame of mind.

Unfortunately this didn't really take away the desire to shop. After that I remember hitting up the local thrift store about 4 times a week. Seriously. Who needs that many clothes? I did... apparently. Most of the clothes I bought has since been donated to the local homeless shelter. (At least SOME good came out of that.)

For a long time, from about late 2008 until 2011 or so, I remember doing REALLY well. It had been SUCH a long time since I've had any kind of reckless spending. I actually was taking pride in being probably the thriftiest person I knew. Still shopping exclusively at thrift stores for clothes, and only once every other week or so. Because by now I've ALSO accrued SO much student loan debt that it makes me cry... real tears.

Recently it seems I've been facing... I don't know... a relapse, if that's the right word? Like I said, I've recently become hooked on Sephora, and two years ago I opened a Discover card thinking I was ready. Around the same time I opened a Best Buy credit card... again thinking I could handle.

Long story short: I apparently wasn't ready, and I can't handle it.

I don't know what the point of this post was. A coming out? Perhaps? Maybe wondering if anyone else is going through this?

And if you made it this far... thanks for reading!

[roads]

I know four women with shopping addictions, none are Daddy's Little Girl's. I think that's an irony in your case. You two like hanging together!
The women vary. One's is an heiress who shop online only, hardly ever open a box. I try to get hey some real hobbies, and the dog and computer and gardening work best. Another buy a car-full then return 3/4. But she has great taste and if I need something for a special event she gets it right the first time. Third buys only at WalMart, no taste, but great buys. Fourth stocks up for the next disaster (e.g., hurricane).
I think it's an obsession or addiction--not wise purchasing. Just my opinion.

[Leed]

You're definitely a shopaholic. But ya know, what can you do with all those "things?" Life isn't about "things." Years from now, you'll have all these "things" and wonder what the heck to do with them.

If you try, you can feel fulfilled by other things than shopping. What about people? Wouldn't it be fulfilling to help other people? Wouldn't you feel good inside if you helped someone (without thought of any thanks, of course)? Doing something for someone else always makes you feel good, especially if you don't expect any thanks or reward from it. Maybe volunteering at a Senior Center, or volunteering at a hospital -- both would be very rewarding.

Life isn't about stuff. Life is about people. I hope some day you can experience it. God bless and please take care. Hugs, Lee

Wow! I have never known somebody like you! lol I like the way you write =) I wish I had some experience here, but I can only relate to your addiction with my own, which is substances. Can we beat it? Yes! Has it ever been done? Yes! You can be free beloved. It sounds like your problem with spending has occupied enough of your conciousness that you are very aware of it. This should keep you in check so to speak. And if you fall, just get back up again and keep walking. Recognize your triggers, flee from them if possible. Best of success my friend.

[layla11]

Hi Nissa213, I think this was a learned habit for me. My sister and I both. Thanks for sharing honestly about this. A friend of mine told me several years ago, she was from alanon, she said "your mom taught you that". I talk about her off and on, shes 75 now and been through a lot in her life and is also very wise, she pretty much saved my life in the past . We don't talk much now, I need to call and see hows shes doing. It makes since what Leed said to help others.
ps, I'm from Ohio to.