Soon to be 21 - scared for my son

My son will be turning 21 in a less than a month. He has an alcohol problem where he can not stop once he starts. It has gotten better and he has gone longer periods of time w/out it BUT when he relapses it is always bad. He was into the hard stuff prior to seeing his therapist. Stopped and was put on anxiety meds because he has social anxiety and depression. Really thought the therapist was working and now the past 3 to 4 weeks he lovely girlfriend whom may I add is 21 and knows first hand how he is started buying it for him again. She said he is manipulative and so she just gives in. He has been drinking now every weekend and thinks I don't know. I always search his room after he leaves for work and I find it in the trash or shoved in his drawers. He was told the last time when he drank that much he could have died that we won't go down this road again. He never listens and always tries to make us look like the bad guys. "Oh you are going to throw your son out who is graduating college 1 1/2 years early and who as a result has saved you money on housing, etc." He forgets how much damage he had done prior to his car that we fixed due to going out in bad weather to get booze. His room is trashed from when he was belligerent drunk. He has not been that way in a while but I am scared. In 100 days he will be moving across the country. He feels we need to be there to financially support him if he has problems..... He doesn't get it that we don't have the extra money to do that.
I literally can't take it anymore. He has drained every ounce of happiness from me. Yes, he does well in college and at his part time job but the memories of his alcohol abuse haunt me.

I can understand your frustration. My stepdaughter has gone down the same road. But until he admits there is a problem and seriously gets help for himself there is not much you can do except cut off funding for him. Tough love is hard to do but may be your only choice at this time.

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Hang in there
have hope!

I have a question: If he's underaged, who's supplying him with the alcohol? It sounds like he got started early, like before he was 18? If that's the case, you could've just monitored him more and made sure he stayed home to keep him from developing such a problem.