[ReddSkyes]

I'm told there's a difference. I'll try and keep this as to the point as I can. This is about an ex-friend and I guess I'm just looking for some insight.

He doesn't drink every day, and can actually abstain from it whenever he chooses to. He drinks approximately once a week and maybe a few times per month when he goes out. He can drink a lot. Over time he became more difficult while drinking. He says wine makes him see things clearly, and he speaks truths (according to him) in very hurtful ways. Not ridiculing, but also not giving a sh--.

Other hard liquors made him combative. It used to be that wine merely made him see through the BS and call it out. Over time this overlapped and I couldn't tell the difference. He's combative period. He knew he was too. He admitted it to me one day and I just about fainted!

[flyingbirds097]

Drinking once a week and a few times per month shouldn't be a serious problem. There is still enough scope to help him out of this combative situation. Motivate him to reduce drinking amount slowly and completely at a certain time. Help from you and his family seems to me the initial steps to get him out of this situation.

[notz]

Based on my experience, many alcoholics started out the way you describe. A little problem with alcohol practiced well eventually became alcoholism. Initially I could take it or leave it too and it gave me what I needed to come out of my shell and be fun and sociable. But with every drink and every month and year drinking I just became less fun and more disagreeable with worsening consequences.

If he drinks alcohol and becomes (physically?) combative or verbally abusive when otherwise he is not, is that not a negative? Since his behavior changes in a negative way then choosing to drink will carry consequences that will likely escalate over the years.

Your friend will ultimately be the one to decide. I had many friends "talk" to me about "my drinking" meaning that they considerately told me I drank too much and became obnoxious. I ignored them for a long time. Finally I had to look myself in the eye and make a decision. There was/is no reduced drinking for me, I can't drink alcohol, period. I hope your friend will be ok.

[Mygrandjourney]

Loss of control, frequent hangovers, missing work/school or other important commitments, drinking against medical advice, drinking in spite of serious consequences are all signs of a pending or actual problem, regardless of the frequency in which one drinks.