[artie]

I drink a bit more than a bottle of wine every second day in a session of an hour or two, I'd like to cut down to maybe once a week for physical health reasons on doctors advice (I'm in my forties) any suggestions on how or other comments?

I enjoy being sober just as much as being drunk but seem to need this routine, it's like a break.

Originally some degree of social anxiety seemed to be a factor, I'm pretty introverted, there is the saying "drink eases the pain of solitude", for me it eases the pain of company, but nowdays more often I'm happy drinking alone, but usually amongst people, in a bar, partying in my head.

I'm also worried about slipping into alcoholism, everyone seems to think I'm not one, yet, I'm not quite so sure, do I sound close to anyone? (This drinking pattern has been stable for around 8 years with breaks, before that usually once a week).

Cheers (haha)

[splitimage]

Only you can decide if you are an alcoholic or not. Is your drinking interfering with your life in any way? Have you tried to quit before and been unable to? You say you drink to change how you feel - that's kind of risky, and a lot of alcoholics start out by drinking to change how they feel.

Personally I couldn't cut back. I am an alcoholic and once I start drinking I can't stop, so my only option was to stop completely.

Have you heard of harm reduction? That sort of sounds like what you're asking about. That's the idea that the person can continue to use their substance but modify it so that it has less impact on their lives. You might begin by setting goals, such as only drinking half a bottle of wine, or only drinking on weekends. I do know a few people who have successfully cut way back on their alcohol or drug use using harm reduction techniques so it can work for some people. But it's pretty hard to do alone. Most people I know who have successfully used harm reduction have had some form of group therapy around goal setting and behaviour modification. You might try contacting some addictions counsellors or even therapists and see if they are willing to work on a harm reduction plan with you.

It's really good that you're looking at your drinking and thinking about doing something about it.

--splitimage

[artie]

I think the only way I can cut down or quit drinking is with substitutes (that arn't as bad), I did that with smoking, I substituted with herbal smokes (with no tobacco/nicotine) and popcorn, but only for a while, now I'd say cold water is my only substitute.

I really had to outsmart, trick, the addiction rather than overcome it with will power, that was utterly fultile (& it seems to be what most anti-smokers expect you to do).

I'm thinking of trying the same with drink, things like getting a car and taking my dog somewhere completely new and different instead of getting drunk, that might be like a pleasant complete break, like an altered state of conciousness, or even regular camping maybe.

I suppose I was really looking for any suggestions for substitutes for drinking that have worked for other people, or ideas that might give me ideas.

I don't know the official view of substition, my Doc didn't think much of the tonnes of popcorn, but it worked. Any thoughts on substitution as a technique?

I hear you Splitimage about it being easier to quit completely than cut back, I read only around 15% of alcoholics can cut down, the rest it's all or nothing. I'm still hoping I'm dependent rather than alcoholic so may be able to continue a bit.

[splitimage]

Ok - substitutions, I hear you. good idea, after all you have to do something with the time you used to spend drinking. The second treatment centre I was in spent lots of time on replacements for drinking.

I like the idea of walking your dog, exercise is always good, and especially now that summer is coming, being outside is always nice.

I know that when I first quit drinking I was so used to the idea of having a drink with the paper as soon as I got home, that I had to have another drink. I substituted club soda mixed with cranberry juice and had a huge glass. (I'm talking like 16 oz)

I don't know if you're into crafts at all, but crafts are sometimes a substitute for me (I knit, embroider etc) so I do that in evenings instead of drinking. Maybe now's a good time to learn a new hobby.

Of course the ultimate substitution for me is AA meetings, when I first quit I went to like 7 a week, now I'm down to about 3.

I also volunteer one evening a week on a telephone support line. So volunteering might be an option.

Be creative think about things you'd like to do instead of drinking and do them.

Good luck.

--splitimage

[madisgram]

glad you posted, artie. i found an unusual situation when alcohol entered my life. once it was becoming a problem in my life, no one had the courage to say, you've got a problem. i think ppl are afraid to confront other ppl but guess it's human nature. i wish someone had said something to me. i became a drink alone person...it was easier cause i didn't have to put up the pretense of socially drinking....i could drink like i wanted to..over time it became a 24/7 JOB. i was chained to the bottle.
that may not be your case but i'm glad you are thinking about your drinking habits. i was told one time, if you drink to create a feeling or to numb a feeling you're drinking for the wrong reason.
hope you will keep us posted on how you are doing. oh by the way, i told my doc i didn't understand why i was drinking more and he just pooh-poohed my concern. even doctors many times disregard info that they should address. when he blew it off, i said well i guess it's not a problem afterall. i was dead wrong. i'm sober today..well for quite some time...and i no longer need alcohol in my life to make me feel or not feel.

[artie]

Thanks for that, yes altering mood is part of it, even more I think it's the way it alters perception, makes things more interesting, harmonious, artistic-poetic (I know it's rubbish, even when I'm drunk in the back of my mind, but enjoy the lie/illusion) I expect that's considered at least as much of a problem as wanting to alter mood, I suppose it's all tied up together or may be considered the same thing.

I know I can do it but it will be hard and take time, I tried quiting smoking many times before I finally did it for good.

[twiggy123]

I understand the drinking to deal with company. I have done that myself, by myself off and on for years. I would rather drink alone tho.
I have it under control compared with a couple of years ago. I cut down to wine instead of vodka because I would be drunk before I knew it. The wine just takes the edge off, but if I am not careful I will binge drink and I am afraid of that.
I would like any suggestions to just quit any more than I do now. Like I say I am not at all close to being the drinker that I was, but I still get the urge.

Sometimes I can go weeks, but get it on my mind and that's that for me.

My husband thinks that I have a problem, but he doesn't think of me as an alcoholic. He drinks NOTHING, so it is a solitary thing for me if I want to drink. I drink when he isn't home or just go have a couple of quick glasses and brush my teeth so he doesn't notice. That says that there is a problem. I feel like I am getting away with something if he doesn't know and he really is my best friend. So I don't understand my doing it even. Sometimes it is social anxiety with me. But I can't get outof hand , this has happened and I have really been embaressed (?) when I hear of things I did without knowing. That is why I cut out the hard stuff. Maybe we can help each other with this "Empty" drinking for no reason when we can do without it for a while.

[artie]

Originally Posted by twiggy123

I would like any suggestions to just quit any more than I do now. Like I say I am not at all close to being the drinker that I was, but I still get the urge.

Sometimes I can go weeks, but get it on my mind and that's that for me.

I've actually quit since writing that, cutting down seemed to hard, well it's only been 2 weeks but I feel confident. I'm not actually sure how I did it, I went on a diet after being shocked by some photos of myself on holiday, I think the attitude of not being a servant to impuses, appetitites with food easily transferred to drink.

I also think 2 very wise men "showed me the light"

The idea of health as the meaning of life suddenly started to make sense to me, writer/farmer Wendell Berry probably steared me towards this more than anyone.

Finally another (bestselling) author, Dr Al Bernstein, who defines mental health as maturity says you should never run from something out of fear, the path to safety is through facing your fears, I think drinking(a lot at least) in a social situation is a kind of running away out of fear. I'll just have to have some guts.