[Fig4]

Hi. I've struggled with my eating disorder since I was 15. I'm now 67. I've had periodsof recovery, but it always comes back, and it's been in fullforce for the past 10 years.

I'm watching the numbers go down, thrilled by that, delighted that I'm fitting into ever smaller clothes. I look really thin (so I'm told). I'm small, just under 5'. Sometimes I see what others see, sometimes not. I want to lose more. The doctor doesn't want me to lose any more.

I do eat a healthy diet, given what I eat. I'm a vegetarian. I'm very regimented with my food, panic if I go over my allotment. I'm driven by my "rules" and restrictions.

So there it is. I know better, know what I should be doing, but I don't do it. This is madness.

[eskielover]

It comes & goes.....I am sure that your MD is monitoring your physical health as mine did when the anorexia got really bad the last time....but that was do to trauma & major stress & it landed me in the medical hospital requiring a central line & IV nutrition....right at the time my mother was dying of cancer.

Life is a struggle......we do the best we can do & enjoy the good times. I know that seeing the weight to down & it triggers the desire for even more weight loss.......but with MD monitoring....they will only allow it to go so low & the blood work to go to only a certain point before requiring treatment....I'm sure you have been through that before with all these years of dealing with it.

[Fuzzybear]