[DeftRabbit]

I've been diagnosed with Type 2 Bipolar disorder, and that's the main reason why I'm seeing a therapist, but lately I've been heavily restricting my calories (trying to stay around 200cal/day), and I like it because it feels like I have control over something. I don't want that to go away, and I don't want to talk about it with him. Can I keep it to myself, or should I tell him anyway, even with the intention to continue doing it?

[Skeezyks]

Hello DeftRabbit: Well... from my perspective... you, or someone, is paying your therapist to help you. He can only do that if you are honest with him. Keeping something like this from him is really defeating the whole purpose of going to therapy. Why bother? But, in addition, anorexia can become a serious, even life-threatening, condition. It's important to explore what is going on with you in that regard before the condition becomes even more ingrained & serious than it is now... in my opinion.

I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!

[Victoria'smom]

Can you say "I have anorexia but I don't want to talk about it."? Just because you tell doesn't mean it stops. It means your willing to let him in a little more. My T and I worked around talking about it. Some times she'd ask how eating was going but would drop it after I answered: good,fair, poor. She even helped me out of a program that was being more harmful then good without disclosing why. Just because you tell doesn't mean you loose control. It means you have even more control and a secret person in your corner for the times that your ED gets controlling.

[Stronger]

Hi friend,
Welcome to PC!

I say, definitely yes. Do tell. Because eating disorders thrive in solitude. And that feeling of control, is just an illusion. Trust me. Pretty soon you'll realize that your ED is controlling you. It may be really really hard to tell your T, but it'll be worth it!
Good luck!

[eskielover]

It's good for them to know just in case it does get really bad, then they can bring it up in a good way.

I have been fairly well from the anorexia I was dealing with 11 years ago, & was staying at a healthy weight. Have gained a little more than I want & commented about wanting to lose a little to my psychologist. She asked me if it was me talking or my anorexia returning. It's me but once I start losing anorexia is easy to take over so glad she knows & can keep me on track.

[EmilyTheStrange]

Hi DeftRabbit
I just wanted to say i understand what you mean. I also have bipolar, and after a time of high stress 5yrs ago i developed an eating disorder after i wanted to lose 7lbs. The diet went crazy. I wasn't restricting as low as you are (mine was 800) and i went to my doctor for help. Essentially he told me it was because of anxiety and gave me an antidepressant. Then i self referred for NHS counselling (i think its about 6 sessions) and she never discussed it either.
The AD made my moods swing like mad which led to the bipolar diagnosis.

5yrs later and I've restricted the whole time. The number has gone up and down, and i managed to gradually regain the weight i lost minus the bit i wanted to lose in the first place.

In September i felt panicked about my weight again, but i still think maybe it's stress related due to my son's medical problems. It's a form of control when everything else feels out of control. It's the one thing i can 'achieve' and keep a grip of.
I also don't want to tell anyone about it because i don't want anyone to take it away from me.
I lost weight at first since Sept, but I'm not losing weight now despite the low calories, so i think I've probably screwed up my metabolism. Of course years down the line there can be medical problems because of what we are doing now. And i know that, but i still can't let go.

In the past i have fought through the thoughts and managed to increase gradually by myself, so it can be done. Sooner is better than later.
You can still feel like you have control at a much higher intake than 200cals, i know its hard to get past the number in your head, but i just kept trying and it was ok.

Having someone to talk to and support you would be more help than trying to do it alone.

Take care

[Starving2death]

If you don't tell your therapist you're going for no reason. The reason I'd see a psychologist is to get their help. Anorexia is deadly serious disease that's extremely difficult to recover from. Would you really want to be anorexic in 20 years? That's where it'll take you and then it's ten times harder to get out of it.

[Gr3tta_0]

Be aware an eating disorder diagnosis has consequences.
I don't say that to indicate you should not say something, not at all, just think things through, and think about your purpose in disclosing vs not disclosing.

[glitterbutterfly]

Originally Posted by Starving2death

If you don't tell your therapist you're going for no reason. The reason I'd see a psychologist is to get their help. Anorexia is deadly serious disease that's extremely difficult to recover from. Would you really want to be anorexic in 20 years? That's where it'll take you and then it's ten times harder to get out of it.

I agree, please tell your psychologist