[not quite right]

Thinking about being 36 years old, a waitress for the same company for 11 years, & living day to day in a cold world I have to wonder. Did I take a wrong turn? Or is my brain incapable of letting me succeed. Am I just a helpless victim of a dabilitating mental illness, or did I just mess things up? Once upon a time I had a future. Now the only thing I have to strive for is a disability check. Could I have been something greater? Could I have been anything else than who I am? It's just like 20 years passed & I'm wondering what the Hell happened. I guess people all have a part in the world, I'm frightened that mine is destined to be a tragedy. Who am I? Why am I this way? Where's my future? I feel cheated.

[uchiha]

You are not alone, I often feel the same way. I wonder on weekly basis whether my life could of been more, more than what it is. I think it is human nature to reflect and question the choices we have made. Everyday is an opportunity to choose differently, to do something more. I am currently working on changing my life for the better, making small decisions daily, hoping that they will all add up to something great. So, stop thinking about what coud of been and focus on what you can do now.

Hopes this helps.

["Tilly may"]

Originally Posted by uchiha

You are not alone, I often feel the same way. I wonder on weekly basis whether my life could of been more, more than what it is. I think it is human nature to reflect and question the choices we have made. Everyday is an opportunity to choose differently, to do something more. I am currently working on changing my life for the better, making small decisions daily, hoping that they will all add up to something great. So, stop thinking about what coud of been and focus on what you can do now.

Hopes this helps.

Wow, well said.

[gayleggg]

I feel the same way, except for more years lost. I chosen the wrong path at times and some is just a result of my illness. I try not to think about what might have been because it only stresses me out. I try to think in terms of only today and to get through this as best as I can.
Best wishes to you.
Gayle

[not quite right]

Well, life turns on ya pretty quickly. This past Sunday, my husband attempted suicide in an unnecessary and extreme fashion. I just want a little stability & peace. He is very angry at me for calling the police & ambulance & for his 72 hour hold. For 14 years he's been dangerously unstable & I thought it was time for him to check into reality. Never pleasant, but his illness was aggravating my own. I hope they can elp him, because I've finally forgiving myself for being unable to. My life is highly toxic, and that leads back to ifs it my fault, or beyond my control? I'm not even sure there's a difinitive answer. Just a maddening riddle with no meaning.

[healingme4me]

Well, he can be angry all he wants. Sounds like you did, the right thing there And it also, speaks volumes to your having integrity in your marriage.

[not quite right]

H

Originally Posted by healingme4me

Well, he can be angry all he wants. Sounds like you did, the right thing there And it also, speaks volumes to your having integrity in your marriage.

well, he's home now & grateful that he finally has gotten the help he's needed. I hope he stays on the aftercare plans & medication regimen. I just want us to be well together. I guess that means I have to get well myself. What a long road to start down. Suppose the sooner I.start , the faster I'll reach my destination.