[sadams1066]

I am having a terrible time related to my 19yo daughter and her 34yo unemployed and on-probation bf. Everytime I think of her being with him, especially overnight at his mother's house or at another friends I start to feel physically unwell. I can't breathe, I'm shaky, my legs are weak and wobbly, I can't eat; it feels like my skin is on fire and my cells are melting.
I have had depression since forever, but never felt like this before. Well, sometimes for short situational periods if I had something bad going on, but never like this. I feel like I need to have her where I can see her and I can't stop obsessing about her being with him. I feel like a total maniac, but I can't stop it. My GP has changed my med from ant-depressant to Risperidone and I'm worried about the possible side-effects and it just seems like I should somehow be able to get a grip. I have been trying to find a therapist to try and unravel this, ut I'm not having much luck. I HATE how I feel when this comes on and it is beginning to impact my work and I just want it to stop. I've tried all the adjunctive therapies I know; meditating, exercising,etc and they help for a short period then I'm right back to this terrible, itchy, screaming feeling. Plus, I've started raging, which is something I thought only my father and autistic son did. I'm scaring myself and saying really hard things and I'm afraid I'm going to lose my daughter if this doesn't stop soon. I just don't know what else to do.

[gimmeice]

Hello sadams1066, it's nice to meet you, welcome to psych central.
Do you have any hobbies? Sometimes getting involved in hobbies helps take things off your mind and it can be very relaxing. In times of great stress we need to treat ourselves well by doing things that we enjoy. Keep trying to find a therapist, it really may help you.

[sadams1066]

Originally Posted by gimmeice

Hello sadams1066, it's nice to meet you, welcome to psych central.
Do you have any hobbies? Sometimes getting involved in hobbies helps take things off your mind and it can be very relaxing. In times of great stress we need to treat ourselves well by doing things that we enjoy. Keep trying to find a therapist, it really may help you.

Thank you. I do have some interests outside of stalking my daughter,lol. I am finding, however, that I don't have much interest in them. I can't even settle down to read and I love to read! This insanity has completely disrupted my life; I am not accustomed to having so little control over my emotions or thoughts and I DO NOT like it. Today I feel much better and I am sure 'this too shall pass'. I am trying to reach out for help now instead of being the one who 'needs no help' and helps all who ask, y'know?