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Old Apr 22, 2010, 05:57 AM
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trance trance is offline
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I just tried to go to work...I was physically shaking like a leaf and my insides feel like mush like I wanna puke...I almost got there and these voices keep telling me that I wont make it that everyone is going to know what a ****ing loser I am the drugs I take are supposed to help with this sort of thing they dont and now I am sitting here persecuting myself for being JUST LAZY...my girlfriend is a very understanding person but she has been carrying me for almost 2 years now and still she loves me I hate when I let her down I hate me totally am I just being lazy or am I really crazy...I just want to ???

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  #2  
Old Apr 22, 2010, 07:52 AM
TheByzantine
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trance, are you getting professional help?
  #3  
Old Apr 22, 2010, 09:01 AM
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Lisa Michelle Lisa Michelle is offline
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It's not about being lazy, it's the anxiety.
How long have you been on your current meds? Could it be that they haven't kicked in yet? Or maybe if they're not working you could try some different ones?

What's worrying you about work right now? Could you take some time off?
  #4  
Old Apr 23, 2010, 06:38 AM
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feary feary is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trance View Post
I just tried to go to work...I was physically shaking like a leaf and my insides feel like mush like I wanna puke...I almost got there and these voices keep telling me that I wont make it that everyone is going to know what a ****ing loser I am the drugs I take are supposed to help with this sort of thing they dont and now I am sitting here persecuting myself for being JUST LAZY...my girlfriend is a very understanding person but she has been carrying me for almost 2 years now and still she loves me I hate when I let her down I hate me totally am I just being lazy or am I really crazy...I just want to ???
I know how that feels. I HATE it. It's like there is a physical force preventing you from moving forward or doing anything no matter how much you want to.

I also started new meds so I am praying that they start to work at least a little.

You'll be fine. What are you on?

All the best to you.
  #5  
Old Apr 23, 2010, 02:30 PM
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Jewels Jewels is offline
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How long have you been on your meds? And are they for anxiety disorder/panic disorder or for something different? You said you have voices telling you things...I can understand the fear of going to work and feeling like everybody is looking at you like you are crazy...and you just panic and go home without working...I got put on Xanax for the panic attacks and it helps me immensely...now I don't have those panic attacks any longer...I still am unable to work, but thankfully do not have the panic attacks in such intensity that I did before I was on the Xanax. I hope that your meds start working for you soon. If not, be sure and tell your dr so he/she can address the issues with a different med. Be aware that sometimes it takes a few trials of medicines to find the ones that work for you. I hope things clear up soon for you.

Jewels
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True love exists when we lose ourselves to invest in the care of others.
  #6  
Old Apr 25, 2010, 07:33 AM
TheByzantine
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How are you doing, trance?
  #7  
Old Apr 25, 2010, 08:37 AM
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Hippie Hippie is offline
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((((trance)))) are you seeing a therapist or just your pdoc?
  #8  
Old Apr 25, 2010, 08:50 AM
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ECHOES ECHOES is offline
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Anxiety is fear. There was something stirring up some fear in you, that you may or may not be aware of. Thoughts about being at work, interracting with people you work with, getting to your place of work, being at work, leaving your home, or something similr.
I hope you are able to see a therapist who can help you with the anxiety events that are orchestrated by your thoughts. There is so much to learn about you, about what it is that can so interfere with what you want in life, with the kind of person you want to be.

How have you been since you posted?
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