[Myzen]

Hi folks,

We all share our experiences of panic and anxiety here at PC, but I have been wondering how many of us have witnessed another person having an attack, and how that has felt for us.

I think that for people who don't suffer from the illness, even witnessing another person having an attack won't mean very much. I have seen only two people in my life who I know were suffering anxiety attacks and it was a truly horrible thing to see, like I was looking at raw suffering.

The most moving was a TV programme about a lady who was trying to come off old fashioned opiate tranquillisers. I won't describe it, as it might be upsetting to you folks, but I have to say that I am sure I knew how she was feeling. I recognised her body language in my own. Watching that programme I knew exactly what empathy is all about.

Anyone else had this experience?

Cheers, M

[Sabrina]

When I was in a psychiatric hospital, I witnessed a number of other patients having attacks. It is frightening and painful to see. I tend to agree that for a person who does not suffer from the illness, that witnessing the attack doesn't mean much (I think of my husband here - he seems to think I am "acting").

Yes, seeing another suffer certainly draws empathy from me.

[lavendersteph]

i have never seen someone else have a panic attack but i had a mild one last night even the mild ones are terrifing i hate feeling anxious all the time it's exuasting and i just want peace and normality i wonder if i am to hard on myself but when u suffer u tend to do that

[Myzen]

Hi Lavender,

So sorry that you are feeling it just now. There are strategies that we can use, and I find that it gets easier over time.

Good thoughts, M

[Myzen]

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Sabrina0805 said:
When I was in a psychiatric hospital, I witnessed a number of other patients having attacks. It is frightening and painful to see. I tend to agree that for a person who does not suffer from the illness, that witnessing the attack doesn't mean much (I think of my husband here - he seems to think I am "acting").

Yes, seeing another suffer certainly draws empathy from me.

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Sabrina,

I used to get the 'acting' thing from my wife too. I think this is a very common reaction, and it's not helpful at all. I learned to cover up my attacks, but that isn't the way to go IMHO, it's much better to be open about what you're feeling.

Denial goes very deep, but I think it needs to be challenged, both at a personal level and at a society level.

I'm very interested in this idea that once we have experienced something we can spot it in others; this is a sense that seems to get sharper as I get older too. Maybe I keep my eyes open a bit more, and don't just think about 'me' all the time.

Good thoughts. M

[Sabrina]

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Myzen said:
I'm very interested in this idea that once we have experienced something we can spot it in others;

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Years ago I would never have noticed depression in another person's eyes. I was amongst thousands and thousands of people at a concert a couple of weeks ago and I must say that one of the more profound things I noticed was the pain in so many people's eyes.

[lavendersteph]

im sure ppl see it in my eyes whenever i was at work someone would always come up to me and say is somthing wrong even when i was fine i guess i have saddness in my eyes i dunno

[katheryn]

i didnt know what a panic/ anxitety attack was untill my hubby started having them his very from what situation hes dealing with from going pale to phisycialy being sick i watch him and know how much pain hes in as i suffer also with depression but i dont get a lot of panic attacks mainly i break out into sweats when im nervous or anxious

[Lexicon78]

Although I'm sure people who have seen me in a panic attack have been very concerned for me, but the thing that comes to mind for me is this one woman I met while in partial at one time.

This woman had them so bad that every time she had a panic attack (which was several times a day) she completely passed out cold! Just imagining how bad they must've been for her...I just can't imagine it, I guess.

I think the worst my panic attacks have been is when afterwards my body would kind of convulse...every limb in my body would jerk violently and I couldn't control it at all...thank god those episodes are over with.

My experience of witnessing others in panic/anxiety attacks is not from tv and movies.

In real life I run a support group for women survivors of child sexual abuse. Not a meeting or phone call with and from these terrific, strong women goes byt without someone (including myself here) having to deal with a panic anxiety attack.

In the group the way we handle this is the person who is experiencing the panic anxiety attacks lets others in the group know what they need.

If that person does not say anything about what is going on with them and why they got triggered we continue by staying on track of the activity or discussion going on already.

The reason we do it this way is because different people handle their panic/anxiety feelings in different ways.

Sometimes turning the focus off the topics and activites and on to the person experiencing the panic/anxiety attack will embarrass that person which will make the situation even worse.

I have also found that with running such groups theres always that one that realizes a panic attack can divert others off of the uncomfortable topic being discussed and then the group is "held captive" of being the panic attack persons audiance".

This kind of behavior serves its purpose in that the person does not want to discuss that topic but they want the attention of remaining in the group and having everthing center upon them.

Instead of finding our group to help themselves by taking care of their own problems these type people create problems for attention and so forth.

Yes there may be a perfectly good reason such as being abused as a child behind this behavior but this kind of behaviior is abusive to others in that they are are once again being held captive without their permission to another persons own thrills and problems, which is what our abusers did to us.

It also prevents others from accomplishing their own goals of helping themselves to heal and have a better life.

Therefore in our group we have set guidlines that if a panic attack is past the point of where grounding exercises do not work and lasts more than a three minutes (which is a long time if you have ever actually timed a panic anxiety attack and or experienced one) that person must leave the group and contact their treatment professional or other support person that can spend the unlimited time of getting that panic anxiety attack under control.

Panic anxiety attacks that last indefinately and cannot be controlled by grounding relaxation techniques need the help of treatment professionals. We are not practicing therapists while attending this group and only the persons treatment providor should handle such situations of this magnatude, for then the situation is most likely a medication need or change type problem.

Having this type of protocal in our real life group has cut the panic attacks down and the person with the panic attack is following what the group was meant for - Helping Ourselves Through Personal Empowerment.

At this group we help ourselves by challenging ourselves to locate activities, techniques and community resourses that we can use ourselves to help ourselves to heal. We are there to help ourselves not perpetrate more abuse by creating situations where the group is held captive to another persons need for problems and chaos for attention.

I weed out a majority of those that are there mainly for the attention and someone to take care of me attitudes by meeting individually filling in an emergency contact list for them to use should they have a problem like this during group and I also do some activities from the text and workbook called The Courage to Heal by Laura Davis with them to get a feel of how ready they are to stay focused on contributing and doing the activites without turning them into attention seeking take care of me situations.

Occasionally though someone like this gets past me but once in the group and they see that all in the group remain focused on that task at hand of taking care of themselves and letting and expecting others to do the same and remaining on the activities that person who is being counter productive to themselves ends up leaving the group after a couple sessions.

I actually took this idea of protocal from the therapist idea that therapy is what you put into it. A support group works the same way those that are open minded and give it their all will progress and have a great group experience and those that don't - stay stuck in the rut and have not so good group experiences.

The same with panic attacks you can't help someone who doesn't want the help and doesn't try to help themselves.

[Myzen]

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Lexicon78 said:
I think the worst my panic attacks have been is when afterwards my body would kind of convulse...every limb in my body would jerk violently and I couldn't control it at all...thank god those episodes are over with.

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Hi Lex,

I'm glad you said that. I have only had a few attacks of this magnitude. After the first wave, which usually includes vomiting and then a period of dry retching, I have the shaking limbs as you say. It's really weird, like a kind of involuntary shivering. For me, this is a good sign as I start to feel better, and more peaceful after the shaking. It's worse for me if the shaking doesn't come.

The famous Russian 19c writer Nikolai Gogol suffered from this illness, and it is said that he had to walk up to 20 miles after having an attack to try to reduce the anxiety.

I used to have to walk, but more recently I have been able to tough it out in my bedroom, which I regard as a victory.

Good thoughts, M

[Myzen]

Hi myself,

I think I understand what your saying.

For me, I have always managed to take my attacks alone; maybe it's a 'man' thing, I don't know.

If I am with someone I make a quick excuse and get into the street, or go into my room. I often end up in alleyways for some reason.

I don't know why, but when I am in that state being with someone else is worse than useless. I don't like people seeing me in that situation so I get clear of them.

My first attack happened in an exam room. I left the exam room and asked the nurse lady for an aspirin. I didn't know what the hell was happening to me. While her back was turned I sneaked out and got to the pavement before I was sick. I can't remember how I got home.

This is the strangest thing. When I got back near my parents house I didn't go into the house. Instead I went down to the fields where I used to hang out and squatted under a bush. I guess I was like a sick cat, hiding myself away from people.

When I felt a little better I went home, but I didn't say anything to my mother. Instinctively I knew that what I had was beyond her. Next day I went to the doctor, again without telling, and he said that I was 'histrionic'. That was when hell began for me.

It's been a long haul, 40 years since that first one, and I still take my attacks the same way.

Good thoughts, M

PS - Good grief, maybe I should be celebrating the anniversaries! LOL