[CharactorAssassin]

I have a feeling I am sick because my older sister judges and humiliates me consistently. It is almost as if she is waiting to do it to me for the sake of having power over me. Often over money. She seems to need the upper hand. I observe her and her husband as aggressively shaming their children. At times this aggression seems to boil over. It seems as long as I know her I will never be able to live.

[CharactorAssassin]

Children of a difficult, more stubborn temperament defend against being supportive of others in the house. They observe how the selfish parents get his needs met by others. They learn how manipulation and using guilt gets the parent what he or she wants. They develop a false self and use aggression and intimidation to get their way. These children grow up to be Narcissistic themselves.[13]

The sensitive, guilt-ridden children in the family learn to meet the parent’s needs for gratification and try to get love by accommodating the whims and wishes of the parent. The child’s normal feelings are ignored, denied and eventually repressed in attempts to gain the parent’s “love.” Guilt and shame keep the child locked into this developmental arrest. Their aggressive impulses become split off and are not integrated with normal development. These children grow up learning to give too much and develop a false self of becoming co-dependent in their relationships.[13]