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  #1  
Old Apr 24, 2013, 02:24 PM
purplemystery's Avatar
purplemystery purplemystery is offline
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I am experiencing a problem within my friendships that I know is somewhat due to my anxiety, and I'm wondering if others have experienced a similar thing because it has been bothering me so much lately.

Throughout my life, I have always been the third or fifth wheel. In those unequal dynamics, I never fare well, and I know it's because I'm generally pretty quiet. I'm a college student and I often hang around 2 friends (let's call them K and L), 1 of which is my roommate (L). I have been friends with them for 3 years, and I know that they like me and are not trying to exclude me. But whenever K is telling a story, she will only look at L. It makes me feel as though I'm not even a part in the conversation, though I do my best to say things and to contribute anyway. Or sometimes she'll be like "L, I have to tell you this story." It hurts my feelings so much because I am quite obviously not as important to her. I don't think she is even realizing that she is doing it, but that's the worst part: I guess I am that invisible to her. Obviously she feels that she gets the most social benefit when she pays attention to how L is responding to her stories, not me. I feel like I have nothing to offer.

I am just ranting, and I know that it is my "fault" because I find it very hard to show emotion and show my true self. So maybe they just think I'm not as fun. This problem of being somehow an outsider is something that I consistently deal with in my friendships, so obviously it has to do with me. But it feels like a knife to the heart and I get really upset when K and L act closer with each other because I feel like I am not valued as much since I am quiet.
Hugs from:
Odee

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  #2  
Old Apr 24, 2013, 03:12 PM
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CharactorAssassin CharactorAssassin is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2013
Posts: 446
It was that way with me in friendships. I attributed it to my friends charisma and social skills which I no longer have. Just accept that you have a different personality type that brings you together. No need to be envious because you are more of a thinker and observer. I hope that makes sense
  #3  
Old Apr 24, 2013, 07:09 PM
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Odee Odee is offline
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How are you about making eye contact?
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Depression, Anxiety, Panic. Med free.
  #4  
Old Apr 27, 2013, 10:30 PM
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Cocosurviving Cocosurviving is offline
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I hate this happened to you and hope you
can resolve it.

Stay strong
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