[volatile]

I know I need professional help.

I recently met someone and I've basically been swept away with them. They want me to stay with them a lot and travel with them. I have no problem with that but my anxiety is soooo bad!!! I have ocd like tendencies, hyper sensitivity to rejection with general anxiety and agoraphobia so anything outside of my comfort place is very stressful for me though I'm getting better the more I learn nothing bad is going to happen.... I just get so frustrated. I used to never be this way! I used to go places all the time, new places with new people and meet new people and I was capable of handling it.
It's just so many bad things have happened to me I feel like I'm retarded or something for not being able to just bounce back to how I used to be, easy going. I'm just a nervous mouse ready to die at the smallest thing.
I just hope if I force myself to go through these horribly anxious inducing things then I will be okay. omg I want to be okay. I don't want all this horrible fear to be for nothing.
I'm just so sick of being afraid

I just don't know what to do. I guess I'm doing the best i can. I try to use grounding techniques but it doesn't seem to be helping much though I guess I wouldn't be able to tell anyway since I use them as much as I can. I just feel like a big baby.
anyways I just wanted to share this. hope everyone else is doing better than me.

[dthalez]

I know how you feel, I used to be this outgoing girl who loved to go out and do whatever without a fear in my mind. Then all of a sudden one day, everything just changed for me. I have to take a benzo just to get through the day. It sucks that I have to take a pill just to be functional and normal.

[Bill3]

I know I need professional help.

Are you able to get some professional help?

[volatile]

Originally Posted by Bill3

Are you able to get some professional help?

I was seeing a therapist but she made my depression very bad and was not helping me at all. I've tried to ask my doctor for anxiety meds but she refused to help me and referred me to a pdoc that was not helpful at all for me in the past. I feel kind of stuck :/ I have a lot of resources around here I just have to look harder I guess.