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Old Nov 25, 2006, 04:52 PM
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Rio_ Rio_ is offline
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I had my sixth driving lesson today, and it didn't go very well. I kept changing into fourth gear instead of second, which meant I stalled quite a few times coming out of roundabouts. I guess that might have been upsetting for a lot of people, but when I got back home I ended up crying in my room for over half an hour about it - I managed to convince myself that I was a terrible driver, and my instructor and a lot of other drivers must be really annoyed at me. My parents kept telling me that it was no big deal and they were sure sure people didn't mind - they were all learners once, too - but I wouldn't believe them. Is this normal? How did I manage to go from "that lesson didn't go too well" to "I'm a terrible driver" so quickly? Is this anxiety  or low self-esteem? Or neither? I got diagnosed with social anxiety recently, and the fact that I was worried so much about what other drivers must be thinking of me makes me wonder if that was part of it.

Is this anxiety  or low self-esteem? Or neither?
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  #2  
Old Nov 25, 2006, 05:37 PM
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Perna Perna is offline
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A little of both? It's very hard, learning to drive. Right now you may not be a great driver but that's because you're just learning. It does take all that practice and more.

I can see crying if I have a bad day at anything, nevermind something difficult that isn't going well at the moment. I don't think that's bad or inappropriate. I often cry when I'm frustrated or frightened!

Hang in there, Rio, it will get better. My father helped me learn to drive, drove me through the neighborhood to the school parking lot then let me "drive" around the parking lot. After a couple lessons like that my stepmother took me out and had me drive on fast, winding country roads and major arteries! That was super scary! Roundabouts are very hard; we have a lot of them in Washington, D.C. too and I use to dread them when I lived there, even after I'd been driving a long time (since 1967).
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  #3  
Old Nov 25, 2006, 05:44 PM
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Thanks, Perna. Learning to drive is hard - much harder than I thought it would be. People make it look so easy!

Surely crying for that long is over-reacting a little, though? Is this anxiety  or low self-esteem? Or neither? Even now I haven't calmed down completely, and my lesson was 8 hours ago. Is this anxiety  or low self-esteem? Or neither?

(I know this is Is this anxiety  or low self-esteem? Or neither?, but...you have roundabouts in North America? I didn't think there were any - when dad came here from Canada, he had to take his test again and wasn't used to roundabouts at all.)
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  #4  
Old Nov 25, 2006, 06:02 PM
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Perna Perna is offline
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Yes, we have roundabouts in the U.S. -- especially in Washington, D.C. which was designed by the Frenchman L'Enfant. http://www.cr.nps.gov/nr/Travel/wash/lenfant.htm

LOL, you know how those Frenchmen have to have roundabouts to control the "mobs" with grapeshot. We have long "radiating" avenues that have them every so many miles. Our most famous is Dupont Circle: http://www.aaccessmaps.com/show/map/dupontcircle

Look at these pictures, Washington has the "older" circles, very complicated with multiple lanes going all which way and stoplights, etc. Almost as bad as Paris and Rome I think :-) http://www.iihs.org/research/qanda/roundabouts.html

I just hope you aren't too scared next time you go out. The crying helps I think, gets it all out of one's system :-)
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  #5  
Old Nov 25, 2006, 06:09 PM
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Rio_ Rio_ is offline
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Wow, thanks for all the information! Is this anxiety  or low self-esteem? Or neither? I've hardly been to any places in America - just Washington, Oregon and a very short time in California - so I don't know much about it.

Thanks, I hope not either. My lesson was at quite a busy part of the day today - it's usually earlier in the morning, when the roads are quieter - which probably didn't help! That's true. Is this anxiety  or low self-esteem? Or neither?
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  #6  
Old Nov 25, 2006, 06:33 PM
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Perna Perna is offline
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That's neat. I was just taking Pacific Northwest history (Washington, Oregon, Idaho) and I've lived in California, the San Francisco area and Southern California, down by Los Angeles and San Diego. I haven't been to the UK since 1968 (other than plane stopovers at Heathrow) and then it was only London. My husband's great grandfather brought his wife and family over from Scotland, he was born there but his older siblings and both parents were from Ireland so my husband's not very "Scottish." His last name begins with McP and his grandfather said it wasn't MacP because, being Scottish, "That would be a waste of a perfectly good "A" :-) But turns out he was only born in Scotland, passing through from Ireland to America :-)
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