[SalemTyrannus]

Hello everyone, this will be my first post. I have long suffered from of CD and general anxiety disorder. I am currently taking Klonopin and Lexapro to manage my symptoms. I am through with college, and it has come to my attention that my anxiety and mental state are happy drawbacks my job pursuits. I was recently the teacher in Thailand for about a year. Siding eventually got the best and I came to the conclusion that I would either need to leave Thailand and teaching or commit suicide--I chose to leave. Why was I so anxious? It wasn't the subject matter (I graduated Magna Cum Laude), rather, I was deathly afraid of punishing my students, and so I lost control of my classes quite easily. More recently I have returned to the USA and tried working at a credit card claims call center. Once again my anxiety flared up. I knew everything… How about claims, credit cards, and what decisions to make based on the request I was city. It was one stitch though. Sometimes a claim has to be denied, and that makes people upset and unhappy. I am so afraid of making people upset or uncomfortable that I began filing claims that had no business being filed. Sure they were denied later by the bank investigators, but my anxiety was causing extra work for the investigators, and extra frustration for the customers. Eventually I couldn't take the stress anymore and I walked out, came back later to return my badge and headset and I never returned. I am currently unemployed. What is wrong with me?

[Travelinglady]

Hi, SalemTyrannus, and welcome to Psych Central! I can identify with what you are saying. I used to have low self-esteem and came from a background where I was expected to be perfect, so I got yelled at a lot and emotionally abused. I don't know if you can relate to any of these situations or not. At any rate, I hated to confront people and for folks to get mad at me.

I have found therapy to be very helpful in giving me the ability to deal with "negative emotions," so I suggest you try that, too.