Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 04:21 PM
Pink3032's Avatar
Pink3032 Pink3032 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 61
Ok this is a dumb question but i figured i would ask anyway.
Has anxiety ever interfered with friendship or relationship. The past couple of months have been rough for me with my anxiety. Sometimes when my friends would call i wouldnt be in the mood to hear them talk their problem or i wouldn't call them for weeks.some people got offended by me doing this.These friends know that i deal with anxiety issues sometimes but one friend said that its not an excuse to not talk to anyone. Can anyone relate to this issue.
Hugs from:
Hound

advertisement
  #2  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 04:42 PM
httpshay's Avatar
httpshay httpshay is offline
New Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: Ireland
Posts: 4
My friends are really outgoing people, and they are the kind of friends that want you to listen to their problems but don't want to hear about mine.
Sometimes if they have ignored me or not invited me somewhere it makes me seriously anxious about talking to them again for a while, they also say that about my problems aren't an excuse to not talk to them but sometimes I just can't listen to them drone about their issues that aren't really issues when I can't get my own head in order.
I understand where you are coming from, I really like sometimes you do need to just keep time for yourself or you might end up feeling worse.
x
  #3  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 05:06 PM
Anonymous100305
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
My anxiety & depression, along with other issues, have caused me to essentially withdraw from life in general. In the literature, it's sometimes referred to as: "social suicide". I like to refer to myself as an "urban hermit".
  #4  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 05:27 PM
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,637
__________________
  #5  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 05:32 PM
Anonymous37842
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
First of all your question isn't dumb ...

It's very difficult for me to form close relationships, and yes, sadly, I've had many friendships to fade along the way.

There are those that do understand and those that don't understand that sometimes it is all we can do to take care of ourselves.

It certainly isn't kind for any of them (understanding or not) to try and guilt trip us into taking on more than we feel we're capable of handling at any given point in time.

While I regret some of the friendships that fell apart along the way, I understand the how and why of it and don't wish any ill will towards anybody, most of all myself.

I'm doing the best I can.

  #6  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 07:19 PM
NerveWracked NerveWracked is offline
Junior Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: Ohio
Posts: 11
Your question definitely isn't dumb . . . my boyfriend proposed to me for Christmas and I'm not ready and wasn't expecting it and had a total panic attack and have been anxious/upset all week. Going to see him again this weekend and I have no idea what to say or do. Don't even know what I feel . . . I think anxiety always affects relationships . . .
  #7  
Old Dec 31, 2014, 11:56 PM
lkbun14 lkbun14 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: Away
Posts: 42
Anxiety has definitely affected my friendships and relationships, especially in the last couple of years. I've tended to keep more to myself, rather than want to always socialize. Your question isn't dumb at all, I can see a difference in my being able to relate to others depending on how anxious I'm feeling. I'm trying to be more aware of this and try and push myself to do more. The more I keep my anxiety down, the more I feel like my "old self" when I'm with my family and friends.
  #8  
Old Jan 01, 2015, 12:45 AM
CosmicRose's Avatar
CosmicRose CosmicRose is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Sep 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 1,026
Yes I've broken up with people because of my anxiety and I haven't maintained friendships because of it sometimes too.
Your friend should be more understanding and not reprimand you for needing space. But it just shows you how much you mean to her if she wanted to talk to you so badly and you weren't answering your phone.
Its okay to need space sometimes. Lots of people, as they get older, end up not having many friends because work or family life takes over instead. I don't know of many older people who have active social lives, I could be wrong here...but its just something that happens with age anyway. Now being younger, of course your friends might hound you more to hang out or call, but you should never feel obligated or pushed to do something.
Do whatever feels right to you in the moment.
__________________
"Re-examine all you have been told, dismiss what insults your soul." - Walt Whitman

"Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity. The grave will supply plenty of time for silence." - Christopher Hitchens

"I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience." - Mark Twain
Thanks for this!
Pink3032
  #9  
Old Jan 01, 2015, 01:23 AM
Hound's Avatar
Hound Hound is offline
Junior Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 22
Absolutely, you're not alone. My anxiety has caused me irrational worries that led to me ending a relationship this past summer. Fortunately they understood, forgave me, and after a few weeks we began our relationship again.
  #10  
Old Jan 01, 2015, 09:35 AM
Anonymous32451
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
with friendships, sure.

especially when things can't be done the normal way or something like that
Hugs from:
Pink3032
  #11  
Old Jan 01, 2015, 12:13 PM
Pink3032's Avatar
Pink3032 Pink3032 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 61
This kinda anxiety is normal.Its a good thing.You proably is just overwhelmed by not being ready to get married that you paniced.Just tell him how much you love him and tell him that your not ready .He should understand where u coming from
  #12  
Old Jan 01, 2015, 12:50 PM
Lizi18 Lizi18 is offline
Junior Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: England
Posts: 14
Your question is far from dumb. I had a close friend who withdrew from me due to depression. She never admitted it but as I knew she had suffered from depression prior to her cutting contact I figured that's what it was. When she got back to me, she denied it and just stated that's what she "does" sometimes, she tends to feel "suffocated" and It confuses her also. She likes to save face but at the time I believed her excuse and got angry with her because It was at a time I thought I needed her the most. That, I regret as a few few months later after dealing with depression for a while I became significantly worse had the same types of feelings she had explained to me. I had no desire to speak to or be with friends and I always socially withdrew without explanation. My friend and I don't speak anymore and we were very close and I miss her very much so I think It's safe to say that depression can cause a change in friendships/relationships
  #13  
Old Jan 01, 2015, 01:05 PM
Werewoman's Avatar
Werewoman Werewoman is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: May 2014
Location: Betelgeuse
Posts: 1,472
A couple of days ago I was talking to my dad on the phone. He was put out with me because I didn't call him on Christmas. I told him I've been having a rough time of it lately and just didn't feel like talking to anyone, and it wasn't personal. He said he was proud and relieved that I admitted that.

Well, I've certainly never denied it, and I thought about telling him it was part of my PTSD and depression - that sometimes I just want to crawl under a rock and hide from the world when I'm having a bad day - but what would be the point? I'm 52 years old and have had these problems since I can remember so you would think at some point my loved ones (not just my dad, but my husband, siblings, etc.) would try to understand (impossible, I know, but a girl can dream) why I do what I do and that I have unbearable anxiety, but no one has ever asked or tried to educate themselves. I guess it's just easier for them to believe I'm just rude or whatever instead of believing there might actually be reasons I am the way I am that has nothing to do with them.

OK, pity party over.
__________________



You're only given one little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it. ~ Robin Williams

Did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage? ~ Pink Floyd
  #14  
Old Jan 01, 2015, 04:54 PM
CosmicRose's Avatar
CosmicRose CosmicRose is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Sep 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 1,026
Quote:
Originally Posted by Werewoman View Post
A couple of days ago I was talking to my dad on the phone. He was put out with me because I didn't call him on Christmas.
I wonder why parents assume the children are always supposed to call them on holidays and they don't call their kids on the holidays? This is something my mom makes me feel guilty for, yet she doesn't call me either?? My dad literally calls everyone (including my sister, his daughter) on christmas, he calls extended family on his side too. I don't really get why some parents think its the daughter or son's job to call them, when they could just as easily pick up the phone and call their kids instead?
__________________
"Re-examine all you have been told, dismiss what insults your soul." - Walt Whitman

"Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity. The grave will supply plenty of time for silence." - Christopher Hitchens

"I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience." - Mark Twain
  #15  
Old Jan 01, 2015, 06:18 PM
Weownthesky's Avatar
Weownthesky Weownthesky is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 86
I have social anxiety and I get anxious when I feel obligated to hang out with someone and I avoid texts and make up excuses to stay home and stuff. They all want to go on weekend trips and go to the bar and I'm like I'd rather not. I also have anxiety over booking days off.
__________________
We're only getting older.
  #16  
Old Jan 01, 2015, 08:37 PM
Werewoman's Avatar
Werewoman Werewoman is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: May 2014
Location: Betelgeuse
Posts: 1,472
Quote:
Originally Posted by CosmicRose View Post
I wonder why parents assume the children are always supposed to call them on holidays and they don't call their kids on the holidays? This is something my mom makes me feel guilty for, yet she doesn't call me either?? My dad literally calls everyone (including my sister, his daughter) on christmas, he calls extended family on his side too. I don't really get why some parents think its the daughter or son's job to call them, when they could just as easily pick up the phone and call their kids instead?
Apparently, they have no concept of the fact that telephones work both ways?
__________________



You're only given one little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it. ~ Robin Williams

Did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage? ~ Pink Floyd
Reply
Views: 2199

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 05:27 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.