Needless to say, he doesn't get my social anxiety or panic attacks, or my depression. This might sound trivial, but here is an example of stuff that he thinks I overreact to. BTW, he tends to be very stoic and he can control his emotions very well most of the time.

I'm a sensitive and emotional person which I hate as it make life so much harder than it already is. Well, he raised his voice to me earlier in regards to our cat. I took our cat to the vets today and I told him that they told me that it'd cost $670 to get some dental treatment done. He then told me if I paid them and that they're trying to rip us off, ugh!

I saw how bad my cats teeth were earlier! Well, he was to busy lecturing me to listen to me when I said that I set up a care credit plan, but that I didn't pay them that amount. I just told him that we can make monthly payments up to 6 months with no interest. He then kept on asking me if I paid them or not, ugh! I already said no 2 or 3 times, so I was starting to get upset and annoyed. I do get stressed out easily, and he tends to make a bad situation worse with his judgements.

Well, to make things worse, after I picked up my cat, I accidentally got into this woman's car with my cat since I wasn't paying attention. Our cars do look similar, lol. Thankfully she didn't freak out. Then when I came home, he was outside with our other cat with the door open. Before I got inside, the cat that just came back from the vets jumped out of the carrier. It's old and broken, so I'll have to get a new one for sure. I was scared that he'd run outside and run away!

My husband didn't do a thing to help! He blamed me for not putting down the carrier! What? I was startled, and most of us don't react to things right away when something catches us off guard, right? He's like a robot at times, ugh! He then told me that I "freak" out to much and that I need to work on that. He also denied raising his voice to me. So, did I overreact, or is he being an insensitive jerk? Our cat is a house cat btw, and he wouldn't last long on his own outside at all. I'd appreciate any feedback regarding this wether it's good or bad.

[sideblinded]

I see at least one big issue. You married a stoic, even tempered, non emotional man. You are very sensitive. This dynamic can be good where opposites attract or it can be the cause of many misunderstandings. Only you know which is true. Best wishes.

[A18793715]

I'm the same exact way and my boyfriend is the same way as your husband.

I don't know what to do either.

Originally Posted by sideblinded

I see at least one big issue. You married a stoic, even tempered, non emotional man. You are very sensitive. This dynamic can be good where opposites attract or it can be the cause of many misunderstandings. Only you know which is true. Best wishes.

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The dynamic can be good at times, and at other times, it's bad. Sometimes I feel like I married a robot, lol.

Originally Posted by A18793715

I'm the same exact way and my boyfriend is the same way as your husband.

I don't know what to do either.

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Sorry to hear that. It's tough living with men like them for sure!

[CosmicRose]

Originally Posted by Shy Introvert

Needless to say, he doesn't get my social anxiety or panic attacks, or my depression. This might sound trivial, but here is an example of stuff that he thinks I overreact to. BTW, he tends to be very stoic and he can control his emotions very well most of the time.

I'm a sensitive and emotional person which I hate as it make life so much harder than it already is. Well, he raised his voice to me earlier in regards to our cat. I took our cat to the vets today and I told him that they told me that it'd cost $670 to get some dental treatment done. He then told me if I paid them and that they're trying to rip us off, ugh!

I saw how bad my cats teeth were earlier! Well, he was to busy lecturing me to listen to me when I said that I set up a care credit plan, but that I didn't pay them that amount. I just told him that we can make monthly payments up to 6 months with no interest. He then kept on asking me if I paid them or not, ugh! I already said no 2 or 3 times, so I was starting to get upset and annoyed. I do get stressed out easily, and he tends to make a bad situation worse with his judgements.

Well, to make things worse, after I picked up my cat, I accidentally got into this woman's car with my cat since I wasn't paying attention. Our cars do look similar, lol. Thankfully she didn't freak out. Then when I came home, he was outside with our other cat with the door open. Before I got inside, the cat that just came back from the vets jumped out of the carrier. It's old and broken, so I'll have to get a new one for sure. I was scared that he'd run outside and run away!

My husband didn't do a thing to help! He blamed me for not putting down the carrier! What? I was startled, and most of us don't react to things right away when something catches us off guard, right? He's like a robot at times, ugh! He then told me that I "freak" out to much and that I need to work on that. He also denied raising his voice to me. So, did I overreact, or is he being an insensitive jerk? Our cat is a house cat btw, and he wouldn't last long on his own outside at all. I'd appreciate any feedback regarding this wether it's good or bad.

Just to add my two cents in here, I do agree that vets overcharge way too much and that they often find things "wrong" with pets just so they can get more money. I have several people in my family who worked at veterinary offices and after hearing the horror stories and the scams and the overcharging and flat out lying to customers about what their pets "need" done, I have to agree with your husband that a lot of times vets do this. $600 for dental care on a cat? I would be pissed too. But if you feel your cat really needs it and if you can afford it, then I guess go ahead with it...just be aware that many vets overcharge and they look for ANYTHING on your pet to charge you multiple hundreds of dollars for, sometimes even saying your animal "needs surgery" or "needs this medication" or "needs this or that" when really they can go without it...just my personal experience with those places.

Cosmic, yeah, I heard about stuff like that too and that's terrible! I do believe that my cat does need this dental work though as his teeth are in bad shape. They're yellow with lots of plaque, and there is inflammation there. So I'll have to pay for this secretly via money order.

So, what kind of horror stories have you heard about? What scams are you aware of, and what did your family members tell you? I'd like to know what to look out for.

[CosmicRose]

My sister who worked at a crooked vet's office, who heard the veterinarian openly discuss ways to bring more money in by upping procedures and charging more. She was in charge of the front desk and the clerical aspects, the veterinarian ran that place like any business and that included charging every customer as much as possible, telling them they needed x y and z done for their animal. This is common practice for vets from what I've heard others tell me and from my own personal experiences as well. I started catching on when every single time I brought my animals to the vet, they "needed" something else.
Nearly $700 for a cat's dental work honestly sounds like just another one of those situations. Cats tend to have plaque naturally since they don't brush their teeth like we do, they used to live in the wild and never once had a dental check up until humans came along. lol they don't naturally have white teeth or perfectly looking dental work, but I can definitely see how a vet would charge for that...

Edit - Now if your cat had an "impacted tooth" or a mouth infection or something equally serious, that's another thing. But plaque and inflammation? That does sound like a gimmick. Basically every animal has plaque, and inflammation simply means reddening of the gums which again is basically what every animal and lots of humans have as well.

[A18793715]

Even MD doctors jack up prices. For example, why does it cost $8,000-$9,000 for cash patients to get weight loss surgery but if you have insurance, they greatly increase their charge. They charged my insurance almost $90,000. My insurance almost didn't cover it. I was looking at the charges. For every pill they gave me, they charged almost $150. Which was many since I was in the hospital for 4-5 days. Blood panels cost almost $2,000. I couldn't believe how they could get away with charging insurance companies that much.

So I do believe a vet would do the same, especially for cosmetic.

Originally Posted by CosmicRose

My sister who worked at a crooked vet's office, who heard the veterinarian openly discuss ways to bring more money in by upping procedures and charging more. She was in charge of the front desk and the clerical aspects, the veterinarian ran that place like any business and that included charging every customer as much as possible, telling them they needed x y and z done for their animal. This is common practice for vets from what I've heard others tell me and from my own personal experiences as well. I started catching on when every single time I brought my animals to the vet, they "needed" something else.
Nearly $700 for a cat's dental work honestly sounds like just another one of those situations. Cats tend to have plaque naturally since they don't brush their teeth like we do, they used to live in the wild and never once had a dental check up until humans came along. lol they don't naturally have white teeth or perfectly looking dental work, but I can definitely see how a vet would charge for that...

Edit - Now if your cat had an "impacted tooth" or a mouth infection or something equally serious, that's another thing. But plaque and inflammation? That does sound like a gimmick. Basically every animal has plaque, and inflammation simply means reddening of the gums which again is basically what every animal and lots of humans have as well.

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Wow, that is outrageous! That should be illegal! OK, I just changed my mind now! You just saved me from making a huge and costly mistake, thanks!

Originally Posted by A18793715

Even MD doctors jack up prices. For example, why does it cost $8,000-$9,000 for cash patients to get weight loss surgery but if you have insurance, they greatly increase their charge. They charged my insurance almost $90,000. My insurance almost didn't cover it. I was looking at the charges. For every pill they gave me, they charged almost $150. Which was many since I was in the hospital for 4-5 days. Blood panels cost almost $2,000. I couldn't believe how they could get away with charging insurance companies that much.

So I do believe a vet would do the same, especially for cosmetic.

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Again, that's a crime, and it should be illegal too! Insurance in the U.S is overpriced, and it sucks too!

[CosmicRose]

Originally Posted by Shy Introvert

Wow, that is outrageous! That should be illegal! OK, I just changed my mind now! You just saved me from making a huge and costly mistake, thanks!

You're very welcome, glad I could save you from spending all that money. $700 for a teeth cleaning does sound outrageous. I wouldn't even spend that much money on my own mouth. If you are worried about your cat's teeth, all you need to do is go to your local pet store and buy something for his plaque, they have tons of different dental care products for cats at the pet store. You can buy cat toothpaste and it'll say "fights plaque and inflammation" on it, and you can buy a little cat toothbrush to brush it's teeth once a week or something, only when you feel the cat really needs it. There's also things like breath products so their breath smells better. They also have mouth sprays that take care of plaque and inflammation too.

I've had inflammation on and off for 3 years that I keep under control with really good toothpaste and frequent brushing, and I'm fine. Inflammation is actually a very common thing and tends to go away on its own with a little care and cleaning. Nothing that should cost $700 though!

[A18793715]

Agreed! ^^

And as for it being a crime, I agree as well. That's pretty much scamming.

Originally Posted by CosmicRose

You're very welcome, glad I could save you from spending all that money. $700 for a teeth cleaning does sound outrageous. I wouldn't even spend that much money on my own mouth. If you are worried about your cat's teeth, all you need to do is go to your local pet store and buy something for his plaque, they have tons of different dental care products for cats at the pet store. You can buy cat toothpaste and it'll say "fights plaque and inflammation" on it, and you can buy a little cat toothbrush to brush it's teeth once a week or something, only when you feel the cat really needs it. There's also things like breath products so their breath smells better. They also have mouth sprays that take care of plaque and inflammation too.

I've had inflammation on and off for 3 years that I keep under control with really good toothpaste and frequent brushing, and I'm fine. Inflammation is actually a very common thing and tends to go away on its own with a little care and cleaning. Nothing that should cost $700 though!

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Yeah, that is outrageous! If I had to pay that much for my own teeth, and I was in pain, I'd spend that much. Anyways, thanks again for the helpful advice! I'll look into that!