[mama_emma]

Hey all,

My name is Kelsey and I have anxiety. I get anxious when there is a lot of emotions that overwhelm me really bad. I am pretty good with it, I don't take any medications, but I still have my moments. But I find myself constantly battling commitment. I get really anxious when I'm talking to someone but when guys ask me out I get excited until I leave them or hang up and I start doubting myself. I personally want to change. I long to change. I wish I could just be in a relationship and just be happy and be committed. I want to be married and had more kids. I am a single parent and whats sad is I really wanted to change and try the whole relationship parenting. But he left me and sa to say is I was ok with it and expecting it. I know where it started from and it is still happening today. If anyone has advice of what to do next I kno therapy might be the way but even then I can't afford it.

[Perna]

Hey, Kelsey, welcome to PsychCentral (PC). Relationships are a great unknown, a learning experience, and I think a lot of us get anxious when thinking about starting a new one. What I do sometimes is think of it as an experiment, a one-time thing (the first date) and not let myself get carried away with the married and have children, etc.

Think of something you want to learn to do better (listen instead of talk, is one of my favorites for me, for example :-) and decide to practice it (and how to practice it) on the first date? Concentrating on a specific object or experience like that instead of what "it all means" can help keep my imagination and fears about the future in check. I like to practice learning about the other person and not interjecting so many of my own stories ("Oh! I had the exact same thing happen. . ." and I'm off :-) not getting so excited about myself and what I want to say can help soothe me too, as I'm putting the other person in the "hot seat" instead, LOL.