[PippaIsAlone]

HELLOOOOO EVERYONE !!

Firstly, I'd like to say, if you're a judgy James, do not, I repeat do not read on.

Today I decided to try a psychedelic drug. It's naturally occurring. You can guess what it is. Point is, something interesting happened to me. I'm at the lowest point of my life. I got raped last week, I'm broke, homeless (currently on an acquaintance's couch. She can't let me stay another day though). My mother called the cops on me so I now have a criminal record and I keep having flashbacks of the abuse I've suffered at her Narcissistic hands. But today, I took a positive step towards understanding why life is the way it is. I'm by no means a ******* spiritualist or whatever. Also not endorsing using drugs. In fact, just don't. I'm talking about my experience right now !!!

My mother almost ruined my life. Anxiety did the same. But this time, I think I kind of won? Or at least temporarily.........

Ok back to the story. I am, or was, trying to figure my life out.



I took the "drug" (btw I don't agree with that term, but that's another story for another day lol) I fell onto my side. I could see everything around me and the energy running through it, as if it was a conveyor belt of time. I felt as if I knew it all so well, and that I was being let back into the spiritual world where all my old friends were. I felt as if all matter around me contained constantly travelling spirit and I knew the spirits better than anyone I knew in my life, and they were welcoming me back. I felt like THIS was the reality, and life was the illusion, a dream that we enter after eternity spent as spirit. I can't help but wonder if this is how it feels to die. As the trip started to subside, I felt as if I was an astronaut that had just landed on the planet for the first time, and I felt intensely aware that I was simply a man standing on a smallish planet, in a giant universe. I saw the world around me afresh. It felt as if I had been cleansed, reborn even. Since then, even thinking of the experience can sometimes bring a tear to my eye. It was just so intensely beautiful. I am not a spiritual person, and had been atheist for all my life before this trip. After-woulds I realized that whether God exists or not is merely a question of language and what you define as God. 'God' is simply a word, and the truth is far too profound, complex and beautiful to be encapsulated at all. I also realised that life is a lot more rich than I think. I have much to learn from the earth and everyone around me. I don't need to worry so much, but when I do I know it is something I am working on and it is getting better. I feel slightly better. Not worried about controling myself, I'm more interested in learning what truly makes me, me. Beyond this anxiety ********!!!

[ManOfConstantSorrow]

Great post. Slightly worried for you though.

[Writer82]

Pippa, I don't judge you in the least. Actually, medical science is revisiting psychedelics and their medical applications regarding certain mental disorders. With medical marijuana gaining popularity, other once taboo drugs are getting revisited as well. Do be careful with anything you do, natural substance or not. I am glad you came to a new state of mind and understanding as a result. I hope everything works out for you, and I wish you the best.

You can actually search for articles based on the medical research regarding psychedelics and their medical applications.

[ComfortablyNumb5]

Hmmm well I'm just glad your experience was good and that you feel good right now. And I'm sorry for the ****** situation you're in with being violated and nowhere to stay. Stay positive!



I don't get msgs unless the other person using tapatalk app!

[madmartigan11]

isnt that the point of drugs, they take you to a place of happiness or fear in yourconsciousness, but its escapism, its not real.