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ComfortablyNumb5
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Default Oct 14, 2016 at 03:00 AM
  #1
I have many important, stressful, possibly life changing stuff going on in my life right now that is causing my anxiety to get bad. My big thing is the phone. I keep my phone on silent and face down because I'm scared to get more bad news or threatening texts from my dad. My issues right now revolve around finances and possibly losing my house. I'm bipolar and cannot work and I need to call my attorney for SSI but I'm afraid to call and possibly get bad news. I have money from my mom that passed and my grandma has control of the trust. I need to speak to her to get money to save my house but I'm scared she's going to go off on me for getting in this situation. I just cannot get myself to make these phone calls. When I do talk on the phone I pace the room. I talked to my therapist and she said by the next visit (two weeks from now), I better of made these calls. She even tried to get me to call from her office.

I don't know what to do. Does anyone else have a phobia of talking on the phone? What helps!? I'm going nuts over here.
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Default Oct 14, 2016 at 05:27 AM
  #2
I'm the same, even for ordinary phone calls. I try and bribe myself with nice things to do after I make all my calls, and set aside a time specifically for it. When I was going through a lot of life events and had the similar situation of having to make lots of calls I didn't want, I did it gradually. So I rang an automated service (thing that tells you the time), just to get used to calling. Then a nearby store just to ask their opening hours. Then a really good friend for a chat. And then I started with my business calls. It was still hard but not as bad as I feared. Just getting some of the stuff I needed to start doing was such a good feeling (back in control of my life) that helped too. Good luck, I know this isn't easy!
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Default Oct 14, 2016 at 08:39 AM
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Oh my goodness, I have a phone phobia too. It's a real struggle and very intense. I procrastinate on phone calls...sometimes I even go places in person just to avoid talking over the phone, even though its an inconvenience. I'll drive half an hour to talk to a manager in person to avoid a phone call. Sometimes I do deep, calm breathing...10 breaths, like counting to ten to calm my body down. I rehearse what I'm going to say or write it down. They say desensitization helps...and it does to some degree, but no matter how many times I make a call to my mental health clinic I still get tightness in my chest and rapid heartbeat. Even though I've actually called them hundreds of times. Its one of those things that never entirely goes away. But the more you do it, the more you can tell yourself it will be okay no matter how anxious you feel, because you have enough experiences where everything worked out fine.
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Default Oct 14, 2016 at 08:45 AM
  #4
I do. I am months over due for important medical testing and appointments and just can't bring myself to call to make the appointments.

You just have to drag yourself and force yourself to the phone and get it over with.

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Default Oct 14, 2016 at 08:48 AM
  #5
I would do it from your ts office. Thats what ive done. Also like listen to voice mails and open snail mails there.
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Default Oct 14, 2016 at 10:23 AM
  #6
I'm exactly the same! I put off making a very important doctors appointment because I forgot to tell my doctor to automatically set my next one up. I was supposed to go 3 months ago... I just put it off and do other things and pretend I forgot.

What helps me is thinking about what might happen if I don't call, then I act! Pretending your good at making phone calls sometimes tricks your brain into thinking you really are.

Take deep breaths and remember it's only for a few minutes.
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Default Oct 14, 2016 at 11:57 AM
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I have issues with the phone too. I find calls from numbers I don't recognize triggering due to some events from the past. I'm in financial trouble so I get calls from morning to evening every day. I keep my ringer and vibrate turned off unless I'm expecting a call I can't ignore. I absolutely can not have voice mail, and have to make sure it is disabled and never a possibility of getting one. I have to have plenty of room to talk on the phone so I can pace quickly. I often go outside to make a phone call so I can walk all over the place. Every time I get a call from a new number, I have to save it in my contacts and look it up on google and make a note of who it likely is. Numbers I cant identify cause even more anxiety.

If I miss a call from a local number, or numbers within my state I will usually return those calls if I can not figure out who it was by googling them because I have to know who is after me. I usually get tight chested and have trouble breathing listening to it ring waiting for them to answer. Those first few moments until I they tell me who they are and what they want, I'm usually holding my breathe and getting hypervigilent,and being put on hold or having to wait to be transferred to the person seeking me is horrible.
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Default Oct 15, 2016 at 12:40 PM
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I'm so glad I'm not alone. Not that I wish this on anyone. I just got the new iPhone 7 because my 6 broke. And I loved when it was broke! I would just text people "can't talk, phone is broke". I've done that even when my phone wasn't broke too.
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Default Oct 15, 2016 at 01:08 PM
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I just found a new app this morning called blacklist+, and I can block any kind of calls or texts in any way i want to configure it. It instantly hangs up on unwanted calls and my phone doesn't even ring.
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Default Oct 15, 2016 at 01:09 PM
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I'll join the crowd. I've experienced phone phobia myself. It is so nice to know we're not alone. I don't feel so ridiculous now. Well, yeah I do, but I don't feel all alone.
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Default Oct 15, 2016 at 01:37 PM
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Both my daughter and I have phone phobia. I think I'm better with it, though. She has an ingrown toenail and still hasn't called for a doctor's appt. And since she's over 18 I can't do it for her. At least I just take a deep breath and plow through it, eventually.
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Default Oct 15, 2016 at 09:04 PM
  #12
I absolutely hate talking on the phone. The only person I'm comfortable doing so with is my wife. Otherwise, I put off calls forever before finally making them.

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Default Oct 16, 2016 at 06:06 AM
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Phone issues here too. I made a call once and person on the other end of the phone was lacking so much knowledge to their job, it took my mind off how uncomfortable it was to use the phone, before I realize it was happening. I started wondering how the person was ever hired in the first place. I try to remember that whenever I'm forced into having to use the phone on a "bad day". Try to think its going to be harder for the other person than you. Then jump in.
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Default Oct 18, 2016 at 07:59 AM
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Until about 6 months ago I had extreme phone phobia. Even if it was family or I recognizd the number I could not answer for I assumed it must be something bad. Usually it was the thought something catastrophic had happened to my children, otherwise it was fear it would be about an issue with my finances.

What changed is that I worked on catasrophic thinking with my therapist (CBT) and was prescribed an anti-obsessive. Oh, I'm still in a panic when it rings but I realize now I can't put things off. I still have problems with unknown numbers though. At times my fear will get a hold of me and I have to let it go to voicemail. I'm apprehensive about listening to the message(s) but at least no longer delete them without listening. I guess what I am trying to say is that fear still exists but I am able to get control over myself.
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Default Oct 19, 2016 at 10:12 PM
  #15
Ok guys I'm freaking out. My attorney said I have to call him tomorrow. And my dad said I have to call my grandma about my financial situation and my trust money. I'm having such bad anxiety and I probably won't even sleep tonight because of it.
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Default Oct 19, 2016 at 10:58 PM
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Talking on the phone used to bother me too. I still don't like it and it helps me to call the number and stand up and pace around the room. Walking while talking seems easier to me.
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Default Oct 20, 2016 at 09:45 AM
  #17
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Originally Posted by RxQueen875 View Post
Ok guys I'm freaking out. My attorney said I have to call him tomorrow. And my dad said I have to call my grandma about my financial situation and my trust money. I'm having such bad anxiety and I probably won't even sleep tonight because of it.

Have you ever tried writing down all the things you have to say? It helps me sometimes when I have to call someone, almost like a script. That way you don't get anxiety about forgetting to say something.

It's a good guideline, you should try it sometime if you haven't already!
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Default Oct 20, 2016 at 10:44 AM
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Originally Posted by Delicious View Post
Have you ever tried writing down all the things you have to say? It helps me sometimes when I have to call someone, almost like a script. That way you don't get anxiety about forgetting to say something.


It's a good guideline, you should try it sometime if you haven't already!


Thanks I'll try and do that. I'm not even joking I'm going to have to take my PRN for anxiety before I pick up the phone. My stomach is turning.
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Default Oct 20, 2016 at 03:06 PM
  #19
Ok I made my phone calls. My grandma of course made me feel like a loser about almost losing my house. That was expected and that's why I needed to take my PRN first. I have an intense fear of conflict. But the call to my lawyer went good. We're on the process of SSD so that's good. So there, I did it!
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Default Oct 20, 2016 at 03:45 PM
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(((Rxq))) im relieved for you! This reminds me, i need to block my aunts number before she calls me for no reason and depresses the living daylights out of me.
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