[GM Wystan]

Phone calls are one of the many activities that I find near-impossible to do. Whenever I receive a phone call, I let it ring out until I'm prepared to call back, which can range from an hour to never. If I need to make a phone call -- well, you get the point.

So, I'm looking for advice, and general advice as well, so that anyone else with the same problem might be able to draw from this resource. What are some tips you have for managing phone call anxiety? Do you have this problem, if so, what have you done to solve it?

I sincerely appreciate any replies, thank you .

I was diagnosed with social anxiety in the mid nineties. I was given a book and a work book with written and out in the field experiments. I found it helpful in dealing with the anxiety. I learned from the book that it had to do with irrational fears and blowing things out of proportion. When I did the field experiments, I would often blush, shake, fidget, sweat, and feel like running away. If I talked on the phone with someone I didn't know or without knowing exactly what I had to say or enough information to know what they might ask I'd avoid calls too. I would gather my thoughts, think through what dialog could transpire and go through scenarios until I felt I was capable of handling the stress. It was helpful for me to do this. If my voice would crack and I'd get nervous I'd just say something funny about it. "Sorry my voice keeps cracking, maybe I'm hitting late puberty and my voice is changing right in front of our ears". It depends on the type of call and the personality of who you are speaking with, but calling out my own issues instead of them being the first to helped me. I accepted I am human with flaws like everyone else and being nervous isn't a moral sin or anything.

When I'm depressed I ignored phone calls and can't talk. But I've learned to work with my anxiety instead of against it. Now, I tell people from the beginning I'm nervous and apologize or make a joke. If I shake hands and they are sweating I tell the person in advance, my palms are a bit sweaty, maybe I'm going through the change. This was funnier when I was in my early 20's but now just looks a reality so they accept it and move on. I try to take control, and calling myself out for my oddities and making them appear very human puts the other person at ease. When I was nervous in the past and would try to hide it, I just shook more, had nervous ticks and made people uncomfortable.

What types of calls do you avoid? Is it all calls? Is it all the time or more pronounced during certain situations? Can you explain how it feels when you let it ring and cannot answer? Can you explain the fears you have about it?

(((Hugs)))

My issue is catastrophic thinking. When the phone rings I panic that something bad has or will happen.

I let the voice mail get the call. If they leave a message and it is something important I will call back. Otherwise, I ignore it.

Same, almost all my calls go to voicemail. I call people on my time, on my terms, when I'm ready. When I can back I have a list of things to say. Hugs.