[PsychNitrous]

I've only talked about this to people a few times, but I feel like I need to talk about it now, and I don't see my therapist for another week. I had one of my phobias triggered majorly the other day, and I still feel really freaked out by it. I'm sure some of this will boarder on triggering, so be warned before you go on.

I have a pretty serous phobia of semi trucks. Several years ago I was driving on the interstate, going to an internship for school. The interstate here was three lanes each way, and I was maybe 1/2 to 1 mile from my exit. I'd moved to the far right lane so I wouldn't have to fight traffic when I got to the exit. I drove pretty close to too high over the speed limit at this time, and ended up passing a semi that was in the middle lane. As I passed him, he moved into the right lane behind me, but too soon. The semi tapped the outside corner of my back bumper as he switched lanes. I didn't feel it happen, but within seconds I started losing control of my car. I fought it, hard, but lost control and ended up driving across the three lanes of traffic and crashed into the median. I was so panicked, I remember the day in feelings and snapshots of images still. Especially scary was one snapshot, when I was perpendicular to the lanes of traffic. I remember looking out my window and seeing the front of another semi coming towards me. Luckily, I didn't get hit by anyone else, and there was a cop not far behind where I crashed who was on the scene almost as soon as my car stopped moving. My car was pretty damaged, but luckily I wasn't hurt, just scared and in shock.

So, fast forward to now, yesterday actually. I was out running some errands, and got to the stoplights at an intersection I needed to turn through. I was already pulling into the intersection and the light was turning yellow, so I knew I needed to go before it was red. I started pulling through the intersection, and from the other direction a semi decided not to stop at the red light. I froze up, it was like a mirror of my memories of the first accident. I really can't believe that I didn't just slam on the brakes and panic. I was lucky that the semi was going pretty slow, and was able to stop before he hit me, and I got through the intersection and to the store without any damage to the car or myself.

I didn't realize that it affected me so much, but I started panicking earlier today when I had to drive by a couple of semis. This is the worst fear for me to have, especially since my boyfriend doesn't have his license so I do all our driving. I see a semi truck and I'm so afraid of them hitting me or doing something stupid that will hurt me. I feel anxious just typing this up, even though there's nothing to hurt me now. I don't know if I'm looking for any answers or advice or anything, I just needed to get this out to someone who might understand. Thanks for reading.

[leejosepho]

Originally Posted by PsychNitrous

I was maybe 1/2 to 1 mile from my exit...far right lane...ended up passing a semi that was in the middle lane...he moved into the right lane behind me...within seconds I started losing control of my car.

Passing on the right in never a good idea, and I believe it is actually against the law in most states. In the future, slow down to a little below the speed limit in the right lane to help clear the area ahead of you before you exit.

Originally Posted by PsychNitrous

...yesterday...already pulling into the intersection and the light was turning yellow, so I knew I needed to go before it was red.

The law there is to remain behind the line and not enter the intersection at all unless the light is still green -- never enter under yellow -- and your path is completely clear so you cannot possibly be there after the light turns red. Large trucks can definitely seem intimidating at times, but good defensive driving practices will almost always keep you in the clear.

[PsychNitrous]

Originally Posted by leejosepho

Passing on the right in never a good idea, and I believe it is actually against the law in most states. In the future, slow down to a little below the speed limit in the right lane to help clear the area ahead of you before you exit.

I was stupid early-20's at the time, and probably was speeding. I don't really see how my idiocy caused the accident anyway, the truck should have waited until the lane was clear to move.

The law there is to remain behind the line and not enter the intersection at all unless the light is still green -- never enter under yellow -- and your path is completely clear so you cannot possibly be there after the light turns red. Large trucks can definitely seem intimidating at times, but good defensive driving practices will almost always keep you in the clear.

Maybe I should've clarified, I moved into the intersection while the light was green, and there were only a couple of cars coming before I had a clearing to turn.

I don't think either of these instances would have occurred differently if I'd been driving more defensively. Especially not the first one.