[janedough2344]

So, about 6 months ago... I had it rough, I mean was really low on my luck.

I was living in a house with 6 other individuals, no washing machine, no shower, just took bird baths in the kitchen sink everyday.

However, I found a guy on craigslist who was willing to give me a ride to work, I paid him $100 a week. It was all dangerous but I had no choice. And remind you I am a female.

However, the dude turned out to be really nice but really weird at the sametime and I think he was an alcoholic because he would be very amped when he picked me up and I would smell the liquor reeking. However, I had no choice because I had to go to work to make money to save up so that i can get a car, and finish my online course to become a Medical Coder.

However, I am now feeling really low about a situation referring to my hygiene. I'm starting to think that the guy maybe thought I smelled and thinking back I probably did. I'm thinking he probably smelled after I ejected from the car, although I never smelt myself... and I wasn't just flat out dirty, I did birdbaths, but the house I lived in had an odor! Then there was a guy at work who liked me and harassed me all the time, but I feel as if he was throwing hints that maybe I had an odor. In which I probably did... but I know that that's not who I am originally, like now, that I'm in a better place I'm at my best now. I just feel bad, and maybe like everyone viewed me to be a bum. I just was down on my luck, my family is toxic, and i'm the scapegoat... im the youngest out of 6 siblings, they all have good jobs and businesses, were extremely spoiled growing up because of their dad. But my dad is an alcoholic, and my mom just never cared too much. I was always depressed and lost in life. SO I moved out to try to better my life and find myself and lord has it been a challenge. I lived in a semi abandoned home with 6 other people, I left there and slept in my car for a month until I got a good job last month and I moved into a nice apartment and feel really good.

But I feel like people will always be able to throw up the time when I didn't have anything, when I was a bum, and etc.

I feel trapped in my own mind.

[IrisBloom]

I'm sure that was a really unsettling, maybe traumatic experience for you. Remember it takes time to bounce back emotionally and mentally. Stop beating yourself up for things you had little choice about. Enjoy your new life and look to the future.

If I were you and anyone brought up the time when you were a "bum" I'd just give them a weird look. lol

[AnnaBettina]

I read this and think, my gosh, what a survivor this woman is. You are quite impressive...and, too, if the worst thing you ever do is to smell bad,
well, you're close to sainthood.

Those folks whose lives have mostly rolled easy aren't my role models.
No, people like you who have overcome so much,
they are my role models and the kind of people I want in my life.

Think of yourself that way, quite impressive. As for the Craigslist guy, the mother in me shudders...was there no one at work you could offer that $100 to or to some retired fixed income older woman who would be safe and also greatly need the money? What about Uber/Lyft?

GL on the medical coding. And no more Craigslist stuff...one too many dangerous people running around.

Originally Posted by janedough2344

So, about 6 months ago... I had it rough, I mean was really low on my luck.

I was living in a house with 6 other individuals, no washing machine, no shower, just took bird baths in the kitchen sink everyday.

However, I found a guy on craigslist who was willing to give me a ride to work, I paid him $100 a week. It was all dangerous but I had no choice. And remind you I am a female.

However, the dude turned out to be really nice but really weird at the sametime and I think he was an alcoholic because he would be very amped when he picked me up and I would smell the liquor reeking. However, I had no choice because I had to go to work to make money to save up so that i can get a car, and finish my online course to become a Medical Coder.

However, I am now feeling really low about a situation referring to my hygiene. I'm starting to think that the guy maybe thought I smelled and thinking back I probably did. I'm thinking he probably smelled after I ejected from the car, although I never smelt myself... and I wasn't just flat out dirty, I did birdbaths, but the house I lived in had an odor! Then there was a guy at work who liked me and harassed me all the time, but I feel as if he was throwing hints that maybe I had an odor. In which I probably did... but I know that that's not who I am originally, like now, that I'm in a better place I'm at my best now. I just feel bad, and maybe like everyone viewed me to be a bum. I just was down on my luck, my family is toxic, and i'm the scapegoat... im the youngest out of 6 siblings, they all have good jobs and businesses, were extremely spoiled growing up because of their dad. But my dad is an alcoholic, and my mom just never cared too much. I was always depressed and lost in life. SO I moved out to try to better my life and find myself and lord has it been a challenge. I lived in a semi abandoned home with 6 other people, I left there and slept in my car for a month until I got a good job last month and I moved into a nice apartment and feel really good.

But I feel like people will always be able to throw up the time when I didn't have anything, when I was a bum, and etc.

I feel trapped in my own mind.