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I already don't like talking on the phone (or in general really), but him calling puts me into a slight panic.

He didn't do anything bad to me if that's what people would think. However, I do have a slight dislike for him, considering his personality and past. He is in jail, for reasons that are half his fault and half not. He has anger issues, and I find him pretty rude and disrespectful sometimes. Especially to his wife and my great-grandmother, who I live with (she has a short temper as well).

He went to jail when I was pretty young (around 11). I was never a talkative child, especially with grown-ups in my family. My sisters were closer to him than I ever was. So it's pretty awkward and uncomfortable. Then the fact that he wants me to see him on my 18th birthday, which is in two weeks, is just. Ugh. I don't want to go. It's like visiting a stranger.

[mote.of.soul]

Hi. Yes, you have every right to feel the way you feel toward your father and not wish to see him. But I'd just like to say, if you can't go see him for yourself, can you do it for him? He obviously made mistakes in his life and has some personal issues but, although I'm not a parent myself, I think I can understand that inner love they must feel for their children no matter what. But if you don't want to see him for yourself, that's okay, and if you don't want to see him for his benefit, that's okay too. No one should force you to go and see someone you don't really like.