<font color="purple"> And went from a 20 to a 21...
On a side note, I'm picking at myself less often.

aaaand on a bad side note I am getting more and more obsessive thoughts (wait...what kind of a trade off is THAT?)most of 'em involve the usual 'death' theme, but now it has a new buddy, which would be the thoughts about sexuality (and worrying about wether or not I'm a pedophile)

of course, this is pretty comon stuff I know.
But still, it's kinda annoying.

I mean, will someone PLEASE shut my brain up for about...5 minutes? For once? Of course, NOBODY can do that (not even me! Every time I try to calm my mind and silence my thoughts it only lasts for a few breif seconds before it starts chatting away again) and no, it's not like I'm always thinking about my obsessions, but I get sick of me talking to myself all the time.

If I tried to write up a transcript of my thoughts, my hands would be way too slow. If I tried to say everything I was thinking, I'd be too limited by the things I can say at once, and how fast I can say them.
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[Cyran0]

Kaika, I'm really sorry you're struggling so much. Are you currently in therapy or on medication for this?

Cyran0

[Perna]

You have to learn to skim your thoughts for only the "salient points" LOL. Pretend your thoughts are a book and you're speed reading. If a subject you want/need comes up, look at it more closely but otherwise practice just letting the stream be "white noise". I have tintinitis in one bad ear but I can tune in to it or not pretty much as I choose. Practice focusing "out" rather than "in".

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Cyran0 said:
Kaika, I'm really sorry you're struggling so much. Are you currently in therapy or on medication for this?

Cyran0

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

<font color="purple">Well, I'm going to get a therapist EVENTUALY, but I don't know when, because even though dad's insurance will probably cover most of it, it being the holday season, we are just too busy to really look into it in depth!

As for medication...? I'm kinda 'iffy' about it. I mean, I'm pretty avoidant of taking pills because it usualy involves me throwing them back up a few seconds later anyways (or at least feeling sick to my stomach for about 15 seconds) but also, I kinda wonder how necessary something like that would really be right now, you know?

I apreaciate the sympathy. </font>