[thimotea]

I think I'm developing a real problem with my mental health. It seems to me that hackers are watching me through my phone's camera. Recently I bought a new video card and there are absolutely crazy thoughts, they say, the seller has built some thing into video card, which will record everything I do there in the complucter (I do understand how ridiculous that thought is). I also think I like I *know* what a person is thinking. For example, I talk to someone and I feel like I have a clear idea, that I know what the person is thinking, their emotions, and so on. I also think that everyone secretly likes me and everyone is in love with me, but they just hide it. For a while, I was convinced that the teacher wanted to **** me, lol, and because of this, I skipped his classes. And my inner dialog as if from the outside, gives me advice, I do not conduct a dialogue in my head from the first person at all, as if voice in my head I and a body are have different personalities. A lot of obsessive, intrusive delusional thoughts. I think I'm halfway to schizophrenia. What to do?I don't drink, I don't smoke, don't do drugs, I've been shut in for many years.

[Yaowen]

Dear thimotea,

I am so terribly sorry you are afflicted with these mental health issues. I wish I knew what to say that would help. It is just heartbreaking that you are having to suffering these things!

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen

[Skeezyks]

Hello thimotea: I see this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to Psych Central.

You asked what you should do regarding your mental health concerns. The simple answer, I believe, is to see a mental health professional... perhaps a psychologist or a mental health therapist to begin with. And then, if medication seems to be warranted, you might also see a psychiatrist.

You mentioned you've been shut in for many years. While I'm not completely shut in, I am mostly solitary. And I do know, from personal experience, that being cut off from society has a way of working on your mental health (& not necessarily in a good way.)

You also mentioned feeling as though you're halfway to schizophrenia. So here's a link to an article, from Psych Central's archives, on that subject. And then here are links to 3 additional articles that, while they may not relate to your situation specifically, may (hopefully) be of help with gaining some perspective regarding what you are experiencing:

Schizophrenia Guide: Symptoms, Treatment & More | Psych Central

Psychotic Depression

Coming to Terms with Your Delusions

Possible To Come Out of Psychotic State Without Medication? - Ask the Therapist

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.