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Legendary Wise Elder
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#241
I've been sort of chill today even though I had some difficult business to deal with. I'm starting to get anxious now. I took a lot of Klonopin this morning. It's probably time for more.
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Legendary Wise Elder
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#242
I’m a combination of super anxious and super tired. I don’t know what’s worse.
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Breaking Dawn, Deilla, SprinkL3
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Legendary Wise Elder
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#243
I'm anxious. I have a therapy meeting. I angry cause she hasn't been responded to my messages in my therapy room. She completely ignored me today.
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Breaking Dawn, SprinkL3
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#244
I'm a little anxious, though I'm not as anxious as I was before. I got to see my new primary care doc on video for the first time. She ordered a bunch of tests, and she plans on sending me prescriptions of holistic stuff, like a generic probiotic, Vitamin D, and then some topical thing to try for an area that seems infected.
I'm afraid of a ton of things. But I think that I'm calming down from my fears by looking for things that are safe whenever I consider my fears. My T suggested a safety list whenever I'm honed in on a fear. That seems to be helping me cope. |
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Breaking Dawn
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#245
I was doing quite well for weeks now. Not much anxiety. Then this sense of well-being has just collapsed. I've been finding bug bites on my legs and arms. I don't know what's biting me. I'm worried some kind of bugs have gotten into my apartment. I'm worried sick about this.
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Breaking Dawn, SprinkL3
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#246
Quote:
I also had to deal with bedbugs in a different state that was infested with them. It was horrible. Their bites are like two or three together, and sometimes all over one arm or back or leg or multiple places. Usually they bite in twos or threes, and you'll see like small red welts. If they are super itchy, it's most likely bed bugs. Those are harder to get rid of. They can enter your home if you purchase used furniture, travel anywhere, help someone move, deal with a neighbor who has an infestation, purchase items without knowing they had bed bug eggs (like at Target, when they resell returns that look new, but aren't), etc. A specialized exterminator would need to come out and figure out where the infestation was. For me, it was a few bugs in the couch, where my friend slept on and brought to my home. I wrapped the couch in plastic and paid for a special removal - with notifying them that it needed to be fumigated. My friend also broke my couch's arm, since she was obese and didn't know her weight. I paid for that myself though. I knew she was embarrassed. But I never had any friends spend the night after that. This was about 8 years ago, give or take. The bed bug problem went away, but I didn't have an infestation. It was just a couple of bugs she brought over from an infestation at our college. Horrible times! I hope you find the source. You can also see if you have poison ivy or something like that, too, which is more manageable than a bug infestation. |
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Breaking Dawn
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#247
My anxiety comes & goes throughout the day, usually relieved by distraction.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
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Deilla, SprinkL3
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#248
I have to admit since giving up soda not by choice my anxiety has been a lot better. Especially since I haven’t been replacing it with a lot of black tea and coffee. I had a grande coffee today and it didn’t do much to my anxiety. I’ve only had one Valium and these last 2 days I’ve been doing well with leaving my house without anxiety. It could also be my new med but I think it’s the drastic decrease in caffeine. I’m not happy about having to stop the soda though. I really enjoyed it and I found it to be helpful with my hunger and weight loss.
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Breaking Dawn, Deilla, SprinkL3
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#249
My anxiety was really high today, since I went outside and was at multiple places getting vaccines (got the flu shot and Moderna #3 full-dose jab). I met a new person today for the first time. I spent a considerable amount of time indoors, including getting blood drawn for multiple tests my primary care wanted me to do - all at like 6:40 a.m., long before the vaccines I received later on that morning. I fear getting 'Rona, so I fear going outside at all. I was on high alert all today and worried about germs, diseases, contamination, etc.
But my parts inside helped me (I have DID). So my anxiety was bearable. I tried to focus on safe things, and I also enjoyed being outside, seeing the sun, meeting a new person, seeing other people getting their vaccines and blood drawn, and feeling not so alone in the struggle. No one said anything mean to me today, so that was a plus. My new friend was also very kind and had interesting things to say. I showered when I returned home, which helped me to feel safe - at least with the thoughts that I washed all the germs, pathogens, and impurities away - except for the good bacteria that we all need. I slept (finally), and I woke up feeling "accomplished." My anxiety isn't as bad as I thought it would be today. |
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Breaking Dawn, Deilla
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#250
Suffering with anxiety right now. Started last eve. I had a few Ativan tablets left over from July, when I had anxiety bad for a while. So I used up that Ativan. I slept so good after taking it. Wish I had some for tonight. I do have phenergan. I'll try that.
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Breaking Dawn, Deilla, SprinkL3
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Legendary Wise Elder
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#251
I feel a little anxious. I have to clean a litter box and I'm not sure how I will do today. Yesterday, I was light-headed and dizzy. I hope today is better. But I'm not looking forward to it at all.
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Breaking Dawn, SprinkL3
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#252
I'm feeling apprehensive but I'm managing ok right now.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
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Deilla, SprinkL3
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#253
I had a soda today. Every time something new comes out I have to try it. It doesn’t even taste good because my new med makes soda taste flat and I can’t taste the carbonation. But it’s making my anxiety more there then it was yesterday. I’m thinking of taking a cocktail of my usual 160mil geodon, 40mil of melatonin, and a 4th Valium and getting under my weighted blanket. I know it’s a lot but I am super anxious and I just want to be able to relax.
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Breaking Dawn, Deilla, SprinkL3
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#254
I'm more fatigued today, so my anxiety is lowered. It's still in there in terms of intrusive thoughts and trauma memories, but I'm too tired to feel the panic.
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Breaking Dawn, Deilla
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Legendary Wise Elder
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#255
I tried to talk to my mom about my nephew going trick or treating. So that was nice. But then she started complaining about my brother-in-law. I became very anxious after that. I tried to end the conversation and get off the phone. I had to tap and meditate to cope with the bad feelings I had.
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Breaking Dawn, SprinkL3
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#256
I am feeling the anxiety so I'm trying to be calm.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
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SprinkL3
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#257
I can’t remember if I’ve had 2 or 3 Valium today. My body is saying I’ve only had 2. My mind is saying I want another no matter if I had 2 or 3. So I don’t know. Maybe I’ll try my usual melatonin to see how that goes. I’ve been behind on my meds today. I took half my meds more then an hour later then I normally would and the next batch was about half an hour later. The melatonin is still on time and can be taken now or in a bit.
I was nervous today but also ok. __________________ Ridin' with Biden Last edited by Mountaindewed; Nov 01, 2021 at 04:54 PM.. |
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Breaking Dawn, SprinkL3
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#258
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Breaking Dawn, Mountaindewed, SprinkL3
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Breaking Dawn, Mountaindewed, SprinkL3
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#259
Anxiety is gone for now. I have Phenergan available to me. (25 mg tabs) If I take 3 tabs (75 mg,) it does help me get to sleep. Took some last night. Slept pretty good.
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Breaking Dawn, SprinkL3
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Legendary Wise Elder
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#260
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Its also been suggested to me by a therapist to use one of those time locked ones to help my med issues. I looked one time and they are like $70. __________________ Ridin' with Biden |
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Breaking Dawn, SprinkL3
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Rose76
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