my health woes

If it wasn't for my heart, I don't know if I would have ever developed anxiety. It all started in beginning of October 2007. Two days after I got back from my honeymoon, I was driving home from work and BAM! I was hit with tachacardia and felt like I was going to black out. I had shortness of breath moments before the fast heart rate, so I took my inhaler thinking it was my asthma. Boy was I wrong, but how was I to know? I was speeding down my side street to get to my house when I really should have pulled over. My heart-rate had to be around 180 at the time, and I went to the hospital and they were unable to figure anything out. I followed up with my new family doc the next day, and was put on a 24 hour holter monitor. They found my issue. I had developed atrial fibrillation and a tachacardia. It most likely developed because of my hypothyroidism I didn't know I had either. I then seen a cardiologyst who then sent me to an electrophysiologyst. I was put on Toprol XL and Flecainide. This brought me a lot of relief and the scary symptoms I was having didn't happen as much. But I hate taking medicine and I wanted to get rid of this a-fib once and for all (being i am only 22). I was taken off my toprol and flecainide for a week before my catheter ablation (12/17/07) procedure to correct my arrythmia. That was one horrible week. A day before the procedure I was on my way home from work again and BAM tachacardia hit again. My heart was flying so fast I had to pull over and call EMS. If I had kept driving I don't know what would have happened. (this is where I developed my panic attacks as far as driving). I had the procedure, and it was a success. For the next two weeks as my heart healed, I still had a faster heart-rate and atrial flutter (this was to be expected though during the healing time). I had been through so much worries and over stressing from Oct to December 17th that this is where the anxiety originated. I had never had anxiety before the a-fib hit me. Some people couldnt understand why I was feeling this way considering I the procedure was successfull. They obviously didn't understand that I (in a way) lost trust in my heart and was so scared I was the 1% chance of everything that could turn into a complication. I was fine, but the anxiety made me think otherwise. I came back to work 4 days later, but had to call someone in 3 hours into my 8 hour shift because I had this feeling my heart was going to go into tachacardia again. At that point I beleive it was the anxiety. I had called my doc and she gave me a 10 day supply of xanax and said she wanted to see me in her office within the next week. I took off two weeks of work total because I kept having panic attacks everytime I thought my heart felt strange or just some random feeling inside that freaked me out. I was in and out of the hospital because I was so scared of every little thing I felt. Besides for the a-fib which I am now cured of, I have had asthma all my life. I seem to have developed a fear of my inhaler if I feel I have to use it while driving. And of course I beleive that was triggered by the fact the first time the tachacardia happened while driving, I had taken my inhaler. So if I happen to need my inhaler while driving, I think back to when my heart acted up and I automatically get the fear that it will speed up uncontrollably for no reason. I saw the doc and she put me on Citalopram. My body doesn't ever have side effects to medicines so I panicked when I had a ton of side effects from this medicine. It was new years eve and I was riding with my dad to his brothers house for the party, and he was talking and all of a sudden I got really hott and felt like pins and needles and electricity was traveling all through my body. I freaked out because I didn't know what was wrong with me. (Later on I had read that Citalopram can create feelings of electric shock over the body upon the start of the medication as chemicals changed in the brain). Thats when I went to the hospital because I let all these side effects scare me into thinking I was having a heart issue. They told me to follow up with my doc and try either Zoloft or Effexor. My doc had put me on Zoloft. I was terrified I would have the same horrible symptoms that I had with the citalopram. (By the way I had pretty much 75% of the side effects listed for the drug!!) I have now been on Zoloft for 3 weeks and the only side effect Ive had is insomnia. So I went from heart arrythmia to anxiety, and anxiety to bad asthma for 3 weeks because I was too stubborn to get seen for it and wanted to wait for my follow up appointment in the second week of Feb. Finally I couldn't breathe enough that I decided to go in. I had let the asthma get so bad that I had about 10 different weezes going on at the same time. Now I am sick with the flu and it seems to be effecting my anxiety. I need a break in between all of these health woes! First the arrythmia, then anxiety, then asthma, and finally the flu (everything right after another). I can actually breathe now, I am on prednisone to help with my asthma. The Zoloft is a great help and keeps my progress with the anxiety. I started off having two anxiety attacks a day, and now they are down to two a week I would think. The severity of the attacks have gone down, I still have somewhat of a problem with the driving, if the weather remindes me of the day the tachacardia hit me, I will start to panic. I will pull over and check my pulse. It doesn't help that it takes 25-30 mins to get to work! After the ablation procedure the anxiety/panic disorder was so bad that I would be afraid to take a shower thinking I would randomly pass out in the shower and nowone would hear, or if they did my family would have to bust down the door and see my naked body. I would get in the shower and try and get out as quick as possible. I would pull the curtain closed, but keep the door open in case I needed to call out to someone. In the middle of the night I was afraid to get out of bed or off the couch because I thought if I walked to the bathroom I would pass out. Thankfully after taking a few more showers after the procedure I was staying in the shower longer then realizing it was actually relaxing me. I am now over the showering fear at least! Showering was one of my favorite relaxation things to do so I was darned if the anxiety was going to take that away from me. I still take the rest of my xanax the hospital gave me when the anxiety really gets to me, but I only have about 5 left and barely use them. The Zoloft has helped me a long way so far and I am greatful. I still have anxiety moments but Its still going to take some time before I can trust my health again. I work at a hotel and most of the time we are the only one working the entire hotel. Once and a great while I will work the morning shift and the manager will be there, as well as housekeeping, etc. I work mostly 3-11's and a couple 11-7 night shifts. The night shifts are the hardest with this anxiety, I get on the phone and call a friend or my husband (but that only works so long till everyone is sleeping). I am supposed to deliver receipts under the room doors in the middle of the night but the anxiety gets to me and I just don't do it anymore. I have considered leaving my job and finding one where I could work with a crew and always have someone working the shift with me, but I like where I work and I don't want this anxiety to stop my life. My panic attacks (the full blown ones) consist of: cold sweat, sudden feeling of being hot, tingling head to toe and slightly elevated heart rate. I get scared and automatically think "hospital hospital hospital". But as soon as it subsides I am fine. Before the Zoloft I would take roads to work that had a hospital on the way in case I had an anxiety attack and decided I couldn't make it to work. That part was the most irritating to me, I don't like to think that way. I need some breaks in between all these health issues please!

Happy Birthday YellowApple22 and WELCOME!!!! Just wanted you to know you are not alone with the anxiety. The fears and worries seem quite common for panic/anxiety disorder. I too have had those issues with driving, taking a certain path, worrying about being helped, worried about work, what will people think....My breathing is the big issue with me. I think it all goes back to when I seen my grandmother on the night she died. She was dying from lung cancer and fought for every breath and that plays in my mind over and over...worried that it will happen to me. So I understand about these triggers.

I have been in therapy and learned some relaxing techniques. Do you have a therapist? It might be beneficial to you if you sought one out. It always helped me to talk to someone who understood and listened.

PC is a good place to find helpful people that you can share your concerns with and they understand. I know I have found comfort here.

Don't get discouraged if people do not respond to you right away. There is a vast of people from different time zones and countries so sometimes it seems like nobody is there but really there are many. Sometimes time can be a hinder....

Take care and keep posting...I think you will find it very helpful to share with people who share similiar experience. This way you don't feel so alone as you find your way....

Take care and once again Happy B-day and WELCOME....
Snowy

Thank-you for the friendly invite! No I don't see a phych, I guess I am seeing if I can do without, but I may look into one depending on how the next month or so goes. I am open to anything, and I would have no problem spilling my guts out to a stranger, thats for sure. My mom went through the panic disorder when I was a younger child when her mitral valve prolapse acted up. Once she realised what it was all about she learned to control the attacks and hasn't had an attack for probibly over 10 years. Luckily I know a couple of friends who have gone through anxiety, so help isn't too far away.