[LoneRose]

Just when i thought i was ok a panick attack pops back into my life I used to have MANY all the time. I would get one in the middle of a conversation with friends, husband or anyone really. I would suddenly take a step out of my body and look at myself, thinking oh my god, everybody is staring at you... My voice would seem so huge and i would then start shaking and go very red in the face.. I would stop talking and quickly go somewhere to hide. In the end i would get a panick attack just from meeting a friend.
It really messed up my life and i tried avoiding meeting people i knew and avoided any conversation.
Anyway, it suddenly just dissapeared to my great joy and i thought it was gone for good.
But tonight it came back.. I was sitting on the couch talking to a very good friend, i was feeling really happy and suddenly i "took a step outside my body" and heard my voice again.. I felt myself getting really dizzy and i started having trouble speaking properly. It was awful
Thank god i could control it in time and didn´t have to stop and make a silly excuse and leave.. But it chocked me.. a lot!
WHYYYY does it have to come back??? I just hate it.....

[pegasus]

Sounds like the 'fear' got triggered while you were talking with your friend, do you remember what you were talking about at the time?

I'm glad you were able to recover fairly quickly and were able to recognize something was amiss.

Hopefully next time it happens you will be able to step out of your fear and have a calming voice to reassure you that everything is ok and that you can cope with this.

((((((( LoneRose )))))))

[LoneRose]

I was talking to her about my bipolar worries. I can now see why that would affect me. I felt all exposed and embarrsed. Feeling she was judging me and thinking bad stuff out me.

Thanks for listening (((((((pegasus))))))

[Sannah]

Originally Posted by LoneRose

I felt all exposed and embarrsed. Feeling she was judging me and thinking bad stuff out me.

Hi Rose, this is common. I think that self worth has something to do with it too.

Just the other day I was asked a question in a group with 3 other woman. I answered it without thinking and then felt this "exposure". My face turned bright red but I sat there with my head held up and did not let myself feel bad. I acted like it was okay and it passed. Years ago I discovered that almost everyone is embarrassed from time to time and IT ISN'T A CRIME!

Sounds like you might get a bit of dissociation from this because your feelings are so powerful?

Maybe this went away for a bit because you were avoiding situations and playing very safe. You felt better for awhile and now you are venturing out again?