[ChandKiRani]

I was told more peope would respond if I wrote my problem in a new thread so I copied my the post I wrote in " social phobia" here :

I in general can`t talk to other people except some friends and close family members without getting nervous and panic. But of course, in life i have to. Normally I just avoid social situations or try to keep them at a minimum. At school I say as little as possible, I avoid answering the phone at home and if i do i`ll just say " yes?" so the people have to talk first and i can find out who it is and what the person wants. Like this I`m getting along pretty well but sometimes there`s a point where I just have to go and talk and do more.. and I don`t know how to handle my anxiety. At the moment I actually should ( I have to do it from school so no chance to get away without doing it) organize myself an internship ( is that the word?! My mother tongue is German and I don`t know if it`s the right English word) in any place/ company etc. I like, for a week in september. It is meant to show us how having a job will be later etc. so far so good, but: I just can`t! I`m too afraid even to only call somewhere and ask if they have a place for me. Not talking about the interview and really working with all those people I don`t know.. I just don`t know what to do to overcome my fears. I really need to get this done soon as many companies don`t offer this at all and all students in my grade have to do this at the same time so there won`t be too many opportunities left if I wait too long. Any ideas/ tips on how I could do this? My mom said she couldn`t call there instead of me.. which is clear of course but I don`t think I myself am able to organize this.

[madisgram]

so sorry you are feeling this way. i can relate because in the past this fear has almost paralyzed me. first of all, why don't you write down what you need to say when you call for the internship? even if you have to read it on the phone it will help you not get "tongue tied"...meaning not knowing what to say. even if you fail at first at least you are trying.
as for everyday living with a social phobia...what has worked for me is to practice talking to others in small doses. like say "hello" when you answer the phone. it doesn't have to be big accomplishments at first, it's almost like practicing. as time goes on you will build on these successful interactions. it will help you overcome the fears. just take baby steps at first. good luck to you and i hope what has worked for me will help you too.

[Sannah]

I know you need some quick coping strategies here but what runs through your mind when you are afraid to talk to people? What do you think might happen which makes you afraid? Do you have low self esteem?