[Sunybear]

Hi all,
I have a 20 year old son who has ADHD that went undiagnosed until he was 17 because he really wasn't hyper active to the point where anyone saw the signs. By the time he was diagnosed he had fallen behind 2 years in high school and came to me crying because he felt like such a dummy and a failure.

Well, he decided he wanted his high school diploma no matter how long it took and he was doing pretty good for a while there. he has tried concerta, ritalin, and adderall. none of these helped him enough to live with the side effects of the meds so he went for a while without anything and of course he ended up struggling in school.

He fell behind again and chose to go back on ritalin so he could try and finish school but he couldn't catch up in time and with only 3 credits needed to graduate, he dropped out. He didn't have any hope. The teachers and officials at the school have been calling alot trying to talk him into coming back to finish it out but he is reluctant. He does not believe he is capable of getting his GED because he had to take algebra 6 times in high school just to barely pass it and its a requirement for a GED.

He is stuck in a rut. He doesn't have much to look forward to in his future without SOME proof of education and he is so burned out on high school that going back at his age even for half a semester is daunting to him. But he is considering it and I want to be able to do SOMETHING to help him reach his goal.

I tried herbal remedies but he couldn't remember to take it regularly. I know ADHD affects his mood, has changed his personality as he has gotten older and is causing him to have very low self esteem. My son is not only intelligent, he is a very talented artist. He prefers grafitti art and spent alot of money towards his artwork on our fine city buildings,( fines and such) but nonetheless, he is very talented and has much to offer the world.

How do I help him? What can I do? His father passed away 2 years ago so its just me and him.I would so appreciate any ideas and suggestions any of you may have.Thank you ahead of time.

Sunybear

[Yoda]

hello sunybear

I have a 21 y/o son with ADHD and bipolar. My son has never got his hs diploma or GED despite an IQ of 130 and being gifted in math. He has never had a job. I know how frustrated you feel. I am frustrated too. I worry if my son will ever be independent. I don't have any answers. I am trying to help my son too but he is not working much to help himself. I had written a longer response but then the computer ate it. I hope we can help our kids to use their talents.

I have heard that omega 3 supliments really do help. Also keeping an electronic palm for all things instead of trying to remember lots of things he just has to remember to look in the palm on a daily basis.

[Sunybear]

Yoda, I'm sorry you are experiencing the same problem. I think they give up trying because its too hard.I don't know. Like you I worry about his future. I am the only family he has. I'm 47 and fairly healthy in spite of chronic fatigue and fibromyalgia but I know I won't be here for him forever and THAT is what worries me most. He simply CANNOT become totally dependent on me if he intends to make it in the world when I'm gone.

Fortunately he has had the same job since he was 15 but he works as a grill cook in a small family diner near our home and although thats been a good job for him so far, he doesn't make much and I have to help him out alot. He lives at home of course and I was hoping he would be able to find a better paying job when he finished high school but it seems he afraid to step out and leave the job he is comfortable with.

I sure appreciate your answer.And I hate when the computer eats a good long post.Thank for taking time for me. I hope things will turn around for your son.

Tishie, I have heard omega3 is good too.And so is ginko but we fought alot when he would forget to take it and I would remind him because he felt like I was nagging him. He couldn't see I was trying to help him make his life easier.I spent a small fortune on herbal stuff for him. Stuff he never took.Its like Yoda said about her son not helpimg himself.... mine doesn't do much to help himself either. I was doing it all and that doesn't work ya know? Its SO FRUSTRATING!

Thank you for taking time to respond.

Peace, Sunybear