Finally hit my first snafoo

I suppose all good things come to an end. Little back ground about doc, I instantly clicked with her and she had a great personality, not that of a 2X4. Well basically since I met her, she has been flaky but I could over look that because I finally found someone I connected with and really listened. Well I think the straw that has finally broken the camel's back has arisen. I was going to my appointment on tuesday, well 20 mins before the appt. her receptionist calls me and says she is on loa indefinitely. I am like great, so what do I do to refill my prescription? receptionist gives me a number of who she is referring her patients to, I see the company and think great, I have dealt with the company in the past and did not have good luck but I went in there with an open mind hoping this one would be different. So i go in sit down and begin talking to the nurse, explaining what has happened. well she has me fill a paper then hands me another and keeps asking me if I am nervous because I am bouncing my leg tapping looking around the room etc. I am like nope. I am just doing it because I hate sitting still, I always do it when I am sitting. It is normal and I have always done it, I do it so that I do not feel like I am rubber band being stretched tighter and tighter. Well after she gets her answer of me being nervous we move on I try answering the paper, asks me if I have had any other conditions mentioned to me besides adhd, I am like o yeah I have been told depression anxiety dysthymia ocd. I do agree with them but they have all been rooted in my adhd and have gotten much better since I started treatment. So I try approaching this appointment like I did with my other doctor who flaked, well this lady does not want to hear my story, just keeps shoving the papers in my face, for anxiety depression ocd, never listened to my story, and this was suppose to be the initial. All she had cared about was the damn papers. so we go through all the motions of filling the papers out. get to the end and come to find out the lady is like I have to go get a psychiatrist to come in and talk and tell him what I am doing, I had no idea she was a nurse until the end. Then the doctor comes in and talks and the nurse gives him the blurb of whats going on and what she learned, tells him my doses of adderall tells him 30mg twice a day, I am like uh no, it is 20 mg 3 times a day. nurse replies oh yeah that is what I meant to say. I just shake my head, then I am talking to the doctor and he is like did you ever get formally tested, I am like no my doctor said on her initial appt that she had no doubt in my mind that I had adhd and that she could send me in for testing but it would be a waste of money and time as she feels I did not need it. She said my history from when I was kid up until now was the evidence she needed. Well then the doctor says, well it is easy for anyone to hand out the diagnosis, I am like she is a board certified psychiatrist and a specialist in adhd, that is her expertise. The doctor also asked me to if she was a doctor, I was like uh yeah, she did prescribe me a controlled medication, so I highly doubt she is handing the stuff out illegally without a license.(it was all current online)He then says well, we have protocols, so you need to go get formally tested for adhd, ocd, anxiety, depression and the nurse told me I have 3 months to do it. I told her, are you going to pay for it? I told you in the beginning I do not have insurance. I was like so what about the patient history and stuff? He replied with, oh that is just a general tool, you need to be formally tested to make sure you have the diagnosis. I was like really, because to many people count on tests in this industry and they are not always accurate and reflect the proper diagnosis. The history is where you get the greatest andmost accurate info along with having a parent come in like I did with other doctor. But they gave me a doctor to go to and set up a formal testing. I was like are you guys gonna set it up. they said no. So I was like alright, I got my one month supply adderall, I am going to save it for when I start my school internship while I try to figure out what to do. I looked up the guy who was suppose administer the testing they wanted done, low and behold he works for the same damn company, I was screw that, I am not doing that because they just want money, they the testing per is typically like 300 dollars. I was like are they insane? basically they wanted me to give them just over 1000 dollars to get officailly tested. I was like I don't thinks. The doctor who came in also said that they were not attacking me, but I was like well the whole time I have been here I have felt like I was on my heels. I am running into the same treatment I had at the other office I had been to before that is under you company umbrella. all you want is money, you people have no personalities, don't try to listen to your patients or make a connection. To boot they basically told me that my doctor was wrong in diagnosing me with adhd, even though she is a specialist in the area and is her expertise.

Sorry for the long rant I am just irritated that I feel I was finally making more progress then I ever have, and now it has all crumbled down right in front of me and makes me wonder why I even bothered trying again in the first place. So I am basically stuck. I guess I wil start searching again and see what I can come up with. No idea where to go now. I don't really want to regress. I have not drank any alcohol in 6 months, cut out all the caffeine I was drinking. My father has seen many positive changes along with my mom, but now I am not sure if I will be able to hold it together because all the progress I have made seems like a moot point now.

--Maus5321

I didn't know that you had to get officially tested. i've heard that it can be quite pricey, as you were mentioning. It sounds like this doctor wants formal documentation or something. It is kind of understandable, as controlled substances are controlled for a reason. but it sounds like you have already had a diagnosis from an experienced person, so i get your frustration. Sorry your going through this.

I had the receptionist of my doc see if she would release her records to the place I went to, I mean her word should be good enough. That should be documentation enough, but I think they want me to go do there testing because that is what the other doctor wanted me to do at a different location under the same company banner. I am not in this for the drugs. I do not care about that. If I could conquer it on my own I would, but the treatment has given me the edge I been searching for so I did not feel like I was always playing catch up. I will not continue with the place i went to, they just want money, its all a scheme to suck people dry.

Oh and thanks for the words of encouragement miswimmy

I think that you should find another place that is more supportive. I think that you can find the treatment that you need elsewhere... somewhere that is less expensive and not so rigid. good luck!

I will defnitely be searching, I can find something again, I did it once it can happen again. I guess I just needed to vent

Thanks again mswimmy!

"makes me wonder why I even bothered trying again in the first place."

That one got me there. I feel like that as well. Kind of hopeless..

Yep I agree it sucks and I wsh there was an easy way out, but we are forced to persevere and live until it is out time.

Doctors are the last people on earth that should be flaky, right? I'm glad you were making progress. We all encounter setbacks, hopefully you can find a new doctor soon. I saw you said you were on Adderall. Does it help a lot? I took it years ago, and it made me really grouchy and sleepy all the time. I haven't really found a med that works for my ADHD

Yeah you think they would be the last people to be flaky. But she fits that shoe well.

As far as adderall goes, I had a friend who has adhd give me a couple of his pills of adderall back when we were in highschool, but after meeting him I was like holy crap you are me and I am you, so I tried one and it was like a light switch had been flipped in my head, it was wonderful, so I kinda had an idea that it worked, my flaky doc had asked me if I had ever tried any and I said yeah adderall, she asked if I knew the dose, I said no, she well we will go with 20mg 1 time a day to start, well after that I just needed to increase the frequency, so we settled on 20mf X3 per day. It was wonderful, I finally productive and that I could actually get things done, I had patience i did not get frustrated as easy and could think. but for now those days are gone. It was nice while it lasted.

You it's like when i tried wearing my friends classes and I was like holy * I need to wear these 0.o. I didn't even notice my bad eye site. Four years later and my eye site got 7 times worse. (without glasses)