Selfish?

I can't help but seeing myself saying "me, myself and I" in every post that I have used in my first 5-7 post on here. I can't say that this one might be different.

My sister, who is selfish, calls me a spoiled little brat. I can't help but to question if she is right or is it her not being able to handle attention being drawn away from her? I was the youngest of three and she the oldest. Admitting that I have done selfish things but I'm not looking for a spotlight.

She has been the one who says I need to see a doctor, my mom had once been happy for me to be off medication but after my sister said anything about me and medication my mom changed her mind.

After all this I feel like I can't talk to them as then I might find myself going on a doctor visit I would rather not be on. I also don't want to talk with my friends or boyfriend as I'm not sure if they really understand where I am right now. That is a big reason why I feel somewhat alone on this matter in my life.

If I talk about it I'm worrying too much about any illness. If I speak with friends they just say it's how life is and I'll get over it. "It's a fact of life". I've learned how to sit still and enjoy the pages of a book or doing lines of computer code. I've learn how to need go off on things that don't really matter but I still do more often than I would like to say I do. My boyfriend sees all that and believes that I can't be ADD because I can sit for hours if I'm invested in the subject I'm handling.

I'm not really self-centered, at least try not to be and choose not to let it get the better of me. I even hate really being open on here as I'm not sure what kind of time I'll be able to give or if I'll be able to help others on here in the first place.

When I realized that one of the symptoms of ADHD was hyper-focusing on certain things I thought "No wonder I seem to spend too much time on the things I am interested in and not enough time on the things that will benefit me."

This is really difficult to explain to the people in my life that automatically assume what little they know about ADHD to be all-encompassing or "just growing up".

It sounds like the people in your life simply don't have a deep enough understanding of the symptoms of ADHD, and if you could sit them down and show them, they might get it a little better.

The statement you make of your boyfriend thinking you can't be ADD because you can invest hours into something your interested in or doing. That in itself is a trait of ADD. Hyperfocus. When in that state everything else that should be getting done does not even cross our minds. It is hard to explain to people who cannot experience. I just gotta keep fighting and move forward. People can see that as being selfish but really your just in the zone and getting things done.

Most of us are "here" on this site for help and support. I see no problem with that! One thing that I do here - I try to "give back" by reading others' posts to give support.

Family dynamics are so complex at times. *hugs*

I think that what makes us do things is the fact that if we are lucky enough to do what we are interested in, we should go for it and spend our time on things we enjoy learning about if we ever find our nich in life. My son is having problem deciding what to do with his time and life, nothing but music keeps him going, he plays electric guitar very well, but there really is no other things he is interested in, but he also is going through some mental illness seeming to come on worse lately. He is being seen by a doc and T for several things

I can kinda relate to that. I have been bouncing around form thing to thing. still searching. The things I like doing it is rarely possible to make money at. So I just bounce from job to job school to school getting various training.