Advice and experience

Hello all! I am searching desperately for some answers for my 7 year old daughter. She is in grade 2 and is struggling badly at school.. She has always been very smart, well behaved girl but in grade 2 her teacher said she had issues focusing and staying on task and being distracted/chatting. That she used noise blockers in class more than any other student.
This grade it is even worse, her comprehension of the work they do in class is little to none. Her teacher again said she can't focus and advised I get her tested for ADD.

This came as a huge shock to me. At home I don't have much problem with her focusing.. She likes to sit and write in her notepad, she can follow instructions etc.. She does have issues sitting down and focusing on eating dinner though, and can get very overly excitable and over bearing when we have guests at the house.

I guess I just want to speak to others with experience in this, on what types of things to look out for at home, tell tale signs of ADD. I do not want a random teacher pushing a wrong diagnosis.. I want to be sure, so I'm trying to reach out and learn as much as I can!!

Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance!!

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Usually school is where symptoms of ADHD are more noticeable. Every kid loses focus, can be chatty and get distracted and the same goes for Adults. The one and only ONE thing I will agree about the anti-ADHD crowd is that we all have some symptoms of ADHD to a degree. But for many people, like myself, it's when those symptoms get to the point where your quality of life is effected. ADHD is much more than the lack of focus and getting distracted. People with ADHD/ADD are often very intelligent with higher than average IQ's. Some do well in school others don't, like myself. We have a different way of processing information, our thought process is different. From your description of your daughter and her teachers observations she may be correct in her suggestion. In my opinion I would take your daughter to someone who is experienced and knowledgeable about ADHD, your family PCP may or may not be the best choice. You should first search your local area for a experienced child psychologist who's main focus is children with behavioral issues, Learning disabilities, and ADHD. It's a complicated disorder and needs to be treated by someone with extensive knowledge. There are numerous books available that would be very helpful to you in educating yourself about ADHD and that will be key if your daughter is diagnosed with it. This website has a section that lists many great books and other material. I would also limit asking other people about ADHD as everyone has different opinions and experiences, most of that comes from people who don't have it and the feedback can get very confusing. And the wrong advice could prevent your daughter from treating ADHD (if she is diagnosed) successfully. If it comes to it the treatment of medication can get overwhelming as there is a lot of bad information out their. I am 53, didn't get diagnosed until I was 38, prior to that my life was basically hell and I am still struggling from the damage it did. Medication changed my life for the better and have nothing negative to say about it. You will hear a lot of negative views about ADHD and medication. But look at it this way, if you had asthma, diabetes, heart issues ect. you would take medication so you can control these issues and live a quality life. No different with the brain and disorders like ADHD. I wish I had access to meds when I was a kid but when I was your daughters age little was known about the disorder and only a handful of doctors were knowledgeable about it. I know my life would have been much different if they had the knowledge back then that they have today. The first thing you need to to do is take your teachers advice and get your daughter test by someone that is experienced with ADHD and go from there. At the same time educate yourself, the more you know the easier it will be for the both of you. I will also point out that everyone with ADHD/ADD are not the same, that's what makes it more complicated. I like this quote from a Doctor (Hallowell) who has ADD and specializes in the treatment of the disorder. He said this to a young kid who just got diagnosed with ADHD, he said " A person with ADHD/ADD has the brain of a Ferrari, extremely powerful but has brakes that came from a bicycle. Hope this helps a little. And just to let you know having ADHD is not as bad as it sounds. It never bothered me knowing that I have it, it bothered me that I had something that was out of my control and had to wait until I was 38 to find out what it was.

Thank you so much for your reply!! I just want to get my daughter the help she needs so she can thrive in school and not feel left out. She is starting to notice the problems she is facing and that's what I want eased for her sake.
Brain health is something that I am deeply interested in and if medication can help her brain function like an average persons, I am all for it!!

I am very confused on where to start to be honest.. Her teacher seems off, we haven't clicked and I'm not sure her and my daughter have either. She doesn't seem interested in helping my daughter, more in proving that she's hard to teach. I'v seen our family doctor that ordered a full assessment for my daughter through the school, but her teacher said they won't do anything like that for another 2 years!
Do I let it go for 2 years? Do I push for just an ADD assessment? She said they will do that now..

I'v already had my fair share of biased ignorant views on the subject. Quite upset about it really...

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As the poster above said, many times symptoms don't start showing until attention is really put to the test, as in an academic environment. I don't mean to sound ignorant, but how high are the stakes in second grade? I know that you want to help her - and getting an accurate diagnosis takes time. If I were you, I would seek a private practitioner to administer the assessments necessary to make a diagnosis - a psychologist or a neuropsychologist or something of the like. Be aware though, that this can often cost a good amount of money and many of these people do not take insurance. However, the benefits are that you get an 'expedited' diagnosis. My sister was in the public school system and although she was struggling significantly in school, and was finally tested, they deemed her 'not far enough behind' to implement any accommodations or anything. Where I am from, it was policy to wait and see if the student has a 'severe' learning disability (meaning that they have fallen two years behind their peers).

Whatever you decide, I think that it's important to continually let her know that she is perfect just the way she is, and that you will love her regardless of her brain's differences. Of course you want to do your best to help her, but as someone who has a diagnosis, it's important to continually let her know that she isn't something that needs 'fixing', but helping.

Hi, I don't want to sound out of place but have you ever consider moving her to another class?, Im just wonder if theres not a small change that this is just a case of a wrong teacher situation. Having a kid who is in 5th grade now and since he was a baby I can notice somenthing was different with him, I can tell you from my own experience that whatever the case is, it's no worth having a teacher who is not supportive, who is making you feel that something is wrong and no willing to bring any help. And thinking that you are sending your daughter every day to spend time with a teacher that is making her feel out of place. Your story just made me think in a time when in the last meeting of the year with my sons teacher, after a year of trying medication, and getting emails of how awful he was being, she simply said that she never understood my soon because he was her first adhd case in 20 year carrer. I just wish I could known her toughs since the first day and do something. Every day spend with the wrong teacher is hell for everybody.

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If she is struggling look into getting a 504 plan or a IEP. (You will have to research what is more appropriate for your daughter as I don't know her) Each plan will require some kind of testing and can be used to get your daughter accommodations. If you don't think she is really that behind in school work and just needs some things modified ask the administration about a 504 plan.

If you look up your district you can usually find a webpage that discusses these things. Another thing you can do is talk to the school counselor.

My sister taught second grade last year and had several IEPs. There is extra paper work involved for the teacher so that may be why she's discouraging it. My sister said it could be hard too because you have to make more lesson plans with modified curricula.

Last is to look into sensory overload and see if your daughter gets triggered by particular things. She may have problems with noise/lights/textures/busy decorations etc. You could probably find out if she gets overwhelmed if you just ask her about different stuff and ask her how those situations make her feel. This can be comorbid with adhd.

i dont have much to add, besides its really important to have a professional opinion ... i was misdiagnosed as bipolar years ago and only until i quit seeing the psychiatrist and got a second opinion from a specialist psychologist was i diagnosed with ADHD (along with other things)

i do want to say that not always a student has to be behind in class... i was advanced for my classes until 6th grade when things got more difficult, had to remember more things, locker combinations, where the rooms were for different teachers, all of that became to much for me and i started seeing a dramatic drop in my grades.. from straight A's to C's and D's... i even used to be put in the local newspaper with other advanced students because of our honor rolls, was offered a scholarship in 4th-5th grade for when i graduated, they even wanted to skip me ahead 1 grade because i had been held back in 2nd grade (due to absences, i missed over 200 days probably..) but i still knew all the material, it was easy for me until the "heat" was turned up and i had more demanded from me... i ended up dropping out of school... if i had treatment for these disorders then i probably would of gone to college and everything ..

anyway, if there is any suspicion, i would definitely look into it with a specialist... it may not be ADHD, it could be dyslexia, or another disorder that can have similar effects in the class room

i wish you the best

My son was dx with ADD when he was 3 years old. He was also non verbal. We put him in special classes through the school district.

Not all special ed teachers help their kids in fact they can make them worse. I would have your child tested and not by the school. Once you get your report and the school wants to test your child then fine but get an independent test first

My son is very sweet and polite so if he said his figure hurt he did not have to do his work he got to play. That's not right. I observed a class a regular kindergarden class and the teacher was yelling at a little girl the little girl did not understand much english she was Hispanic. So the teacher yelled louder. I had a school official in the classroom with me watching and I gave her a look. During reading time 2 boys would get up and put water in their mouths and spit it at each other the teacher did nothing. If my so. Moved he got yelled at. That was the last day he spent in her class and she got into some trouble

I ended up have our state diagnostic center test him. At first they said he was not ADD and I calmly told them he had already taken his medicine. So the next day they said don't give him his medicine which I did not. Within 30 minutes they came out and said give him his medicine they could not believe it was the same kid.

Here is the issue. You will have to fight for your child. Get her tested and get an IEP plan or a 504 plan in place. If you live in the USA every school has to offer you these. I have had to fight a lot for my son. That one teacher is no longer allowed to have special needs kids in her class and his special needs teacher no longer teaches special needs.

Get on top of this now. Don't wait 2 years the sooner the better and if you need advice or to vent you can always PM me. My son has several problems and he is now 25 and I am still fighting for him. I hope you have a good support system.

my son is 25 too and is going through some bad depression episodes along with GAD. he is getting meds for them. i also thought in grammer school he was very intelligent, which he was. in 5th grade he was asked to if he wanted to skip to 6th grade as he was smart enough. now he's been through college and dropped out in his 3rd year because he can't focus. i myself am schitzoaffective and he think he himself is too, basically from having the experience of living with me, someone who has it.

to continue, he has seen several doctors and even took a class on medications and agreed to take his meds. i praise him for taking the meds, but am still worried about the affects they may have on him.

Thankyou all SO much for the feedback. I have spent the last 1-2 weeks pretty much interviewing everybody who comes into contact with my daughter about this. So I can gather as much info as I can and take it to her principle. (We meet next week to discuss everything)
I chose not to talk to her teacher anymore, she already has such a strong opinion on my daughter that I do not feel comfortable in doing any type of assessment with my daughter.

My biggest issue is... I have seriously self evaluated every bit of my daughter closely for the past 2 weeks. I have purposely been 'testing' her to get an idea of what her teacher is talking about.. And I don't see it AT ALL.
I have been giving multiple step directions and seeing if she can go ahead and complete herself without being harped on to stay on task and she has done so with ease!
Tonight, without being asked, she organized 22 Valentine's Day gift bags for her entire class, wrote all the cards and labeled every bag. Yet her teacher says she doesn't take initiative in class and cannot complete tasks.
We have had visitors and my daughter has kept her cool, been polite, not overly excited.
She completes homework with ease, she completes chores etc..

I just don't see what her teacher is talking about .. She doesn't exhibit any of the issues at home as she does in class. But I have seen with my own eyes that she is STRUGGLING in class. She is struggling to even comprehend the work!

Is it possible to be completely fine at home, but show the symptoms at school and still have ADHD?

I would honestly change class to be completely sure as I'm not fond of the teacher, but she is in French immersion. There is only 1 class each grade, 1 school in town that offers this.
I completely regret putting her in French immersion, but I am told switching her now to English would mean she would be seriously behind in English now.. Ugh.
I'm so confused...

We are in Canada, i haven't heard of the 504 plan, i plan on getting to the bottom of things and learning exactly what the best thing to do for my daughter when I talk to the principle next week.



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http://www.childmind.org/en/posts/ar...ct-kids-school this is a bit on sensory stuff

Is she getting bullied? Is the teacher picking on her?

Does she have problems with reading comprehension? Is she at her grade level? (Maybe have her read to you outloud?) or mixes up numbers/struggles with math? Maybe a learning disability?

She might have anxiety and does not feel particularly comfortable around the teacher. She might have problems with performance anxiety or anxiety in general.

Look up physical symptoms of anxiety. You can ask her if she ever has stuff like sweaty palms/stomach aches etc in class.

There are a lot of things that could contribute that you can't see because you're not in class with her.

The only real way to know would be to have her evaluated and that can be expensive.

Hello. There is no such thing as a 504 plan in Canada. That's only in the states. The only thing offered is an IEP. It is not likely she has ADHD if things are fine at home in terms of symptoms. Make sure to check for learning disabilities because they can mimic ADHD symptoms. Does she do badly in one subject? Does she refuse to do one subject at home? This may look like ADHD if it's a common thing like reading or writing. Talking to the school about getting her an IEP would be good. Get tested by yourself because in Canada it takes three years to get testing done and it's not a good quality assessment either. It does cost a lot (2-3k). Insurance may cover some. Canada's health plan doesn't though. You need to get it done through a psychologist privately for a psychoeducational assessment, which tests for learning disorders, ADHD, giftedness, basically everything. That's why it's so much. Anyways, I know the process because I got myself an IEP and I'm in Canada, though mines for anxiety. Hope this helps .

Social anxiety disorder, GAD, OCD, and panic attacks

Lexapro, 10 mg

My son was diagnosed with ADHD when he was in 2nd grade. I say let the school test your daughter if they want to. I find that the teachers push the parents into giving kids meds because it makes life easier for the teacher, rather than having to deal with disruptive kids.

I had started giving my son medication because I was worried about him not passing the standardized testing, which he got top scores on. He told me that he doesn't feel like himself on the medicine and has no sense of humor, just feels sad and empty. I took him right off the meds.

He's in 7th grade now and doing fine. Has a pretty mild case, doesn't need meds.

I would sooner take her out of French immersion before I gave her meds.