[Qeeper]

Hey Y'all,

Recently I read a book called Women With Attention Deficit Disorder. Overall it was an informative and helpful read, although I do have some reservations about its assumptions. I actually had bought it for someone else whom I believe is likely to have ADD. The problem is that she seems to me much more of the impulsive type, with frequent bursts of anger and frustration, constant multitasking, excessive talking filled with tangents, and general impulsivity in nearly all tasks. I have known her for decades, and this is how she has always been.

While she is overall reasonably organised with possessions, she does keep a lost of lists, plus she is very stubborn about any potential changes in her daily routines. On the other hand, she seems quite bad with sequencing complex tasks into smaller steps. She basically avoids any task that involves say more than five steps. When in college, she often expressed that it took her far longer than others to complete homework, and I can tell you she is not lacking in general intelligence. She also has strong avoidance of telephone or socialising (outside of Online). Moreover, she rarely reads directions before starting a task, often resulting in frustration and failure. In general, she gets bored and gives up on things very quickly. She is the most impulsive female that I know.

My question is thus: Is there a better book than the one I mentioned above for adult females who may have impulsive type ADD?

P.S. Funds are limited, and she is very much against seeing doctors or other professionals except when absolutely necessary, so starting with a book appears to be a better option.

[CANDC]

hi Qeeper. Welcome to Psych Central. Sorry you cannot find reasonably priced books on this topic. the library is my free source of books.

And youtube can help a lot too
https://tinyurl.com/ybsflqm8

[Skeezyks]

Hello Qeeper: I noticed this is your first post here on PCC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

I'm sorry I'm not familiar with books on the subject of women with ADD. However here are links to several articles, from PsychCentral's archives, on the subject of women & ADHD. Perhaps some of the information in them can be of some help. Most also contain links to additional sources of information you may wish to check out:

https://psychcentral.com/blog/the-se...men-with-adhd/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/strate...men-with-adhd/

https://psychcentral.com/resources/A...upport_Groups/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/women-...-in-their-way/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/adhd-...hyperactivity/

[Qeeper]

Thanks for the replies thus far.

Just to clarify, when I mentioned funds being limited, I was referring to more expensive options like therapy. Buying books is no problem. The time required for each read, on the other hand, is more important, hence why I cannot realistically go reading every book on the topic. If someone out there has, their wisdom would be most appreciated.

My main intent was to find the advice of someone who has actually been in this particular situation -- involving a female who may have impulsive ADD. The book I read (Women With Attention Deficit Disorder) had a lot of good tips for a woman with inattentive type, but the impulsive type was not in focus. One thought that came to mind is that perhaps a standard ADD book intended for the classical impulsive male with ADD might work, although I imagine it would lack some of the female-specific considerations like those in the aforementioned book.

[Llama_Llama44]

Well, as frustrating as it is, if she is not interested in getting help, then I'm not sure how much telling her to read a book would help. Books for ADHD are kind of funny, cause a lot of people with ADHD have trouble reading or at least focusing on a book that isn't exciting... if someone gave me a book like that, I doubt I would read the whole thing, unless it somehow REALLY engaged me.

Also, you really haven't mentioned why you think she needs help. Maybe you don't like some of her traits, but you haven't said anything about her struggling or being in pain about any of this. If she is, then I would imagine it would be more helpful to talk to her about what might help, and see if she is interested in suggestions.

I'm not saying a book could never be helpful in her situation. Despite being a woman with ADHD, I can't give you any recommendations cause I've never read one

Edit: I reread about the outbursts of anger and frustration... keep in mind that ADHD is often accompanied by other mental health issues. And many disorders can have overlapping symptoms. As you said, it would be best if she saw a professional, if she actually sees this as a problem.

[Qeeper]

Originally Posted by Llama_Llama44

Well, as frustrating as it is, if she is not interested in getting help, then I'm not sure how much telling her to read a book would help ...

To my knowledge, she has little if any knowledge or awareness of ADHD and its symptoms. I have not yet mentioned to her that I believe she may have it, as I know that coming out and saying something like that to someone lacking knowledge on the subject can be off-putting and may just build a wall of denial. I feel that talking about disorders can be like talking about an addiction. In my case, I have read three ADHD books at this point in my life. I have also an old friend who was diagnosed at an early age with ADHD.

Every one of the books I have read on the subject has been engaging, and I would think that most individuals with ADHD would find at least some of the books engaging, especially if the book describes the same type of ADHD that the reader has. Generally speaking, validation makes a person feel good, and a book that describes personal problems of the reader in detail offers validation.

On the topic of being able to sit and read a book, the woman in question has read many story books and also some college textbooks. I imagine she has the capacity and self-restraint to read a book if it seems interesting. I completely agree that a boring book would likely be unfit. This is why I am seeking a book that fits what I perceive to be her specific condition, or at least something close.

From those ADHD books I have read thus far, they seem to have a chapter or so near the beginning which is essentially there to self-screen. This allows a person to have an idea up-front on whether the book may be worth their while. I was thinking it may be a good idea to mention these chapters at the onset so as to avoid the perceived stress of having a whole book thrown at oneself.

She has very often expressed frustration and perceived self-failure and inability to keep up with peers or get things done in a timely manner. One thing I do feel confident about is that she is not happy with how she or her life is going. Furthermore, her lack of follow-through with solving problems troubles me and others, often leaving me to solve her problems for her. If I could give her the impetus to begin solving her own life problems, I feel that would be really useful for everybody. Again, her problem is not lack of intelligence but more a lack of follow-through and plan execution.

[Llama_Llama44]

Perhaps check out the ADHD subreddit. It is more active than the ADHD forum here.