Childhood ASD

I'm wondering if there's anyone that was diagnosed early for ASD or was born this way? Did anyone outgrow symptoms or develop new ones over time? Does occupational therapy or speech therapy even work or do anything? I really could use support and answers. My daughter has ASD and I can't help but worry and wonder what could lie ahead of her and for us. I know the "When you've met 1 person with autism, you've met 1 person with autism" bit but..I could really use helpful support.

I teach children with ASD and it really really is true that saying about meeting 1 person with Autism. Although it is a life-long condition interventions and therapies can improve things for people on the spectrum. I have seen MASSIVE reductions in challenging behaviours, speaking and listening skills, independence skills through interventions that we have put in place. One child who couldn't access the mainstream class, spent most of the day in meltdown and with few spoken words (though good receptive language) is now in class full time, sometimes without support, speaking in full sentences. However there are still barriers to learning for her. My job is to look at the barriers to learn and put strategies into place to support the children so they can access the mainstream curriculum. Some children have real sticking points for example knowing routines and though we have worked so much on independence and put many strategies into place we haven't seen a real improvement. Other areas like reading/ verbal skills are fantastic in this child. So the spiky profile is true. It's easy for me to see this as a professional rather than a parent, though I have a close friend whose daughter has autism so have seen it from her point of view too. I think the children all have their strengths and weaknesses like any children. I think the stereotypes of autism don't apply to the children I have taught- they are all caring, want friends. I think the parents that seem to cope the best are the ones who are fully accepting of their child as they are and are willing to accept help from wherever possible. One things that does concern me is the number of dodgy looking interventions that are out there eg diets that claim to cure autism. There is a website called researchautism.net that rates these interventions that is worth looking at. The NAS website is very good. (UK). Get all the help you can and support you can. If you want to know anything specific I don't mind pointing you in the right direction. I know it's all easy for me to say as she's not my child so please forgive me if I inadvertently cause any offence or worry for you. But I really would like to help. I love my job and love the children I work with and have seen for most of them huge improvements but it does depend on the severity of the condition in each individual case. Sending hugs.

There are some good blogs to be found online by Mothers with one (or more) children with Autism.

There is so much variety so that it is hard to say about the level of self-sufficiency vs support that your daughter will need over her life.

If she gets appropriate supports and the loving care that she needs she could really go on to exceed anybodies hopes for her.

Things like speech therapy and occupational (e.g., play, motor skills) therapy can be very helpful, yes. Depends a lot on the skill of the practitioner. There is a lot of stuff to be found online, again, so you could try things out yourself, too.

Thank you both for responding. My daughter was born this way and so I've been around it all for awhile. Her speech is virtually non existent and she doesn't seek out affection. She has no idea about self preservation or safety or consequences. I guess I was hoping to hear positive outcomes from people that are autistic. I accept her and love her for who she is. I just worry and want her to live a full wholesome life but never see things that acknowledge that its even possible in blogs. Theyre all about the struggle, but is there a positive outcome? Can therapies work to make her FEEL better? Sorry this is long or if I'm in the wrong section

I am diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder(aspergers to be exact), was never diagnosed as a kid and never had any support for it....though got plenty of bullying at school which helped develop my anxiety and depression. Anyways I did ok academically in school, I did graduate....though before I graduated an incident happened which caused me PTSD. In spite of all that I still tried to go to college but it ended up being too much stress and I felt very isolated, so dropped out...I tried again in community college but by then I think I had really burnt myself out so dropped out again.

I now have SSI income, still live at home right now...but am looking into moving out into subsidized housing, so maybe getting an apartment in the next couple years. I am not functional enough to hold a job but that doesn't mean I will never find a way aside from SSI but for now that is what I depend on for income. Now my situation is also effected by the depression, anxiety and PTSD I also have. Generally speaking having support and a caring parent/parents/family really can help functioning in an individual...not having that can make things worse.

Never mind. I just cannot express what I want to say.

What are you refering to didgee?

I was referring to three things. I have difficulty putting my thoughts in words. I also fear coming across as offensive and preachy. I also didn't notice you posted a second time before I replied. After I read your second post, I felt my suggestions weren't appropriate for your situation so I deleted my reply. Anyway I have ASD, not autism, so it wouldn't have been very helpful.

Sorry for all this.

Its ok, didn't see any reply except the one saying never mind. Thanks for reading, anyways

Not sure what she can and cannot do but... the MAIN thing intervention should bring is that the child will feel more in control and less just being in a lost boat the sea carries to unknown places.

If the child does not see a point in communication , it can be because that he/she did not yet connects it with a result. Teaching communication, being it speak, cards or sign language should be focused on how the child can change her surroundings. It can be a simple choice between chocolate or strawberry milk. If the child learns some kind of communication, he/she will feel calmer inside, because they feel they have a say.

Then there are always different "keys" to reaching an autistic child. Some don't make sense to me and some do. Intervention should be aimed at building up the child and less aimed at pleasing parents. Because intervention can be a more than fulltime job for a child and I question the intensity in some programs, sure they can give you results but at the same time to high intensity is probably trauma forming.

It's a fine line.

Jimi, I agree with your post. However, I have yet to speak or chat with anyone that has said occupational therapy makes a difference. Speech therapy is a no brainer that its important, I'm aimed at what all this means *for her*. Would this actually make her feel better or are these programs designed to make the parents feel better? So that they can say they're "doing something" about their child's condition? Is it so wrong to accept them the way they are *without* dragging them to somewhere the parent and child don't want to be? Is it worth it? Does this get better?

Hi there, I've been following this thread though I've not felt I had any valid feedback to provide thus far so haven't posted. I just wanted to say on that particular question; It is never wrong for a parent to accept their child exactly as they are. I actually admire you for asking that though as it shows you're not just one of these parents who has an overzealous sense of how their child 'should' be. Parents like that get under my skin.

Since ASD is a life long condition all of us on the spectrum have had it since we were born, though some of us didn't get diagnosed as children for varying reasons (in my case the diagnosis didn't even exist until I was already in high school, by which point nobody was looking for it). However, like all Humans, we all grow up differently. Some people with an ASD can grow up to become pretty functional in the world, whilst sadly others grow up becoming more and more introverted because the world can be so unforgiving of difference. I think the best thing any of us could hope for is being made to feel like it's OK to be who we are and be made to feel safe in our own skin.

I hope that makes sense.

Thank you for posting Ross. I'm not sure what I expected people to post here, but your post made me feel a lot better. Sometimes parents just want to hear everything will be ok and that its ok to feel worried for our kids (especially special needs children). I just want the best life for her that will make *her* happier or make a difference for her in a good way. I feel that a lot of "services" or "therapies" are more geared toward making parents feel better or trying to "fix" the kids. My daughter isnt broken, whats to "fix"?

I'm glad it was able to make you feel better. I can understand what you mean about parents worrying, I'm 29 and was diagnosed just a few years back but I still live with my mum and I think she took the diagnosis harder than I did.

Services and therapies seem to be there to make a child more socially acceptable to reduce teasing etc. I went to speech therapy and hated it, because it focused on my "flawed" speech rather than on me. It was one of many experiences that taught me I was different and in need of repair.

You get it. She definitely doesn't need to be fixed. Society needs to be fixed, not us.

So many people with ASD have wounds because of good intentions gone wrong. It would be better if people actually accepted and valued us.

I don't understand why people think the way they do. I always get the "im so sorry" response when I *had* to share her diagnosis. Wtf, I'm not sorry. She's an amazing little girl, she makes everyone smile. Her speech is limited, but she can say "Hi!" And jump up and down and she does this to *everyone everywhere* we go.I overheard a lady yesterday that told her young daughter that if everyone was like my baby, the world would be a better place. All I could think is, then why is everyone trying to "fix" her? True, Im not crazy about the echolalia, I hate that I was the bad guy getting her used to water (her sensory was crazy sensitive to water), and I don't understand the tantrums sometimes. But doesn't everyone have quirks others wouldn't like? Aaaaaaaah. Rant over. I feel a movement for acceptance rather than fixing autism/ASD/aspergers would be more beneficial.

Hello, my Son was diagnosed with asd late last year. He is 12 now and it was an uphill struggle to get his diagnosis confirmed even though I knew from preschool that something wasn't quite right. Although it has frightened me to realise that he is autistic, it is a relief to know the truth now. I blamed his actions on bad behaviour for years and felt guilty and blamed myself for being a terrible parent because we constantly screamed at each other. My son was unteachable (junior school) due to being unable to interact socially and fell behind in all subjects. Was a very angry boy who lashed out verbally and physically and had no remorse to his actions. He now attends mainstream high school and is excelling in all subjects. I found inner peace as a parent by understanding my son's disability via forums, talking to other likeminded parents and by reading books wrote by others with autistim. I recommend you read The reason I jump. My son is very sensory so I filled his room with lava lamps, bubble lamps, and he loves his fish tank all of which I purchased quite cheaply on ebay. There are lots of toys, lamps etc that will create a calming sanctuary for your child. I am extremely proud of my son's achievements and I'm proud of who he is. So what if my son cannot look me in the eye. So what if he cannot show his emotions. I have decided that as long as he feels safe he will be happy. Routine is extremely important and should be rigid so ensure that you adhere to this continuall. I wish you all the best. Please feel free to contact me anytime if you need someone to talk to. Kind regards Lolo x

yup, each person with autism is different. but i think i was born this way, or it happened between the time my bio mother went into labor and once i came into this world.. there were a lot of complications. also my nuerologist thinks that the scar tissue in my brain scans were there since birth. i acted to seem like i outgrew them, but i didnt. actually somethings have gotten worse. but other things have either stayed the same, or gotten a little better. speech therapy had a great impact on me. i went from barking and making sounds to communicating some verbally. still a hard thing, but also meds have helped me in communication (mainly stimulants) but when i was a kid, i had some really bad reactions to them (i cried as soon as it kicked in, and didnt stop until it left my system - after i was about 8yr it turned into one long meltdown every dose. but its weird.. maybe something after puberty and all that, thats made my reaction to it a lot more better.?
Sometimes certain foods make it harder for me to cope during the day. but thats different for everyone too.
sometimes vaccines can cause it (if its caused by an autoimmune system disorder reaction to the vaccines).

a dog or pet that she might bond with could be really helpful too. there are a lot of service dog organizations out there for children with autism.

if i could change one thing about growing up with autism, it would be that people would of had a better understanding and had compassion and patience. meds are just experimental, and caused problems with me early on. i would of wanted to be accepted for me, and for it to be okay for me to be me.

also, just wanted to add, a lot of people thought my meltdowns were fits and tantrums. but they werent controllable, and to the person on the outside they dont really know why the kid is throwing a fit (and the reason being is that its not based on "its not fair!" or out of anger. it happens because the brain cant take all the sounds, smells, touches, clutter, etc. that is currently overwhelming the senses... i often got spanked for it, or yelled at, which made it even worse because it was only adding to the sensory overload attack on the brain and nerves.)

(i also hated water.. i also hated kiwis and other foods (i liked the taste but the way they felt in my mouth, i couldnt handle it.)
i also fought about brushing my teeth.. so much that my parents finally gave up on that fight once i was a teenage... i hated certain clothes, and would often chew my way out of them if i was stuck and no one was taking me out of them. i cant handle the feeling that comes from having the toenails or finger nails clipped..
things that were sprung on me caused troubles. also when i wasnt clear on what others expected of me and for what and why, i had difficulty. routine helps a lot with me now. even tho a lot of parents view "routine" as "chores". it simply can be, waking up every day at the same time. or play a certain game for a certain amount of time.. of course theres likely going to be not so enjoyable things in that routine, but hopefully its not full of chores.
at my age now (28yr) the med im on in the morning helps greatly with communication. for example the other night (really late) my med was barely in my system anymore. and i shared a fwd from on of my bills i paid and all i could get into words and typed up was "i did that. " and "i did card". it was a very poor communication, but it was my best effort/strength that i could do. then this morning when my med kicked in, i went back and rewrote it and explained in more detail, and stuff.

Not so sure those are entirely different things...you can't really have ASD without being on the autism spectrum and thus having autism at least that is the way I understand it.

It was bad wording. I'm not an expert. I need to very careful in threads like this, because I have never ever been a parent.

My reply was based solely on my own experience. My ASD (in childhood) wasn't as 'pronounced' as the girl being discussed in this thread so I felt it wasn't really may place to give advice.

The thanks in your post are confusing. What exactly are you being thanked for? It feels like I'm being ganged up on.

Sorry, my intention was to never make you feel ganged up on. thanks is a good thing. i was thanking because of the content you put in the post and also because i have troubles with words and communications too, and while its a sucky complication, im very thankful to know someone who truely knows what thats like.

I wanted to ask how a mother can tell if her asperger's son is depressed or has anxiety.

What does it "feel"like to someone who feels emotions differently?

I am trying to get an appt. with a psychiatrist, but it often can take a long time to get in to see one.

I have not sorted what was Asperger's, depression, anxiety or other, but I think for me signs would have been isolating (more than normal), losing interest in things, laying around doing nothing.

It depends on how old the child is and what his personality is like normally. You can start a new thread to ask your question and get more replies.