Sometimes nonverbal

When I am stressed I sometimes lose the ability to talk. Does anyone else experience this?

Dear SQLVR,

I do. It is distressing to me. How does it affect you?

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen

Yeah I do to the point people have thought I have selective mutism. I only talk freely to 2 people. My mom and my therapist. Even close family members I can’t talk to unless I’m asked a question and even then it’s usually just a one word answer or sentence or a grunt.

I can answer questions when I am spoken to so like at restaurants I’m ok ordering. But my mom has to do stuff on the phone for me.

Online I’m great and I can deal with customer service reps and all sorts of people. I like to describe myself as “business in the front, party in the back”

Does it bother me? Yes it does. I feel like I’m being rude and people think I don’t like them when that’s not the case. I often cannot physically talk. My vocal chords almost freeze or something. I’m worried about returning to work after 15 months.

I have Autism, SM and SA.


I also have Auditory Processing Issues and was taught sign language years ago which helped cos I could access interpreters


I can talk to immediate family and my dog. I used to be able to talk to more but since I've been in the peri-menopause and then shielding for 18 months I struggle with having to talk to strangers unexpectedly again.

Tinks

My inability to talk is related to increased social anxiety at meetings or in large groups of people. If I’m at a meeting of more than 4 persons, I will freeze up and barely want to say anything. So I can say maybe a few things and am unable to speak in more detail like I would prefer to be able to. If it is a meeting not about work, I’m still nervous to say much in a group, but it’s not as stress inducing. Work gives me quite a bit of stress and did have pressure from my mom early in my career to go into some jobs that were not me at all.

Hey, thank you for your post. I am new to these forums and am a single/separated 33 year old mother of autistic 3 yeat old twins. My son, is non verbal and I am waiting on a diagnosis appointment to recieve more in person help for them and to gain the knowledge of the tools I need to help them grow. My son though non verbal, can say only a few words and makes a lot of loud noises to try and communicate. I know my son (my daughter can talk and is getting better at phrasing sentences) and I know exactly what hes saying without him needing to say it. I know his language. But what I'm wondering if you're willing to talk about it is what it was like for you as an infant and as you grew older. Your frustrations, things or strategies that helped in general while growing up? I am trying my best, but I want to know everything I can. I think you are a wonderful person to put your story here to help others too. Any advice is appreciated and thank you

Tessa

Yes, this happens to me when I'm very hurt, angry, or depressed I struggle to express what I'm feeling and become catatonic for the most part. I also lose the ability to talk in social work settings and some group settings but that feels a little different in these settings I feel like a whisper stuck in my throat with the other one it's like nothing exists in my mouth, throat, body to make a voice come out.

Yes, I’m autistic and often lose the ability to speak when I’m stressed or anxious, it’s similar to others’ descriptions of their vocal cords freezing. My mouth just stops working, it’s very frustrating.

In large groups, I sometimes freeze and don't say anything...

I can’t do large groups at all either, I just freeze, it’s like there are too many different conversations going on and I can’t process quickly enough. I don’t like parties for many reasons but whenever I did have to do them I’d seek a quiet corner.

Yes, this is when I am told to get in a van, or a car, and take a small bag to a hospital. Sometimes its so minute, no one notices, but most of the time it's right before some request I obviously cannot verbalize saying NO or STOP or ANYTHING. Freezing is not an option, and yet it happens all the time. I can type for a week straight, but there are times my mind dissociates so bad, it does not stay here, even if I don't move or speak.

I feel ya.

My psychiatric/family team mentioned I might potentially have autism, had it as a young child, have some kind of aspergers now, and I have no idea wtf that means...other than I have a lot of problems communicating with people in real life. Everyone seems to use a different language, and very few people want to discuss honest feelings, so half the time I don't bother, it only upsets people. WOW it's Easter, yay! Happy Spring celebrations American or otherwise...

Try to remember something that nobody told me as a kid: if you are autistic or have asperger's, that is not madness, that is in my humble opinion an adaptive ability to defend yourself in many situations. Freezing might just be the one that sucks the must to endure.

I only talk when I feel there is no threat (ie. criticism, rejection) so I only talk to my therapist and doctor (but I recently stopped therapy). I stopped talking at 13 due to dissociation-I couldn't talk at all. I feel extremely weird when I talk like I'm not human.