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Member
Member Since Feb 2014
Location: texas, USA
Posts: 64
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Nov 08, 2014 at 01:35 PM
#1
So...for the past month or so, maybe more, I've been confused as to what my reality truly is.
I'm in a relationship and I'm not sure what his true feeling are even when he tells me. To me the actions and words just don't match up. And we're at such a distance that the communication is just not comfortable. Does any one else get really uncomfortable with them selves that they are not sure to trust their instincts any more? I know I have major issues and I'm just not sure about my perception any more. Before it was just with my personal relationship that I had to second think my thoughts and instincts.but now some thing will happen in public and I'll get uncomfortable and think "oh no" I just did some thing or said some thing foolish, they are thinking that I'm crazy right now" It's so uncomfortable, and I'm so alone with my thoughts. There are people in my life that would call them selves great support.in reality they aren't for me. It feels like they are there if it's convenient. And I don't talk really to any friends that I have because I have made such mistakes with that in the past as far as making enemies of friends because I share in home business and it just turns into a mess,,,, that's besides the point... Can any one related to this and diss any one have any advice? |
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Perpetually Pondering
Community Liaison
Member Since Apr 2013
Location: New England
Posts: 46,298
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Nov 08, 2014 at 05:55 PM
#2
Sometimes with significant others, it gets utterly complicated. I find being very specific about behaviors that upset me, and then tying in why, what from my past and what it will take to resolve that unfilled feeling, is as close to as good as I can get it, without appearing judging of their character,without attacking and without appearing insecure or giving a catch 22 impression. It's a process, getting there. I completely understand the words/actions point you make.
Having people that say they'll help, but don't. Learned in grieving it's a mere polite expression, yet, hurtful no less. You aren't alone in your struggles. Be gentle in self judgment, assuming others reactions are as result of you, can be a slippery slope. 
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