Seeking Therapy

Birdie20 · Feb 26, 2022 at 02:30 PM

Hello,

This is my first time posting here. I haven't been officially diagnosed yet, honestly I'm hoping you guys can help give me the courage to make an appointment with a psychologist.

I'm 27 and I've been gradually avoiding more and more social situations basically my whole life but it took a sharp turn for the worse when I tried to go to college and ended up quitting when I was 18. So almost 10 years and the loneliness and sadness are becoming more and more unbearable. I'm so desperate for help but because it has been so long it just seems so impossible to do anything.

I've found a psychologist that seems very nice and possibly a good fit but I'm having a hard time getting myself to actually make the call and schedule a time to see her. Is there anyone out there whose had success?

Thank you for listening & sharing. ❤

CANDC · Feb 27, 2022 at 01:25 PM

Hi @Birdie20 - welcome to MSF My Support Forums. I am glad you are finding a psychotherapist that seems like a good fit. It is not easy to admit I need help, but when something is disrupting my life, I think my anxiety is not to be believed. I think at that point I need to give it a try and see how it goes.

If it helps, you could write down all the scenarios in your head, your fears of what might happen when you actually see a psychotherapist. I find when I do that, that most of the reasons are just anxious thoughts and not likely events.

One thing that I find is guaranteed is when I do nothing when things are bad, things do not get better. They usually get worse. That keeps me from freezing and prompts me to start taking action.
@CANDC

Birdie20 · Mar 01, 2022 at 04:21 PM

@CANDC

Thank you for your reply, that really is great advice. I like that "my anxious thoughts are not to be trusted" because I am definitely my own worst enemy sometimes and get in my own way.

I think that my worst fear is that I will have a bad experience and that will make me not ever want to go back to therapy and I know at this point it's my only hope. I guess all that means though is that I have to find the courage to keep fighting to get better even if it makes me uncomfortable.

I will try to list my fears and keep telling myself that they're not realistic. The worst part for me will probably be the time leading up to the first appointment. If I can get through that maybe I can sort this thing out.

CANDC · Mar 01, 2022 at 06:48 PM

@Birdie20 - glad you appreciated my comments.

I did not mean to imply that therapy is all or nothing. I think therapy can help lead me on a path to feeling better but one session only starts the ball rolling so to speak. I need to start new routines that help me get out of my funk. Exercise, yoga or walking help increase my energy level. Depression in me is a lack of energy. Doing those things gets my energy on a positive track.

What I eat really affects me too. I find carbs and sweets give me an instant boost and a couple hours later I want to sleep or I feel tired or blah.

Mindfulness is making great gains in credibility as a tool to help. Healthy Minds is a free app by the University of Wisconsin that takes 5-10 minutes a day and I feel better after I do that. One more routine that sets me in the right direction.

So if you want to start now you could start any of those life style changes and that may even help reduce your anxiety. Then it is not all on therapy. You have a way that you can work back to feeling better.

@CANDC

Birdie20 · Mar 04, 2022 at 06:38 PM

@CANDC

Yeah, I guess maybe I'm being a bit dramatic when I say that therapy is my only hope it's just that it's been such a long time of me avoiding pretty much everyone and everything and I'm so isolated that I feel hopeless a lot so thinking of therapy as the thing that would finally help me is a way I suppose im trying to motivate myself to finally go, and to have hope that it can get better with help.

That app sounds cool and I'll definitely check it out. I do cope with all the loneliness and anxiety in unhealthy ways including overeating, especially junk food. At the moment I'm trying again to start being healthier, I've been walking and eating better. The underlying issues for me though are so overwhelming but I certainly am trying to help myself and i know even seeing a therapist, she cant fix me. It has to be me putting in the effort. I just hope that with someone kind of guiding me and giving me some tools I can turn this thing around.

CANDC · Mar 04, 2022 at 08:06 PM

@Birdie20 - A friend told me that cut out sugar and cut down on carbs and increased protein and they are feeling better. I have found that to help too.

You are right that it is up to us to put in the effort. Even small things can be a help. I try to take one thing on my "really needs to happen list" and do it every day

Even coming on MSF is a positive step. Keep coming back.
@CANDC

sarahsweets · Mar 05, 2022 at 01:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CANDC

@Birdie20 - glad you appreciated my comments.

I did not mean to imply that therapy is all or nothing. I think therapy can help lead me on a path to feeling better but one session only starts the ball rolling so to speak. I need to start new routines that help me get out of my funk. Exercise, yoga or walking help increase my energy level. Depression in me is a lack of energy. Doing those things gets my energy on a positive track.

What I eat really affects me too. I find carbs and sweets give me an instant boost and a couple hours later I want to sleep or I feel tired or blah.

Mindfulness is making great gains in credibility as a tool to help. Healthy Minds is a free app by the University of Wisconsin that takes 5-10 minutes a day and I feel better after I do that. One more routine that sets me in the right direction.

So if you want to start now you could start any of those life style changes and that may even help reduce your anxiety. Then it is not all on therapy. You have a way that you can work back to feeling better.

@CANDC

Hey @CANDC these are the two apps in the iPhone App Store and neither mentioned Wisconsin. Are one of these what you are talking about?

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

AliceKate · Mar 05, 2022 at 02:07 PM

Is it an option to write a mail instead of calling? I would always opt for that, as it gives me the time to collect my thoughts and place them more-or-less structured in the content of a short email. When I found my T, I wrote him a (very) brief description of my main issues and why I thought he had a suitable profile. No more than 10 sentences, probably less, in all.

CANDC · Mar 05, 2022 at 02:23 PM

@sarahsweets I went to the Apple Store and this is the one that works in Iphone Healthy Minds Program on the App Store

Yes sorry University of Wisconsin is not mentioned.

The Google Play store has the app here Healthy Minds Program on the App Store

Hope this helps. I am on my third or fourth month and I look forward to my morning "visits" with the app.

sarahsweets · Mar 06, 2022 at 03:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CANDC

@sarahsweets I went to the Apple Store and this is the one that works in Iphone Healthy Minds Program on the App Store

Yes sorry University of Wisconsin is not mentioned.

The Google Play store has the app here Healthy Minds Program on the App Store

Hope this helps. I am on my third or fourth month and I look forward to my morning "visits" with the app.

Ive got to try something. Currently im trying to work on my insomnia. My sleep doctor said thqt i “barely” have sleep apnea. He still is making me try the cpap machine. I’m on my third mask. The first two were nose ones and it just pressed against my sinuses. I had to pay out pf pocket for a full face one-80$ but that’s still cheaper than what my insurance or other medical supply stores would charge and they had one to try on ( over a mask). Anyway I fought with my insurance to keep the machine and not be charged for it due to “noncompliance “.he had my take a cbt course which i felt was a waste of my time. But i just bought a workbook off of Amazon and. Sleep journal. If someone has insomnia they aren’t supposed to lay in bed thinking. Beds are for sleep and sex he says. So if I’m having an insomnia bout am I supposed to walk around with this machine so i don’t get in trouble?? Sorry to hijack. Anyhow i have to try other times things so you are kind to share the app.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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