[nirmal]

Hello everybody,

As I improve what really stands out is most of the hospitalisations were
mainly because of a med OD. It was sometimes intential, mostly because I was trying to feel better and self-treat.

Has anybody else been through this and what did you do? I now have a weekly pill reminder that assures I take my med appropriately and maybe more importantly, my husband and pdoc are on "stand-by" should I experience a shift in moods, which was why at those shifts I would start to overmedicate.

Any input will help.

thanks,
nirmal

[amaviena]

Anytime I start to feel strange, I hand over my pills and anything I could use to hurt myself. It's a good way to protect yourself.

[paddym22]

Needing to self medicate usually indicates either of two things

A) your current meds are insufficent and need to be adjusted

B) you are addicted to some medications

If you are going down the path that I did and used too many benzos in crisis situation, the actual therapeutic effects of the benzos will reduce and you end up taking more and more until such a time that you will need a detox and will not be prescribed these meds anymore in the future.

I hope that you are not upping the doses of anti psychotics, depressants or mood stabilisers that would be equally dangerous and well..........

Speak to your pdoc and be honest that you do self medicate and he can correspondingly look at what he can and cannot tweak to alleviate your suffering.

Take Care

[nirmal]

No, you misundersrand. I said "as I improve" and am Now aware of what I did in my Past, etc. I am aware of it now and have no intention of doing so. I merely asked what You did! I have no benzos and no desire for them only for extreme urgency and only a few at a time!

nirmal


]Needing to self medicate usually indicates either of two things

A) your current meds are insufficent and need to be adjusted

B) you are addicted to some medications

If you are going down the path that I did and used too many benzos in crisis situation, the actual therapeutic effects of the benzos will reduce and you end up taking more and more until such a time that you will need a detox and will not be prescribed these meds anymore in the future.

I hope that you are not upping the doses of anti psychotics, depressants or mood stabilisers that would be equally dangerous and well..........

Speak to your pdoc and be honest that you do self medicate and he can correspondingly look at what he can and cannot tweak to alleviate your suffering.

Take Care[/quote]

[paddym22]

Sorry Nirmal, for the misunderstanding and good that you are out of it. I handed over my meds to my sig other for a while until I trusted myself enough to administer them, yes I too use a daily divider for my meds. I am aware enough now when in crisis to keep taking my meds but to seek help rather than add doses myself. Other than that I keep a med chart which I tick off everyday at the appointed time when I have to take my meds.

[nirmal]

Hooray! I´m glad you´re out of that potentially deadly practice. I too will hand out to my husband my meds should I experience a mood shift and contact my pdoc ASAP.

I haven´tfelt this good in years and I plan on keeping it that way.

Thanks for your replies. I knew I wasn´t the only one who used to do that!

nirmal


]Sorry Nirmal, for the misunderstanding and good that you are out of it. I handed over my meds to my sig other for a while until I trusted myself enough to administer them, yes I too use a daily divider for my meds. I am aware enough now when in crisis to keep taking my meds but to seek help rather than add doses myself. Other than that I keep a med chart which I tick off everyday at the appointed time when I have to take my meds.[/quote]

[Sinabee]

I have never tried it but i think alot that I want to od on my meds.... I just want them to make me feel better!... I want to try it today...but I shouldnt. helppp?

[amaviena]

taking more than you're prescriped can actually cause quite a bit more trouble.

[jattitude]

The only problem I have had with meds when I was out of it is I have a tendancy to flush them. I get it in my head that they aren't working and don't need to take them or that they are making me worse. Doc doesn't like that too much and they insurance co. won't refill them because I flushed them, it only hurts me in the end, no matter how you look at it.

[thinker22]

Originally Posted by Sinabee

I have never tried it but i think alot that I want to od on my meds.... I just want them to make me feel better!... I want to try it today...but I shouldnt. helppp?

Hey S., if you're fantasizing about Od-ing on your meds, that's something a professional needs to know. If you have the courage to, tell your mom and have her keep your pills and give them to you at the appointed time. I have so many pills (most of them that made me feel worse or didn't work) left over from the past year of trial and error, I could definitely do some harm if I were so inclined, but remember that 1)It could kill you, 2)If it doesn't kill you it could cause permanent brain damage, 3)Your freedom will be taken away from you and you'll be mistrusted with meds from that point on. You may not even get the pills that could help you the most because the risk with ODing death on the powerful ones is so great.

Not worth it. But having feelings or thoughts are not wrong. I'm not judging you. I've thought the same thoughts too. Just be careful and let someone know if the urge becomes too strong to resist.

[Hunny]

may I compliment you all on your intelligence regarding the taking of these many meds and managing some very difficult situations. I for one am so proud of you for doing your absolute best to take care of yourselves.

It is helping me see, more clearly what some in my family have not been able to do and why. The fear and panic around someone oding is a tremendous strain on family members when it is happening and you are all taking steps to minimize the effects of this on yourself and your caring others.

Thank you for being open in sharing this information so that those of us who don't know your struggles with these issues can be supportive.

Wonderful!

Thanks,

Hunny

[nirmal]

Hey,

I agree. Almost one year ago I took an OD on all my meds plus what had been accumalated for some time. I was in a coma and almost died. I wasn´t breathing and they were deciding if they should do a trachetomy, but I began to breathe again so they didn´t, thank God. I was in the hospital for 2mon and lost 50lbs.

Now, thank God, I´m doing better than I have since first being diagnosed
with bipolar.(2004) I think everyone around me have more confidence concerning
me and medications, but I will not relent on all the stressors and triggers that usually accompany a mood shift, continue my weekly pill reminder, have my husband(and pdoc) on alert should I change in any way. I usually get real confused during a mood shift, and it is usually depression that brings on the suicidal feelings. I will do anything to keep my past mistakes in the past.

Please don´t make the same mistake as I did. It´s very costly in terms of what it does to you and you may end up dying. Please get help if anyone of you are thinking about doing what I did.

Thanks,
nirmal