Pills

It's nearly midnight. I went out and I was driving so I couldn't possibly take my pills when I was supposed to--too dangerous to drive. I felt it coming. Riding this hypomania out for a couple days now. I ask myself, what good do three pills do. What good? But they must be doing some good or I wouldn't be taking them, right? Oh, but they just flatten me out...I don't know what to say. I once had a pharmacist tell me I could skip my antidepressant every so often and not have to worry about it, but never ever skip the lithium. You know, stopping lithium increases your chance of suicide. But I can't sleep anyways so what good will cramming these pills down do? I keep meaning to fill my Lunesta...as soon as I can afford the 50$ copay. Just as soon and maybe I'll sleep then. I take my pills because I know mania precedes depression. I take my pills to prevent the madness from taking me away. One day, it won't be a question anymore. I'll take my pills tonight. You win.

Hi, Amanda ~ You have a lot of insight in knowing that mania precedes depression and that the meds really do do something. When you start your Lunesta, be sure to read the instructions. They should say not to take it with or after meals, as this delays the effect so much that you think the Lunesta isn't working. I take Lunesta and try to wait 2 or more hours after last meal. I also try not to eat anything for the next 30 minutes to one hour, if it doesn't kick in by then. Taken in this way, it works pretty well for this hard-core insomniac! ~ billieJ

I had depression there for a few days (actually numb sadness w/anxiety), but now I'm back to hypomania, so I relate. I'm worried I'll crash, so I toned down the one that makes me hyper at 300mg (Lamictal). I'm only taking 100mg at night and 150 in the am now. This meds tweaking sure is a delicate balance! Too much Risperdal and not enough Lamictal and I'm numb...switch them and I'm hyper. There has to be a positive somewhere in between where I'm not jumping out of my skin. Ya know?

It's funny but as soon as my insurance co will pay for my meds, I have a $20 copay for generic and $40 for name brand; but if I prove I'm too poor to pay for meds (which I am) and have no drug insurance I get them totally free direct from the company. So see, even then the insurance co screws me there. I'd be better off having no coverage. Not even sure when I'll be covered. I hope they just leave me alone. I hate insurance cos! It's a pathetic solution to an enormous problem. There has to be a better way than torturing both patient and doctor to rip each off. I wonder if there's a gov program that would pay my future copays and your Lunesta copay. Because what we need being out of reach makes a relapse more likely, which will cost everyone more money. Another dumb thing about insur cos...no preventative health care...hence more expensive solutions later.

I hope you keep taking your meds if they're working for you. If they make you feel terrible I can see why you'd be skipping them, but talk to the doc and see if you can get an adjustment if so. Don't get in over your head, okay?

Hello, I feel ur pain with the drugs not helping the mood swings. I know that sleep has always been an issue with both me and other that suffer bipolar. What can I tell you, yes I too need some type of aide when I am trying to sleep but unfortunately, when you are on a high or you can not sleep. It is a side effect from or illness. As far as the anti depressants, they only aide in the mood swing. I have had a hard time accepting that there is no cure for my mood swings but talking to someone who understands (usually the person is suffering some type of additions) can help your get through them.

I hope my long answers helps.

drugs help limit the frequency and variation of mood. They do not claim to CURE anything. I have these pencils I bought from a website that have "find the cure" printed on them and I love them. Pills are essential to life until a cure is discovered whether you take the herbal route or the chemical one.