[bridgie]

I've been strong for so long. Putting on a face that people will accept. I'm tired. My body and mind are weakening. I don't know how much longer this can go on. I need time alone. I need time in general. I feel like I'm going down and down my strength is being used up. Everyone has problems. And everyone shares. And I listen and give advise but it takes its toll on me. Now I'm lost and confused and have to energy to listen and give advise to myself. I'm shutting down I'm shutting out. I feel the anxiety coming on I need to hide I need to be alone with no contact for awhile. This is it.

[BNLsMOM]

If you can, post here and recieve support. Don't feel like you have to keep giving advice all the time. (((Hugs))) if you want them.

[thinker22]

I know the feeling. Let yourself rest. I'm still catching up on the sleep lost from over 2 months of mania. Depression can make you exhausted even without a previous mania episode.

Don't feel like you have to contribute anything here when you're that tired or hopeless. We still care about you and know that you care too.

[bridgie]

I just want to cry. I feel so drained. I think I've given a little too much of myself. A piece of myself. I don't think I'm getting it back.

[ZilchHour]

Hello Bridgie!

What I have been taught since my childhood that sharing never decreases anything, it replicates and multiplies. The only thing which is depreciated by the way of sharing is grief and pain. When you said nice things to others, shared your wisdom, felt their pain, relived their terrifying moments, you helped them with their challenges. This does not mean that you have lost a piece of yourself.

And if you cry, just remember that you are not alone, there are others who understand you, your tears and are saddend and agrieved by your distress. I had said it earlier in some other post and I say it again; and as I say I am re-telling the same to myself as well:

"Come on Rocky I didn't hear no bell, get up! Just one more round!"
(Mickey to Rocky, in the movie Rocky)

Regards
ZILCH HOUR

[lonegael]

((((((Bridgie))))) Lost too many pieces, dear? Here. Have one of mine. It might fit you better than it fits meRest if you need to. We'll still be here

[lynxlover]

Bridgie, I know what you mean. I dread to see some of my friends coming and I've stopping answering the phone. It's always about them and their gigantic life-threatning problems which is their obnoxious kids, bugs on the tomatoes, car making a funny noise or do I think their mate is cheating on them and the biggest complaint of all is I just don't realizie how tired they are and they wish they were like me, lay around all the time." Just tell them you have issues of your own and as soon as you solve yours you'll listen to theirs. Oh, by the way they never once ask how you feel.

[northern]

Originally Posted by lynxlover

Bridgie, I know what you mean. I dread to see some of my friends coming and I've stopping answering the phone. It's always about them and their gigantic life-threatning problems which is their obnoxious kids, bugs on the tomatoes, car making a funny noise or do I think their mate is cheating on them and the biggest complaint of all is I just don't realizie how tired they are and they wish they were like me, lay around all the time." Just tell them you have issues of your own and as soon as you solve yours you'll listen to theirs. Oh, by the way they never once ask how you feel.

We have the same friends. Just different places, how crazy is that

I got feed up with the ones always whineing about their awlful lives, would take hours of my time. Did they care that I might have not slept in 36hrs due to pain, insomnia, depression................OH! No!........soon as I started to say something about what was happening in my day, I would get 'Gotta go haven't time etc etc always some excuse to bugger off.

So I stopped answering the phone, got caller ID, stopped going out with them, just simply said NO! too sick & tired to be dragged around the shops then I'd say excately what they said to me the last time 'Gotta Go haven't time etc etc. Stopped inviting them over for coffee, even stopped opening the door, should they actually take the trouble to lobb onto my door step.

In total.....just the once. They just never bother with you unless it's all about them.

[Blu4u2]

Bridgie, I know the feeling I'm going through a major depression right now because of all my dealings with individuals. the truth of the matter is you can't give up on yourself because in the end your all that really matters, I'm sure they appreciated your supposrt though, I know I would.

[bridgie]

Today I feel so weak. I had to make extra effort to accomodate some people. I know they appreciate. And even bought me lunch but I am so tired now and I can feel the changes going on in my head. I have a feeling its going to get eorse before it gets better. I too have decided not to answer phone or texts. Not for awhile. I don't know if I cld handle what's on the other end. Or face it. So I'm gonna lay here for awhile and see if I get any energy.

[Moreta]

Don't internalize other people's problems!! I was doing that, and then when you add your own problems, you crash. You are only responsible for YOU! Learn how to set boundaries and let people know, that you can't help them and THEY need to work on THEIR OWN PROBLEMS. It's super hard to do at first, and you're first couple attempts probably won't work, but keep trying. They'll get it eventually. You're even taking the first steps by not answering your phone/texts. Try to stay in the moment, and don't worry about others. Focus on you and fix your problems.

The hardest thing to do is to do anything when you're depressed. Do something fun, and don't isolate yourself, because that will lead to a crisis situation. For example, when I was really depressed I would go hide in the closet, but now I go out and walk around or go to the gym. Good luck!

[ZilchHour]

Queen Accountant is right. It is really a good piece of advice. Sometimes we create our own miseries. And I do not know the key to success; but key to failure is to trying to please everybody!!! Give time and attention to yourself and do things that please and pacify you!

All the best!

Regards
ZILCH HOUR

[bridgie]

I've been trying to take care of just myself. Its hard when there are people that depend on me and I wld want them to be there for me if I need them and I know a cpl wld. I'm just feeling overwhelmed and its throwing me off

[Moreta]

Maybe try thinking about it this way....There are people who depend on you, but how can they depend on you if you can't take care of yourself. It seems very selfish, but what are you responsible for???? YOURSELF!!! Not other people. Before I went to the hospital I thought everyone depended on me, but I've come to find out, that if you're not there, they will be fine. Resign from being General Manager of the Universe!

Can you take a couple days off and just focus on you? People will generally understand if you need "alone" time. If they don't, then you really don't need those people in your life. The hardest relationship I've had to work on is with my mother. But you have to learn how to set boundaries with people. When was the last time one of the people that depends on you did something for you??

I'm not trying to sound harsh, but sometimes that's what does the trick. At least it worked with me...lol.